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Old 03-10-2012, 08:35 PM   #1
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Should I let my toddler nurse too

My son is 21 months old and has been weaned from nursing since he was 9 months due to my milk drying up from us both having the flu. I now have an 8 week old daughter who nurses, and my son has been pulling my shirt down, trying to unclasp my bra and screaming cause he wants to nurse too. I feel bad. Part of me wants to let him, but then the other part of me doesn't want to encourage regression behavior. What would you do?

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Old 03-10-2012, 08:48 PM   #2
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

Well really do whatever you feel comfortable with. At 21 months I would not really consider nursing regressive behavior especially since he weaned due to illness. He may not remember how to latch and may not actually nurse but I see no harm in letting him try.
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Old 03-10-2012, 08:49 PM   #3
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

Let him nurse (if you are okay with it). I say that because if you let him and he decides it isn't what he thought and doesn't want to nurse anymore, it will be his choice and the behavior will stop - he'll move on. If he does want to continue nursing, it may not last long or he may start nursing again. You just won't know until you let him try.

Maybe get a copy of the book called "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" and see how you feel. If you are open to it, it might be a really neat and enjoyable experience for both of you and may lead to a special bond between him and your new LO. There are other benefits to extended nursing so I'd say its not a "regression" like it's a bad thing, kwim?
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Old 03-10-2012, 08:57 PM   #4
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

I think if you're comfortable with it, give it a try. Likely he won't remember how to latch well and it won't be fun/comforting for him and he won't want to anymore. If he does though, then it might be nice to get to nurse him again since you weaned when it wasn't really planned. But if you're not comfortable with it, I'd just distract him if at all possible. Maybe pull out some new cool something that is only a "When mommy is nursing" activity. Shaving cream on a table will keep toddlers entertained forever if he won't eat it. lol.
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Old 03-10-2012, 08:58 PM   #5
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

I had a similar thing happen when I had my youngest 6 months ago. His brother was 19 months at the time and had been weaned since 11 months but when he saw the new baby nursing he wanted to also. I let him and he tried for about 2 min and laughed and ran away....he has never asked since. Maybe just let him try and he can decide if he wants to continue or not.
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Old 03-10-2012, 09:09 PM   #6
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

Quote:
Originally Posted by momma2eliandisaac View Post
I had a similar thing happen when I had my youngest 6 months ago. His brother was 19 months at the time and had been weaned since 11 months but when he saw the new baby nursing he wanted to also. I let him and he tried for about 2 min and laughed and ran away....he has never asked since. Maybe just let him try and he can decide if he wants to continue or not.
sounds like what my 2.5 year old did when ds was born! I weaned her during the pregnancy but afterwards she still wanted to give it a go. She didnt know how to latch right and she gave it up after a minute or two. But since I let her, she didnt feel jealous of the baby doing it.
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Old 03-10-2012, 09:23 PM   #7
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

My 3 yr old dd does the same thing when she sees my 9 week old nurse. She tries to latch on, smiles and runs away. I think she just wants to see if I will let her.
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Old 03-11-2012, 09:21 AM   #8
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

I don't consider any baby under 3 wanting to nurse a regression in any way. Only you can decide if you're comfortable with this and at what age you feel "done".
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Old 03-12-2012, 10:54 AM   #9
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Re: Should I let my toddler nurse too

I know that a child nursing under age 2 isn't really regression. I just feel that once a child has given something up and moved on to a more advanced and skilled way to do something, that going back is considered regression. Kind of like, if a baby walks early at 10 months, then at 12 months starts wanting to crawl again, you would encourage them to keep walking like they were, even though it is normal for some babies not to walk clear up to 16 months. So that's kind of how I was looking at it. He hasn't asked today, but I think I will do like some of you others did, and let him try and see if he is even interested. Thanks for all the help mama's!!
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