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Old 07-14-2012, 07:02 PM   #11
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Re: Intact help!

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I haven't showed him how to retract and clean it so he doesn't usually. He does play with it in the bath and there's always soap in the water though. I thought it may be my fault for not making sure he cleaned it well since he is retractable at such an oddly early age (he's been fully retractable for a while, a year maybe) or that he got dirt trapped from constantly playing with it and he's almost always naked at home.
Dirt would be hard pressed to get in there, as the foreskin is designed to keep it out, but even so it will work its way out, I am betting it is soap irritation. My son was able to retract a little before 3 (way earlier than I thought he would, my nephew was 12 and my brother was 7 or 8). Recently I saw him retract in exploration (totally normal - it is like God's greatest gift to boys, the best "toy" ever, 'cause it feels so good!) and I was amazed at how dark red/purple his glans appeared. Totally normal, not irritated.

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Old 07-14-2012, 07:13 PM   #12
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Re: Intact help!

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Dirt would be hard pressed to get in there, as the foreskin is designed to keep it out, but even so it will work its way out, I am betting it is soap irritation. My son was able to retract a little before 3 (way earlier than I thought he would, my nephew was 12 and my brother was 7 or 8). Recently I saw him retract in exploration (totally normal - it is like God's greatest gift to boys, the best "toy" ever, 'cause it feels so good!) and I was amazed at how dark red/purple his glans appeared. Totally normal, not irritated.
I let them play with shaving cream "paint" (food coloring) but that was a couple of days ago and he just now complained about it tonight. I guess it could have been that, but they've had colored bath stuff before. I'll see how it looks when he wakes up and if he's still saying it hurts.
I'm mostly mad because my DH and all of his family were very angry with me for not letting them get circ'd. They will want to make a huge deal about this and want me to get the new baby circ'd in Oct. Heck, they wanted me to circ DS1 when he was almost 2 and his brother was born, take them both in together.
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Old 07-14-2012, 07:15 PM   #13
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Please read the above link, he does not need to retract to clean. Just as we don't wash the inside of a girl's vagina, the glans (head) of the penis is an internal organ. Retraction is a function for intercourse. Simply because the foreskin has separated does not mean that retraction is necessary for cleaning. Intact = do not retract - only clean what is seen. Until he hits puberty and smegma production ramps up and the opening of the foreskin has widened in response to hormones, he needs only to clean the outside, not retract.
Not sure why you wrote it like that. I was agreeing with you. He doesnt need soap and at most can rinse it. I didnt say he needed to or should. If you read the post you quoted of mine you would see I mentioned that we dont put soap in our vaginas so we dont need to clean under foreskin with soap.

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Old 07-14-2012, 07:19 PM   #14
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Re: Intact help!

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I was amazed at how dark red/purple his glans appeared. Totally normal, not irritated.
I was too the first time I saw him do it. This isn't just the head of the penis though, the foreskin covering it is red and irritated. I didn't even get a good look underneath yet. I know it's irritated because he's saying it hurts and wouldn't wear underwear to bed or even cover with a blanket.
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Old 07-15-2012, 08:07 PM   #15
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Re: Intact help!

Could it be yeast? Does the skin look dry or flaky, or is it just red? It can be painful when the skin cracks, or he could be interpreting/articulating itching as pain.

He could easily have played a little too rough with it too. If he's not feverish, in agony, or showing outward signs of infection (like offensive discharge), I'd let him try soaking in some warm water with baking soda tomorrow. That seems to work well for us when DS gets some occasional irritation on the tip of his foreskin. I've also heard a few drops of lavender essential oil is safe, soothing, and promotes healing in situations like this, though we've never tried it.

From what you describe it doesn't sound too serious, fortunately. I'm sorry your little guy is in pain -- it's just a sensitive area, but most little owies doen there will heal without incident. If anyone in your family says anything unkind about it, I would recommend one of two courses of action: Tell them to stuff it unless they want you to harass them every time one of their intact daughters (or circ'ed sons) has a problem, or ask if they really think it's better for any irritation and injury he might experience to occur directly on the head of his penis instead. But I'm not known for being terribly diplomatic in these situations.
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