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-   -   I think I've made a terrible mistake. .. (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1480309)

okiemama 01-11-2013 09:47 AM

I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
Dh got the big v and I was on board100% until recently.... I've been having and itchy womb and twitchy ovaries. I think even part of dh slightly regrets it because I was several days late and I said "H what if I'm pregnant! ?!?" And he said "I would be happy" wtf??! After we had dd2 he was waaaay done I was on the fence I started to lean towards being done but now I keep dreaming of babies ugh I guess I'm just confused :( we don't have the $$$ for a reversal so I guess if we can't afford that we shouldn't be having a baby anyway:(

oneduckstuck5 01-11-2013 02:17 PM

Re: I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
Well, I'll give you my story. We had four and had a v. I started to regret it when #4 was still pretty young. Started researching adoption, thought that was maybe what we were being called to do. Fast forward to when my dd #4 was about 4. I told dh I needed to move forward and just get rid of all the baby items I was hanging onto or we needed to decide if we were going to have more somehow (I had also discovered some drs. that did reversals fairly inexpensively on one of my homeschool forums so that was something we had just vaguely discussed).

After much discussion, dh and I both felt like we were supposed to get it reversed so we drove from NC to Oklahoma (I see that's where you live) and had a reversal done. Total cost of the surgery was $1700 and as you can see from my sig. it was a success. I would be glad to share anymore info. with you if you want it. Blessings to you! I know it's a hard place to be.

Teddyandnick 01-11-2013 02:29 PM

I know how you feel. I had my tubes tied and DH got a v too just to make sure there weren't any surprises. We decided when DS1 starts kindergarten I am going to start pharmacy school. And as expensive as that is, I did not want to end up pregnant during school and have to put it on hold with a ton of money in student loans and not being able to afford the payments. DS1 and DS2 are both very high energy, high needs boys so most days I am completely happy with the decision. Every once in a while I wish for another one. I figure if we decide to add to our family later we can always do adoption or even foster care.

marliah 01-11-2013 02:40 PM

Re: I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
Like the other momma said, there are places that offer relatively inexpensive reversals. Maybe look into that. :)

Melinda29 01-12-2013 04:13 PM

Re: I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
I think that is pretty common to second-guess a major decision, even for a long time after. I question stuff all the time, should we have moved here, should we have spaced our kids differently, should we have started a business. The grass often seems greener, but then I remind myself why we made those decisions in the first place. Hugs, I hope you find peace soon :)

MelDM 01-16-2013 03:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Melinda29
I think that is pretty common to second-guess a major decision, even for a long time after. I question stuff all the time, should we have moved here, should we have spaced our kids differently, should we have started a business. The grass often seems greener, but then I remind myself why we made those decisions in the first place. Hugs, I hope you find peace soon :)

I agree with this. Think about the reasons you made the decision in the first place. If you TRULY want another, then save up/get a reversal. I had my tubes tied and sometimes long to be pregnant/have another baby. But then I think, do I want another toddler/child/teenager? NOPE! I think it's normal to have regrets, and feel sadness when a chapter of our life closes.

mommycass 02-15-2013 12:01 PM

Re: I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
I'm praying I don't feel this way if/when Dh gets a V. I'm still not 100% sure. I have thought though; if he does get a V and in 5 years we want another baby then we could foster or adopt?!
Hope you all can work something out to bring you peace!

Lolobug 02-16-2013 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MelDM

I agree with this. Think about the reasons you made the decision in the first place. If you TRULY want another, then save up/get a reversal. I had my tubes tied and sometimes long to be pregnant/have another baby. But then I think, do I want another toddler/child/teenager? NOPE! I think it's normal to have regrets, and feel sadness when a chapter of our life closes.

I agree with both these mamas! DH and I have not had any procedures to prevent pregnancy but we both think we may be done. I feel sad about it from time to time, I honestly think I'm grieving the closing of this amazing chapter. Whichever decision you make in the end will be the right choice. My favorite affirmation, "It will work out or it will work out." GL to you!

NH2NCMomOf3 02-26-2013 08:14 AM

Re: I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
we just had baby #3 in December...older boys 9 and 6 AND now we have our dd. Hubby was quick to go get vas consult....but now he hasn't done anything about it. I wouldn't care if we had one more but I'm starting to think he diesnt want the vas either. Maybe we will just wait.....

homebirthmom 02-26-2013 09:44 AM

Re: I think I've made a terrible mistake. ..
 
wow $1700 only for a reversal? thats nothing!!! I would be flying there for sure.
we wont be doing VS or tube tying but some days I just want to be done and then other days I am aching for a baby.
I have had 10 pregnancies now. you'd think I would be 100% done. nope.


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