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Old 05-14-2013, 12:15 PM   #1
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How much hitting is normal?

I'm curious how much other toddler boys hit? My little guy is 22 months and has been hitting. I'm getting some pressure like this is a problem and he's aggressive, but then I read that it's normal. Like how many times a day would you say a child this age would hit? He doesn't really do it when he's mad, it's more likely when he's trying to engage someone in play. We do "nice hands" and he gets time outs and I think it helps but isn't perfect.

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Old 05-14-2013, 12:21 PM   #2
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My DDs had days/weeks of hitting constantly. I think its probably normal. Stick to your guns and you will see improvements, but to some degree they also have to grow out of it.
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Old 05-14-2013, 01:54 PM   #3
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Re: How much hitting is normal?

Lots of hitting is totally normal. It's also totally appropriate to address it with consequences. Just because something is age appropriate doesn't mean it doesn't need to be addressed.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:11 PM   #4
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Oh yeah, I didn't mean I wouldn't address it! It's more like I don't think it's so crazy to have to be addressing it. Like I don't feel like every time I see this person that I should have to hear what I need to be doing different or better. He hits maybe 2-5 times a day and I put him in time out and I don't think she needs to be analyzing what we must have done wrong that is causing this. I also don't think she needs to make such a big deal about how he's "aggressive". I think it's normal and we're handling it and its just part of life.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:25 PM   #5
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My son is 22 months and his hitting is pretty constant. He's always been very physical but it is definitely ratcheting up lately. It's completely unwelcome. My daughter at this age never hit. It's a new normal for me.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:25 PM   #6
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Re: How much hitting is normal?

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Originally Posted by AngelElle View Post
Oh yeah, I didn't mean I wouldn't address it! It's more like I don't think it's so crazy to have to be addressing it. Like I don't feel like every time I see this person that I should have to hear what I need to be doing different or better. He hits maybe 2-5 times a day and I put him in time out and I don't think she needs to be analyzing what we must have done wrong that is causing this. I also don't think she needs to make such a big deal about how he's "aggressive". I think it's normal and we're handling it and its just part of life.
Well if he's hitting 2 to 5 times a day, that is "aggressive" IMO. That doesn't mean you did anything wrong or that he's not acting his age. Some people seem to think that if you just discipline the right way that kids won't misbehave. And that's simply not true, all kids misbehave, in all sorts of different ways. So no, it's not crazy to have to be addressing it, cause it's totally age appropriate. You just keep addressing it until he gets it.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:31 PM   #7
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Re: How much hitting is normal?

Pretty normal as others have mentioned. I think you are doing fine. Next time someone says something rude just say you are counting your blessings. Biting is a normal reaction at that age as well. You are just thankful it is hitting and not biting. By the way my middle child was both a hitter and a biter. My neice would hit and scratch. It wasn't fun at all. It just happens with no fault to the parents. Some kids just react physically rather than verbally which I don't necessarily think makes them agressive kids. I have met some very agressive children and 2-5 times a day hitting would have been a drastic improvement.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:48 PM   #8
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Re: How much hitting is normal?

Hitting is normal but it sounds like you're addressing it. One thing I will say is boys are rough by nature. I think it helps if you have someone safe he can be rough with--usually the dad. If they are allowed to play aggressively and wrestle around, then it seems to get some of that out and they can control themselves better when being rough is not appropriate. I know not everyone agrees, but boys and girls are wired differently....boys need more time to run, jump, play, wrestle and be wild. Our society in general is geared more towards little girl's needs, who are usually much more capable of being calm for longer time frames. So I think if you teach him that sometimes this behavior is okay, but only in xyz circumstances you will all be better off.
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