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EmmaGM 11-23-2012 01:19 PM

Anyone not do santa?
 
I don't think I want to. I just don't like it, seems like a pointless thing to lie about, and I want to focus on the religious aspect of Christmas. Maximum, we're considering telling the story of the saint and having a small tradition regarding that.

If you don't do Santa, how do you do it?

DS has several cousins very close to his age and I'm sure they'll all have Santa. How do I explain to him why a fat man doesn't come down our chimney to give him 800 presents? How do I keep the peace with my family when they're all ticked off that my son could potentially "ruin Christmas" for their kids? What do I do when my in-laws try to give him gifts "from Santa" because we won't (I'm positive this is some bull they'd pull)?

KaleidoscopeEyes 11-23-2012 01:26 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
we dont celebrate xmas or easter but we wouldnt do santa or bunny if we did. we also dont do tooth fairy. we explained to the kids what they mean to other families and for them not to spill the beans for other kids. im also an atheist, i dont believe in god, my kids know this but they also know they cant go around telling kids there isnt a god either

Erinne 11-23-2012 01:28 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
My dd (3yo) knows about Santa because of tv and books, but she knows it's just pretend. She's in love with the tooth fairy and talks about her all the time, but every so often, she'll say, "my mama's the tooth fairy!" and knowing that doesn't seem to ruin it for her, so I assume Santa will be the same way. When other people say anything about Santa I think she just assumes that they know and are pretending and responds appropriately.

KnitterBug Creations 11-23-2012 01:29 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
we don't do santa either...well we dont' teach the kids that santa brings presents and watches everything you do etc... We basically just let the kids think he's just a holiday figure like the easter bunny or something. he's not real, he's just for fun. My kids are 5 and 2 and they both understand that. They are young still(and homeschooled) so I dont' really have to worry about them running up to their firends and telling them santa's not real or things like that.

newtocloth2 11-23-2012 01:30 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't really do Santa. We let them watch Christmas movies with Santa, and just tell him he's not real.
We don't really have family issues with it, since we don't live near either sides of our family. I'm not sure if my IL know or care that we don't do Santa. All of the gifts under the tree are from mommy and daddy or grandma or aunt, none from Santa.

crunch!910 11-23-2012 01:32 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We do not do Santa. Or the Easter Bunny. Or Tooth Fairy. Or.. whatever. Not that we have a ban on those things in this house. We still watch movies such as the Polar Express and other christmas movies. It is just a matter of we do not teach that those things are REAL and exist. The kids can, however, pretend and play. Much like my son can get the plastic extension from the sweeper and call it a "sword", or pretend a stick is a gun, or pretend there are fish in a bowl of water, or use nothing but a string to "fish" in the bathtub.

We are Christian and try to celebrate the Holidays in our own way. Such as thanksgiving, I refuse to tell my boys the fake story. Even though it has a very ugly history behind it, how so many native americans were slaughtered, I'll use that history lesson to teach my boys to be opened minded, kind, and thankful. Turn a bad thing into a good thing.

justsamma 11-23-2012 01:33 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by KaleidoscopeEyes (Post 15962620)
we dont celebrate xmas or easter but we wouldnt do santa or bunny if we did. we also dont do tooth fairy. we explained to the kids what they mean to other families and for them not to spill the beans for other kids. im also an atheist, i dont believe in god, my kids know this but they also know they cant go around telling kids there isnt a god either

this is our plan. we will celebrate major holidays but i will not lie about it and they will know that the gifts come from us.

Leah52 11-23-2012 01:35 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't do Santa or baby Jesus, just a tree and a few gifts from us. We do stockings just because I think they are fun, it's all from me though. Both my husband and I were raised in families that didn't do Christmas at all so we just pick and choose what we want to do.

MommyLyssa 11-23-2012 02:17 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by crunch!910 (Post 15962633)
We do not do Santa. Or the Easter Bunny. Or Tooth Fairy. Or.. whatever. Not that we have a ban on those things in this house. We still watch movies such as the Polar Express and other christmas movies. It is just a matter of we do not teach that those things are REAL and exist. The kids can, however, pretend and play. Much like my son can get the plastic extension from the sweeper and call it a "sword", or pretend a stick is a gun, or pretend there are fish in a bowl of water, or use nothing but a string to "fish" in the bathtub.

We are Christian and try to celebrate the Holidays in our own way. Such as thanksgiving, I refuse to tell my boys the fake story. Even though it has a very ugly history behind it, how so many native americans were slaughtered, I'll use that history lesson to teach my boys to be opened minded, kind, and thankful. Turn a bad thing into a good thing.

Pretty much this :)

DalesWidda 11-23-2012 02:26 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
I got flack for this last time I admitted this, but I used to do Santa. And the tooth fairy. And the Easter Bunny. Etc, Etc. I am tired of sneaking around my own house, sticking my hand under pillows and praying noone wakes up and "catches" me. I'm tired of getting up at midnight to quietly tiptoe around and put presents under the tree. So, I came clean to my older kids and I am NOT doing Santa with my youngest. We can still visit santa and watch Santa movies, but I am going to make sure she knows that he isn't real. And no more tooth fairy. Oy vey that's a pain in the neck.

jojoreta 11-23-2012 02:27 PM

I don't do Santa. My daughter knows he isn't real but she is reminded every year that a lot of kids do think he is real so we need to let then believe that. She's always been very smart when it comes to things like that but she does like to pretend he is real sometimes which is fine with me. I'm not going to stomp on her imagination for a couple weeks a year ;)

graceworks 11-23-2012 02:32 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
no santa here either. My 2 year old knows who he is from decorations, books, etc but doesn't have any idea about the gift giving aspect. We will never tell her that Santa is real. To me, that's lying.

When she is old enough to have "believing" friends we will tell her not to argue with them, and that some parents pretend he is real.

Christmas is about Jesus' birth here. We do all the traditional Christmasy things, just not Santa, although we are not anti-Santa either. She has a Santa book and a few Santa ornaments.

It seems kind of silly to me to go to so much fuss to perpetuate the Santa thing to your kids. But to each their own. (I didn't grow up in a Santa household either so maybe thats part of it)

GodLover 11-23-2012 02:41 PM

No Santa here but I am going to try the elf on the shelf this year :)

EmmaGM 11-23-2012 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GodLover
No Santa here but I am going to try the elf on the shelf this year :)

Isn't the elf story that he's like a lookout for Santa?

EmilytheStrange 11-23-2012 03:51 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
no Santa here. DD got a book about him last year, but it's a touch and feel type, so I just let her touch and feel. She doesn't watch movies and all that, so that's not an issue.

DH wants to incorporate some Santa magic, so we'll see later. This year it isn't going to happen. She's 2. We have a book about baby Jesus and it ends with 'I am the reason for Christmas Day'. That's my itinerary - teach her about baby Jesus' birth and that we are celebrating that birth on Christmas. done.

I've wanted to do Elf on the Shelf because I like the IDEA.. but not the whole 'spy on you and report your deeds to Santa'. If you do him just as a mischevious being that spends December in your house, you could pull it off. Again, though, that's a lot of effort for a 2yr old.. I'll think about it next year when she'd actually really notice.

ETA: if someone gives my child a gift from Santa or when we go to a holiday festival and Santa is there, I will not get all upset. I will just tell her that it's Santa. The same way that I tell her about the firefighters that dress up in the dog costume, the Sesame Street people who danced at the last event we went to, or any other 'character'. I really don't think it's worth getting upset about. Santa is the same as Mickey Mouse - not real, but not worth raising my blood pressure about.

threelittlehoneys 11-23-2012 03:59 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't do santa. At first everyone in our families were pretty shocked, and some of them VERY upset, when we told them. Everyone got used to the idea, and while my grandma still brings it up sometimes, everyone has realized that we're not going to do something because it's important to THEM. Luckily everyone eventually accepted it. If we had someone in the family try to give our kids gifts from santa I would honestly be flaming livid. Maybe unreasonably upset over it. But I would absolutely not allow someone to talk to my kids about him being real and giving them gifts from him.

We talk to the kids about traditions, and how everyone has different traditions, and you can start traditions etc, and how some families choose to pretend santa is real with their kids. Im going to have to have a talk with my kids again this year because we might be visiting family in Canada, where one house might be "visited by santa" on christmas eve, so I want to clarify with my kids so they're not confused or so my 3.5 yo doesn't "spill the beans"

kierstenw 11-23-2012 04:25 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't do Santa. I don't have any advice since DD is only 6.5mo, but we will focus on family and community (volunteering, giving to Toys for Tots, etc.) I know this will start a war, but I think it is ridiculous to run around creating evidence that Santa is real, only for them to find out in 8-10 years that it's all a lie. Not for me, thanks.

I am adamant about making sure that they don't tell other kids that what they believe is wrong or a lie. Like KaleidoscopeEyes, we are atheists and plan to just tell our children that some people choose to believe in God and that it is their prerogative. They will be respectful toward everyone regardless of whether they believe in a giant egg-laying bunny, a fat guy with flying reindeer and superhuman time-traveling powers, or an invisible and all-knowing man in the sky. That's part of our general parenting philosophy and not specifically taught during the holidays.

knodceo 11-23-2012 04:35 PM

Wishing we didn't do Santa! My almost 5 year old is questioning it big time. We debated before she was old enough to understand...and we are digging ourself into a bigger hole of lies when she asks us questions...we have decided to tun it around and let her lead the way. We brought back the elf...and she has already asked if he is just a stuffed toy...we turn it around to get her thoughts.

I don't think we were harmed in having a Santa, bunny or tooth fairy. Kids should be kids and enjoy the magic involved in being a kid.

That being said we don't like to lie...we also do not believe in a higher power...

essential1892 11-23-2012 04:56 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We do santa, easter bunny, tooth fairy.

I think that it makes things magical- I love that my kids are still so young that they believe in these things. We aren't religious so the holidays are just fun days to us that we celebrate with family.

My five year old came home from school the other day and said that his friend told him that there is no santa- I was so sad. I felt like his innocence was taken away (totally overreacting, I know).

Like I said, holidays to us are just for fun and adding in santa and his cohorts makes it that much more fun for us.

hac1224 11-23-2012 05:17 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by RainandRedemption (Post 15962963)
We don't do santa. At first everyone in our families were pretty shocked, and some of them VERY upset, when we told them. Everyone got used to the idea, and while my grandma still brings it up sometimes, everyone has realized that we're not going to do something because it's important to THEM. Luckily everyone eventually accepted it. If we had someone in the family try to give our kids gifts from santa I would honestly be flaming livid. Maybe unreasonably upset over it. But I would absolutely not allow someone to talk to my kids about him being real and giving them gifts from him.

We talk to the kids about traditions, and how everyone has different traditions, and you can start traditions etc, and how some families choose to pretend santa is real with their kids.
Im going to have to have a talk with my kids again this year because we might be visiting family in Canada, where one house might be "visited by santa" on christmas eve, so I want to clarify with my kids so they're not confused or so my 3.5 yo doesn't "spill the beans"

Exactly us on the bolded, except only DH's parents made a big deal about it. His mom even called my mom extremely upset when she first found out many years ago. Mom my basically told her that we didn't make a big deal of it growing up. I think my MIL realized she was the only one bothered and had to get over it. My kids know a little about the real St. Nicolas and know that lots of others kids believe in Santa. It's not really a big deal to them either.

tricia17lee 11-23-2012 05:55 PM

We don't do Santa either. DD knows about Santa the character because it is unavoidable, but we tell her he's a pretend character or game people like to play. We will continue explaining this year that some kids believe Santa is a real person and we don't spoil their surprise. I was raised with this idea myself.

We are Christian and while we do some 'secular' traditions like the tree and stocking, not playing into the Santa thing is more than just that for me.

I hope I don't get flamed for saying this- so those who disagree just know this is my own perspective.... I feel that it isn't fair to take advantages of a child's youth, imagination, trust, and blind faith in their parents to take advantage and essentially lie about big things like the Santa fantasy. I want my children to know that I would never mislead them, lie to them, or hurt them - especially over a game. Some kids are seriously upset when they learn Santa isn't real. I feel it can create a sense of distrust in adults- 'what else have you told me that isn't true'.

I work in the infant mental health field and decided long before I had children that I would be very careful in not abusing my child's innocent faith in me. Of course my daughter lives in a world of fantasy of her own with pretend play and as she tries to figure out how things work ... And I'm definitely not talking her out of that or spoiling her own fantasies and imagination or expecting her to get a hard dose of reality about everything. What I don't do is make up stories and convince her they are true or use them to my advantage.

jen_batten 11-23-2012 08:16 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't do Santa. Or any of the other holiday characters. We do tell our kids that it is just a story that some people like to pretend. I haven't specifically talked to them about not telling other kids that it's not real, but it hasn't been an issue so far. I will say I get quite sick of all the santa comment directed at my kids...."Are you looking forward to Santa?....Have you been good this year? It's almost time for good ol st. nick!.....What did Santa bring you this year?" My kids kind of give those comments a deer in the headlights look as I have to explain (yet again) to some random stranger that we don't do santa.

ajbailey89 11-23-2012 08:26 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by crunch!910 (Post 15962633)
We do not do Santa. Or the Easter Bunny. Or Tooth Fairy. Or.. whatever. Not that we have a ban on those things in this house. We still watch movies such as the Polar Express and other christmas movies. It is just a matter of we do not teach that those things are REAL and exist. The kids can, however, pretend and play. Much like my son can get the plastic extension from the sweeper and call it a "sword", or pretend a stick is a gun, or pretend there are fish in a bowl of water, or use nothing but a string to "fish" in the bathtub.

We are Christian and try to celebrate the Holidays in our own way. Such as thanksgiving, I refuse to tell my boys the fake story. Even though it has a very ugly history behind it, how so many native americans were slaughtered, I'll use that history lesson to teach my boys to be opened minded, kind, and thankful. Turn a bad thing into a good thing.

:yeahthat:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leah52 (Post 15962640)
We don't do Santa or baby Jesus, just a tree and a few gifts from us. We do stockings just because I think they are fun, it's all from me though. Both my husband and I were raised in families that didn't do Christmas at all so we just pick and choose what we want to do.

Same here.

essential1892 11-23-2012 08:42 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
I actually feel less silly telling my kids about santa than telling them there is a man in the sky who looks over us. We all have different ways of raising our kids and the great thing is that all of our kids are going to turn out just fine:goodvibes:

Plus I'm sure that my son will ruin the santa thing for his two little sisters before I know it!

Connor 11-23-2012 10:29 PM

We don't do Santa either. My DS is newly 3 and we haven't talked about it either. My DS doesn't watch tv but my friend has mentioned Honey Boo Boo briefly in the past. A few days ago at the store he pointed out Santa several times and declared, "Honey Boo Boo!" Funniest thing ever.

rverrone11 11-23-2012 11:40 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't do Santa, but I don't really know if my girls believe in Santa or not. We never flat out told them that there isn't a Santa, but they don't get presents from Santa.

My 5 year old DD asked me tonight if the tooth fairy leaves money under your pillow when you lose a tooth. I told her the tooth fairy wasn't real and that mommy or daddy are the tooth fairy, but we will leave money when she loses a tooth. She said she knew there wasn't really a tooth fairy (though I don't know if she was just saying that). But she didn't seem bothered by it. I think I'll tell her about Santa this year.

raisingcropsandbabies 11-24-2012 05:55 AM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by EmmaGM (Post 15962610)
I don't think I want to. I just don't like it, seems like a pointless thing to lie about, and I want to focus on the religious aspect of Christmas. Maximum, we're considering telling the story of the saint and having a small tradition regarding that.

If you don't do Santa, how do you do it?

DS has several cousins very close to his age and I'm sure they'll all have Santa. How do I explain to him why a fat man doesn't come down our chimney to give him 800 presents? How do I keep the peace with my family when they're all ticked off that my son could potentially "ruin Christmas" for their kids? What do I do when my in-laws try to give him gifts "from Santa" because we won't (I'm positive this is some bull they'd pull)?

I told the kids this year that St. Nicholas was really a man and he was kind and generous, but he is in heaven now. And that Santa Claus is like a symbol of St. Nick and people dress up as him because he was such a kind man and it's fun. The older ones are 4 and 5 years old and they JUST are understanding that. Last year we talked about it and it flew over their heads and so we just went along with the Santa thing then. I told we can still set out reindeer food and set out Christmas cookies (and that Papa eats him and they LOVED that and thought it was funny). I told them they are NEVER to talk about St. Nick being dead to other people because some people and kids still believe he's alive and that's okay. And that they can pretend if they want to too.

So we still watch Santa movies and do crafts and other traditions, but they know it's all for fun and not real (well, they are still processing it because of how often they talk to me about it and get re-affirmed that Santa is just pretend). So if your children are younger than that, you might just want to play along because they will not get it. My younger two kids are 2-1/2 and 1 and so that's a lost cause. But for the 4 and 5 year olds, it was good timing this year to discuss it all.

We really emphasize Christ during this time more than Santa. It's such an awesome time to teach them how a baby can change the whole world! And about the gift Jesus is. Some fun books that are great for preschoolers are Crystal Bowman's board books for the holidays. It gives such a nice picture in words and illustrations about why we celebrate what we do and in a way that preschoolers can understand it (she has books about Christmas trees, angels, stars, candy canes, the birth of our Savior). I highly recommend them when they are this little.

As for family, both DH and I were raised knowing Santa is not alive. We were not traumatized and so our families aren't an issue. We each have a sibling who has their kids believe in Santa though so it's not something we discuss so they can keep that going for their kids. :) To each their own!

crunch!910 11-24-2012 07:28 AM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
My mom was trying to INSIST I HAD to take the boys to go see Santa. My mom has photos of us doing that, being terrified, but still making us sit on his lap and take a picture of us crying. I think that is cruel. so I just told her "Why? So Santa can terrify them and they sit on his lap and cry? No thanks."

I'm not sure I've even ever told her that we do not do Santa. I actually don't tell anyone really, just to avoid the "WHAT!? You HAVE to do Santa!" responses. My coworkers finally got it out of me last Christmas because they kept asking "What's Santa getting him?" So finally had to say that we don't do Santa, and we only do a reasonable amount of presents that they know/will know is from us, each other, and family members. My coworkers still bought a present for m y son last year. One wrote "from Santa Carol." Whenever it come sup, such as if the boys are asked "What did you get from Santa"? we'll just have to keep reminding them thta people like to pretend he is real, but keep telling the story of St Nicholas.

crunch!910 11-24-2012 07:38 AM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't really do Santa in this house, but I do like to tell the story of St. Nicholas and use the story to encourage gift giving and generosity. Anyone have recommendations for children's books about the REAL history behind St Nick and Christmas? Looked last night and could only find Santa and Elves and all that. Boo! But I'm also cautious of buying online, because I like to look through the story and the pictures to make sure I approve of it, kwim?

umphreysmommy 11-24-2012 09:33 AM

We don't do Santa but are not anti either. Obviously my 3 year old knows who he is and we have Santa decorations but we don't say he is brining gifts or put anything under the tree from Santa. They are young enough that we just don't do it. Santa is the same in this house as frosty or Rudolph. When they get older not sure how exactly I will address why Santa doesn't come here.

SaraElise 11-24-2012 09:51 AM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We do Santa, but I know plenty of families who don't and instead focus on the Nativity story, and traditions involving St. Nicholas and other fun December Saints like St. Lucia.

I probably wouldn't go so far as to emphasize "Santa isn't real" if we ever decided to go that route, but just do our own thing instead and focus on that. If questions came up I would answer them talking about how the tradition came about (St. Nicholas) and how it's a way that some people continue to celebrate him.

umphreysmommy 11-24-2012 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaraElise
We do Santa, but I know plenty of families who don't and instead focus on the Nativity story, and traditions involving St. Nicholas and other fun December Saints like St. Lucia.

I probably wouldn't go so far as to emphasize "Santa isn't real" if we ever decided to go that route, but just do our own thing instead and focus on that. If questions came up I would answer them talking about how the tradition came about (St. Nicholas) and how it's a way that some people continue to celebrate him.

The second paragraph is how we do it. We don't do Santa brining gifts but I don't right out tell them he isn't real. I just don't feed into the lies though. I don't have to explain other characters are not real. We went to disney this month and I kept telling my daughter we would see the princess's and Mickey and she said "it isn't the real princess just someone dressed up" but she still loved doing it.

alice_hallett 11-24-2012 11:24 AM

We don't do Santa. There are new gifts under the tree Christmas morning. They just understand that they're from us, not Santa. So they're still surprised and excited. As for them accidentally telling other kids the truth, we coach them when the season starts. Telling them that even though they know the truth, other children may not, and it's up to their mom and dad to tell them the truth, not us. When they were younger we mentioned it every few days so it would get ingrained in them ;). Now that they're older we don't have to be so vigilant. And we homeschool so there's fewer possibilities for spreading the truth anyway.

We don't live near family so don't really have to worry about them giving Santa gifts.

Ainmemphis 11-24-2012 12:28 PM

I'm struggling with this for my 3 year old. We have done pictures with Santa every year and he knows Santa by images but when asked about Santa bringing presents he insists that Santa does not bring presents grandma and grandpa do. Which is true. So I'm not sure what we will do from here. I guess we will still visit Santa but not have ds "get" gifts from Santa on Christmas morning?

HillbillyMama 11-24-2012 01:07 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
We don't do Santa or Easter Bunny, and won't do the tooth fairy, either....But we try to have a 3 year old kid level discussion with our son about it (which gets about as far as you think it does! LOL!!) explaining that its make believe fun for people and to not ruin the surprise for other kids. We tell him how Christmas is an American holiday (we personally
lean more towards a Messianic belief that Jesus was born during the fall, to coincide with the feast of Tabernacles) and that the tree, decorations, songs, etc... are an American tradition. We hope to use that time when they are older to focus on helping in the community, etc...simply because the focus on gifts is just a little too much for our liking :)

bluedaisyma 11-24-2012 01:43 PM

Re: Anyone not do santa?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by crunch!910 (Post 15962633)
We do not do Santa. Or the Easter Bunny. Or Tooth Fairy. Or.. whatever. Not that we have a ban on those things in this house. We still watch movies such as the Polar Express and other christmas movies. It is just a matter of we do not teach that those things are REAL and exist. The kids can, however, pretend and play. Much like my son can get the plastic extension from the sweeper and call it a "sword", or pretend a stick is a gun, or pretend there are fish in a bowl of water, or use nothing but a string to "fish" in the bathtub.

We are Christian and try to celebrate the Holidays in our own way. Such as thanksgiving, I refuse to tell my boys the fake story. Even though it has a very ugly history behind it, how so many native americans were slaughtered, I'll use that history lesson to teach my boys to be opened minded, kind, and thankful. Turn a bad thing into a good thing.

yup. dh isn't Christian but he doesn't do Santa either. I used to have to tell my older kids not to tell their friends that Santa wasn't real, but that wasn't a big deal. We still do gifts and everything, just not santa or elf on a shelf, etc

MyM&W 11-24-2012 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HillbillyMama
We don't do Santa or Easter Bunny, and won't do the tooth fairy, either....But we try to have a 3 year old kid level discussion with our son about it (which gets about as far as you think it does! LOL!!) explaining that its make believe fun for people and to not ruin the surprise for other kids. We tell him how Christmas is an American holiday (we personally
lean more towards a Messianic belief that Jesus was born during the fall, to coincide with the feast of Tabernacles) and that the tree, decorations, songs, etc... are an American tradition. We hope to use that time when they are older to focus on helping in the community, etc...simply because the focus on gifts is just a little too much for our liking :)

Same..^^

ajane 11-25-2012 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tricia17lee

I hope I don't get flamed for saying this- so those who disagree just know this is my own perspective.... I feel that it isn't fair to take advantages of a child's youth, imagination, trust, and blind faith in their parents to take advantage and essentially lie about big things like the Santa fantasy. I want my children to know that I would never mislead them, lie to them, or hurt them - especially over a game. Some kids are seriously upset when they learn Santa isn't real. I feel it can create a sense of distrust in adults- 'what else have you told me that isn't true'.

I work in the infant mental health field and decided long before I had children that I would be very careful in not abusing my child's innocent faith in me. Of course my daughter lives in a world of fantasy of her own with pretend play and as she tries to figure out how things work ... And I'm definitely not talking her out of that or spoiling her own fantasies and imagination or expecting her to get a hard dose of reality about everything. What I don't do is make up stories and convince her they are true or use them to my advantage.

This made me laugh out loud. Santa is a real person, btw. We don't make up stories, convince our kids they are true or use them to our advantage. Children's sense of imagination is actually normal.

ajane 11-25-2012 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EmmaGM
I don't think I want to. I just don't like it, seems like a pointless thing to lie about, and I want to focus on the religious aspect of Christmas. Maximum, we're considering telling the story of the saint and having a small tradition regarding that.

DS has several cousins very close to his age and I'm sure they'll all have Santa. How do I explain to him why a fat man doesn't come down our chimney to give him 800 presents? How do I keep the peace with my family when they're all ticked off that my son could potentially "ruin Christmas" for their kids? What do I do when my in-laws try to give him gifts "from Santa" because we won't (I'm positive this is some bull they'd pull)?

Santa comes to our house and all of our kids believe in him. I'm not going to shut down their imaginative process. I let them believe what they want and what they think they should. If they ask questions then I ask them what they feel or think. I leave it up to them. The religious aspect is why we celebrate Christmas and why the believe in Santa. The spirit and gift giving of St. Nicholas is continued through Santa.

800 presents, that is quite a few, lol. If you and your son don't respect others who do or want to believe, then yes I would be pretty upset. If you want the same respect then you should show it also.

EmmaGM 11-25-2012 03:00 PM

I don't know why you would assume I plan to be disrespectful? I don't want him to ruin Santa for his cousins and I'll coach him that some children believe Santa is real and we shouldn't ruin it for them.

And believe me, being respectful with my in-laws does not beget respect.


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