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Old 08-18-2006, 09:50 AM   #1
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How soon for a road trip?

Okay mommas.. here's the deal. My DH has an aunt that I've only met once... and we've been married for 4 years. SHe live about an hour and a half from us.. and she wants to see the baby. So, my wonderful DH suggests to his aunt that we go to see her (and yes, she is fully capable of driving out here)....well, we had our first "long" trip (45 minutes away) for my MIL's birthday on Monday and it was a level disaster.. I landed up having to nurse in teh car all during our fancy dinner because people were staring at my screaming boy. Sam usually sleeps during the day and is up almost all of the night... I take care of him in hte living room so my DH can sleep and go to work in the mornings... so DH has NO IDEA how much work he is at night time.

At any rate.. DH never ASKED me about going on another long road trip with Sam. So, now that's he's contacted his aunt and set up a time to go, he's asked me.. and he's mad that I don't want to go. Sams 6 weeks old today... and I'm just not comfortable nursing him in weird places yet. I'm pretty sure he'd do fine in the car, but it's just MY confidence in taking care of him that far away yet. Not to mention the gas to and fro.. and feeling obliged to get home rather than take in some shopping. I know that motherhood shouldn't make me feel like I can't do those things--I'm just not confident enough yet... I know we'll be able to pull a trip like that off SOME DAY. I mean.. isn't it common curtisty for family to come TO the baby.. rather than ask mama and baby to come to them???

I guess I just needed to vent. WHen was the youngest you took a long trip with DC? Any tips for survival? I always nurse him for along period of time before we leave to "tank him up"... but I just get so nervous outside the home yet. Please tell me I'm not alone in this. I just haven't gotten much sleep due to taking care of DS 18 out of 24 hours in a day (DH does help when he gets home from work) so I"mnot sure if Im being reasonable... it seems like DH doesn't think I am...

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Old 08-18-2006, 09:59 AM   #2
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Re: How soon for a road trip?

we drove from atlanta to san antonio (about 1000 miles - 2 days) when molly was about 8 weeks old. she slept a lot of the time. for her the carseat was magic = very sleepy. actually the biggest problem we had was that she doesn't nurse very well while traveling so i got somewhat engorged (so i would suggest bringing along a small manual pump or something to do some hand expressing into/onto). she made up for it at night though.

it's never easy to travel with a small child, but as long as your kiddo likes the carseat ok, now is by far the easiest time for car trips, imo. as for the experience on the other end - i would say if you can give you & dc a chance to adjust/unwind a bit before a ton of people descend upon you. also was there not a spare bedroom that you could have nursed in rather than in the car? that's what i always did - when things got to be too much for Molly or for me was to go hide out for a little while.

katie

eta - oh yes, i should also mention we NEVER try to make it all in one day if it's on the longish side - a good night's sleep is worth the hotel bill to us.
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Old 08-18-2006, 10:11 AM   #3
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Re: How soon for a road trip?

Oh see.. we were at a fancy resturaunt when Sam had a meltdown--so we had to go out to the car. I know NIP will get easier.. I'm just NOT ready for it, KWIM? LOL.... and the family has decended and gone away long ago... they were all here when he was brand new.

And the trip is only an hour and a half away.. but man, it seems far away. It's great that for the most part he's alright with his carseat.. it doesn't do the magic trick of getting him asleep.. but he tolerates it for a little while. But...even if it does put him to sleep and he sleeps the whole trip..that means momma's got hell to pay at night time. Ugh.

Anyone else?
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Old 08-18-2006, 10:15 AM   #4
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Re: How soon for a road trip?

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Originally Posted by Manna00
Oh see.. we were at a fancy resturaunt when Sam had a meltdown--so we had to go out to the car. I know NIP will get easier.. I'm just NOT ready for it, KWIM? LOL.... and the family has decended and gone away long ago... they were all here when he was brand new.

And the trip is only an hour and a half away.. but man, it seems far away. It's great that for the most part he's alright with his carseat.. it doesn't do the magic trick of getting him asleep.. but he tolerates it for a little while. But...even if it does put him to sleep and he sleeps the whole trip..that means momma's got hell to pay at night time. Ugh.

Anyone else?

ah - i can see the issue of restaurant unhappiness then. sorry - missed that bit. well, i guess if it was me in a similar situation it would really boil down to whether i wanted to attend the event/visit the person(s) on the other end then.
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Old 08-18-2006, 12:06 PM   #5
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Re: How soon for a road trip?

Ian was born Nov 20 and we went up to my mom's (3 hour trip) for New Years - so about the same age as your little one. I nursed right when before we walked out the door and as soon as we got to mom's I said "Hi! Love you all, but I gotta get nursing before we can be friendly!" and just walked in and let DH be social while I tended to baby. I suggest you do the same thing. You have a little baby, and by golly feeding him comes before socializing! I'm sure the aunt will understand!

I'd just walk in, give her a hug, and ask if you can borrow her spare bedroom for a few minutes to nurse. I'm sure she'll understand! Babies gotta eat!

Try not to stress over it too much - you're probably anticipating it being much worse than it actually will be.
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Old 08-18-2006, 12:18 PM   #6
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Re: How soon for a road trip?

hahaha.... 8 days... took a road trip from Ft. Benning GA to Ft. Irwin, CA. Roughly 2600 miles, 5 days. Drove 10 hrs a day (yes, I drove my truck while DH drove his car). But we had no choice so there's a difference.

If it's just the nursing confidence, you'll have to either steadily overcome that in your time or put it aside. Most of the time, people don't notice or don't care but it's the mama's perception that half the world is staring. I understand the new mama agnst about nursing in strange places. I'm a very experienced nursing mama and I still have my moments where I'd just rather be at home for nursing.

Don't be hard on yourself and talk to your DH about not going. If you really, really feel uncomfortable and just the mere thought of the trip is making you stressed... it's possibly a sign that it's not the right time to "deal with it." kwim? And sometimes, jumping in with both feet and eyes closed is a good way to stop worrying about something. Instead of worrying so much about the temperature of the water, you find out that the water is very warm... and you start to relax and not worry so much about it.

good luck and don't worry... you're not alone!!!
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