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-   -   How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children? (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1470935)

RainandRedemption 12-09-2012 11:10 AM

Most people agree a couple drinks every once in a while is fine, but when does it become a problem? Where is the line where you begin to have negative influence on your kids? And when do you say, ok you really have a problem, you're not bring responsible in your marriage and parenting?
Does it make a difference how old your kids are? Small children versus young teens?

Just anything you think on the topic, please share.

We saw some family last night and the behavior and surroundings were a bit alarming to me..... Not a point where Im worried fir any ones safety, but certainly concerned about where these ppl are heading, as far as health happiness and being united as a family. I'm close enough to one of these ppl that I might talk to him, although I have no idea how to go about it or what to say at this point.

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mommygonewild 12-09-2012 11:13 AM

Re: How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children?
 
Drinking is less socially acceptable but a lot of families have parents that medicate themselves to get through the day/stress, etc which I think is just as bad but less visible.

KaleidoscopeEyes 12-09-2012 11:15 AM

Re: How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children?
 
i think as long as you arent passing out or acting belligerent it's ok. i could easily have a couple beers every night or some wine. mostly because i enjoy the taste. drinking that little i just feel a little relaxed. I dont drink all the time btw lol just saying i could.

babynme8 12-09-2012 11:25 AM

Re: How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children?
 
I was in the same situation last year with a dear friend. In fact her daughter did get hurt while she was drinking. She was drinking at a friends house and her child was playing with the other kids and got her finger closed in door and it was severed to the bone. Both moms were too intoxicated to drive the child to ER and had to call the husband home from work (works 2nd shift). She didn't lose her finger but has nerve damage and can not feel the tip.

My friend had always been a drinker but after she had her daughter it seemed to get worse. I don't think she can handle the stress of parenting and turns to drinking. I remained friends with her after this incident but she has since had twins and the drinking got worse. She would be drinking at someone's house and her husband would come home from work at 11pm and have to go pick up his kids because she had been drinking all night. I tried to talk to her about it and she told me to mind my own business. I could no longer stand by and watch her put her littles in harms way and cause problems in her marriage so I walked away. I let her know that if she wanted help with her drinking or her kids I would be there for her but until she cuts back ALOT or stops we won't be hanging out. I haven't talked to her in over a year. One of our mutual friends still keeps in touch with her and she told me they are actually losing their house after Christmas because they can't make their house payment her husband blames her due to her drinking habit. She told our friend her drinking is not a big deal she only has 8-10 beers a night through the week and an 18 pack on friday and saturday.

It's a tough situation but if you do say something be prepared that it may hurt the relationship.

ETA:
I don't have anything against drinking I myself may have a glass or two of wine every once in awhile. But I do have a problem with keeping your kids out all hours of the night so you can drink, being so drunk that you can not properly supervise your children, and drinking away your money to the point that you have put yourself in a financial hardship.

Puppydog 12-09-2012 11:27 AM

Re: How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children?
 
I feel that as long as you are controlled its fine.

I wouldn't drink every day/night but DH has a glass or two at least 4 times a week. I have a glass or two some weekends.

hilaryisinked 12-09-2012 11:32 AM

I have a very strong opinion on the matter. This all stems from something that happened in my childhood. I was 13 and on dialysis for kidney failure. My mom got drunk at a Christmas party and was unable to hook me up to my dialysis machine. I could have died because she had too good of a time at a party. The entire night and next day I suffered until I could get hooked up again for treatment. In my opinion no parent should ever be so incoherent they cannot care for their child. Most people's kids don't have health problems like that but if an emergency happens, I don't want to be too drunk to drive my kids to the ER.
I drink a glass of wine here and there; maybe once a week. Never more and never on a night DH has a night shift. He doesn't really drink but will have a glass with me every now and then but no more than one.

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RainandRedemption 12-09-2012 11:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by babynme8
She told our friend her drinking is not a big deal she only has 8-10 beers a night through the week and an 18 pack on friday and saturday.

It's a tough situation but if you do say something be prepared that it may hurt the relationship.

This is closer to the number of drinks I'm talking about. More liquor, less beer.
Very worried about hindering the relationship.

This man has always been the type to stay in control, but lately I've been seeing him do some things that I find very alarming... And careless. I'm pretty worried about this becoming a path that he's choosing

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UmmKira 12-09-2012 11:37 AM

Re: How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children?
 
We don't drink as a matter of principle, but I do think that for parents who don't see it as inherently bad should have it in a locked cabinet once the kids have an idea that it is "for adults". Curiosity is too strong and everyone I know who had alcohol in the house tried it pretty early on from their parents stash.

KaleidoscopeEyes 12-09-2012 11:38 AM

Re: How much drinking is acceptable when youre raising children?
 
dh doesnt drink at all so we always have a sober adult around

RainandRedemption 12-09-2012 11:41 AM

.

Trying not to share too much about the ppl I'm talking about.


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