got a middle schooler?

[debmom2boyz]

I have an 8th grader, boy...soon to be 14....it is only 10 am and he's already had two meltdowns....regarding his homework/grades. Really? I don't care if he gets a C or D if he truly didn't understand the material--but not turning in work...really??????

(he just pulled out his binder--oh my---looks like we'll be cleaning that thing out).

Anyone else relate?

[l_Kimmie_l]

My son was a huge perfectionist (still is) when he was in middle school. He HAD to have straight A's. We never required it. His OCD was really bad in middle school. He would have fits if his work was not perfect. He has relaxed alot since middle school. He is in high school now. He still likes to get only As but does not have the fits if he does not now.

[MrsTorres]

My 13 year old is the same way, and so is my 12 year old. I have no advice, Im trying to get mine to understand they have to turn the stuff in too. I basically told both of mine that if they don't do the work they're in trouble and if they do the work and dont turn it in and get a bad grade they're in trouble..so far this week they've turned everything in (this was prompted after I got progress reports from both showing they're either not doing it at all or not turning it in).

[luvsviola]

I am a middle school teacher. Email his teachers. Ask for a parent/team meeting. If you show that you are happy to work with them, they can be your best ally.

Ask for a daily tracking sheet to be initialed by the teachers every class.

Get him dividers and help him organize his binder. Go to school and help him clean out his locker. Mentor him on being organized. Most kids struggle with that. The work is done, but its in the locker, at home, etc. If the binder is organized, there is no excuse for work not to be turned in.

This is typical 8th grade boy, but there are things you can do to make it stop too.\\

Every missing assignment=chores helps a lot!

[happysmileylady]

Yeah, my 17 yr old still melts down like once a week about her grades.

[~Laura~]

Do you have Focus or a Parent Portal? You could check every day and give reminders. I agree with the PP about helping him get organized. It does seem like lots of kids are disorganized at that age. But, you can help him learn good habits, it takes time.

[cobbermama]

Originally Posted by luvsviola I am a middle school teacher. Email his teachers. Ask for a parent/team meeting. If you show that you are happy to work with them, they can be your best ally. Ask for a daily tracking sheet to be initialed by the teachers every class. Get him dividers and help him organize his binder. Go to school and help him clean out his locker. Mentor him on being organized. Most kids struggle with that. The work is done, but its in the locker, at home, etc. If the binder is organized, there is no excuse for work not to be turned in. This is typical 8th grade boy, but there are things you can do to make it stop too.\\ Every missing assignment=chores helps a lot!

Also a middle school teacher, and I totally agree with all of this.

I send home weekly letters to be signed by parents, too, for missing assignments. I have one family who started charging their child his weekly allowance to get their signature on his letter. Guess who hasn't had a missing assignment since that started??

[iris0110]

I have a 12 year old who home schools and we have this problem. It isn't exactly that he doesn't turn in his work (where would he lose it, we're at home) he just sits staring at the wall or playing with crayons or arguing with his brother ect ect. The other day I actually caught him drawing on the wally instead of working. I don't know what gets into them at this age. I hate to say it but I actually feel better hearing that other kids have these same issues, I thought it was just him (he has some special needs). We spent the last two weeks taking a break and working on just getting basic self care stuff done in a timely manner. It didn't all go as I had planned. *sigh