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Old 08-31-2013, 11:16 AM   #1
chandni3
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Can having kids be addicting?

I hate being pregnant, but soon after I have the little one is in my arms, I'm pining for another one. I just love being a mom. I knew I'd love it, but I didn't know I'd love it so much. In fact, now with two, only 18 months apart I love it even more and I think it's a great age difference, so much so I'm hoping that I can have another one soon (though I'll have to take our finances into consideration).
I love everything about being a mom, even the screaming tantrums, the poopy diapers, the food on the walls. Well, it's not that I love, them, but they just don't faze me. Maybe I just have good kids (my 3 month old suddenly started sleeping 9 hours straight at night). Am I crazy to want another one so close together? Will I regret it? I just wish there was a way to ensure I don't get so sick when pregnant. That's the hardest part, I wouldn't be able to do daycare or care for my kids well and it puts a lot of stress on our marriage as my husband gets frustrated having to do all the housework. I also think the fact that I'm going to be 32 next month and it took two years to conceive my daughter (though my son was conceived on just one act of intimacy) makes me want to not wait too long. I don't want to waist any time in case we face issues conceiving again. My husband wants 4 children. I wanted 4 too but now I want 5 I'm already picking out names lol

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Old 08-31-2013, 06:53 PM   #2
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

I don't know if it's addicting, I suppose it could be, but I think you are riding a hormone high. And, I don't mean that in a bad way. I'm not insulting you. I have totally felt that way. And at 36, I feel the clock ticking even louder. I wish I hadn't waited so long between my kids.
The morning sickness thing is tough. No doubt about it. You can look at it 2 ways. Have bunch all together and get all the sickness over with, or space them out to give your husband and family a break from the sickness sometimes.
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Old 09-03-2013, 07:14 PM   #3
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Hi! I understand how you feel.

I have had hyperemesis with all 4 of my kids, though the 4th wasn't quite as bad. I am pregnant when the last baby is 17-19mos old because we've never prevented and my cycle returns at about 15mos postpartum and then a long cycle and then back to normal. I always told hubby I wanted 4 kids, but he was ok with two and came around to 4. Baby #4 is 8 weeks old, and now we're both floundering about whether to prevent or not. My gut tells me no, because I am against birth control for myself, and because now that we have 4, I would love to have more. I do think I should lose a little more weight between babies but therein lies the cushion that sustains us when I can't keep down much food or water for weeks!

So...I guess what I'm getting at is, the sickness & stress is worth it to me, but you have to decide if you're up for it, and make sure that your hubby is, too! Time will tell if my hubby is on board or not.
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Old 09-03-2013, 07:27 PM   #4
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

I feel like once they hit 2.5- 3 things get a lot harder. You may find once your older one gets a little older you are feeling a little apprehension about another one so soon. I absolutely loved the phase my son was in from about 18 months to 2.5. A few months before our second was born was when things got a bit harder. He was 2 years 8 months when we had our second. Things seem to be leveling off a bit now, he's 3 years and 3 months. Plus when your littler one gets more mobile and as the older one gets a bit more opinionated it can become more challenging. My newest one (7.5 months) was really easy until about 4 months - was a really great sleeper, but not anymore now that the teeth are coming in!
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Old 09-04-2013, 08:52 PM   #5
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

I totally understand! I love, love, love being a mom to babies and my heart aches at the thought of that ending. Finances play a huge part in my thinking but what makes I even harder is we have frozen embryos just waiting to be given the chance to be born an he thought of letting them go just breaks my heart. At the same time I feel each additional child spreads me that much thinner for each child. Is it selfish to have more?
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Old 09-04-2013, 09:19 PM   #6
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

Well it does sound like you love the baby time frame and that is very cool. not every mom handles those transitions well. but like you said, having a baby is about more than just how you feel in that "baby moon". Its about real stuff like jobs, siblings, finances, marriage. Its not selfish to have more but the reality is, each of your other children and each part of the rest of your life WILL have less of you. As a mom of four under 6, I would suggest that if you arent sure yet, just wait it out, even a few more months to see how you and hubby feel and really consider the reality of all of this. Give your current baby as much attention and love as you can because as soon as you get pregnant with a third, thats less of you for every other person in your life, including yourself. If you dont feel good and you are juggling daycare and a million other things, each pregnancy becomes more stressful and you arent able to enjoy the current baby as much. Take your time. 32 is by no means too old to have a baby and giving your body a break between pregnancies is a good idea as well. My kids are 20 months, 22 months, 18 month age gaps. I honestly wish that I would have given a solid 24 months if not more between each age gap. And IMO, kids do not get easier. you just trade crying for screaming and then to whining and then to sassiness. being a mom is hard to kids of any age.
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Old 09-05-2013, 11:52 AM   #7
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

i hope you get to soak it up and really enjoy right where you are with those two little ones
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Old 09-05-2013, 11:53 AM   #8
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

i agree- being on the same page in marriage is key.
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Old 09-05-2013, 11:55 AM   #9
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

that sounds like good advice. encouraging!
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Old 09-05-2013, 06:55 PM   #10
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Re: Can having kids be addicting?

We're not rushing anything yet. I plan to breastfeed my son exclusively longer than I did my daughter. I got my period back at about 7 months with her just after I started solids. Anyway, my husband is really busy with work and always too tired to dtd. I just love being a mom so much. I also do daycare so I know what it's like having more children around though it's not exactly the same of course as your own. I am enjoying and soaking up every moment with my son. Two years apart would probably be better. We'll see. I just can't believe how much I love having two.
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