Coach-abilty

[Geckmumto3]

Do you think coach-ability can be learned or taught? Our DD seems entirely un-coach-able. She is passionate about some things (horses, swimming), but only to the extent to get what she wants. She has always struggled with listening skills and as she ages, this is turning into un-coach-ability in coachable activities. DH and I have discussed how and if we can help her with this trait, and DH (who is a coach) feels you cannot really teach coach-ability.

Well, tonight, for the first time, she failed a swimming level. It doesn't matter to her that she has always been consistently 3-4 years younger than every kid in her class. It doesn't matter that I have explained to her that she will max out (due to age requirements) at a certain point and would just have to swim for the club or the team for a few years. What matters, surprisingly to this "un-coach-able" kid is that she didn't get the level. I feel mean because I feel this is a golden opportunity. Perhaps a little heartbreak will make her try harder, be more precise and attempt to be more coachable next time around.

So, is coach-ability inborn or can we learn it?