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Old 08-26-2010, 07:20 AM   #1
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How old was your child when you left him overnight?

So- I have a buisness conference coming up and I am super anxious about it. My dd is 18 months and I have never been away from her at night. She just stopped nursing about 2 weeks ago so I have been exclusively putting her to sleep since she has been born. Also my dh has a back problem and can't hold or lift dd for a long time. My mom has offered to come to our house and stay with dd (she watches her 20 hours a week while I work and my daughter LOVES my mom) but still has never put her to sleep. To make it worse, my dd is a terrible sleeper- still getting up 1-2 times a night- ugh.

So my husband (and myself) are really anxious about me leaving. I will be away only 2 nights and be back late the 3rd night. What should I expect? What would be some good ways to prepare for my leaving? Unfortunately dh can't lift her to put her in the crib so I can't ask him to start putting her to sleep. Any suggestions?
Thanks!

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Old 08-26-2010, 07:25 AM   #2
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

Our kids have all been between 2-2.5 when we left them overnight anywhere. Maybe your mom could come over a couple nights before you have to leave to get the baby to sleep, and you and DH could leave the house during the time (think date night!) so they can be alone but you are close by in case it doesn't go well.

Oh is your DH staying home or going with you? If he is staying home he can get her to sleep and then sleep with her. Do that a few times before you leave. That would be easier on everyone and wouldn't require your mom (and your) routine to be entirely disrupted.
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Old 08-26-2010, 08:28 AM   #3
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

First time DS stayed overnight with somebody that wasn't us was when I was in the hospital having his sister, he was 2.5. My sister came and stayed at our house with him. He's spent the night at my youngest sister's house once and has been brought home from failed overnight attempts a couple times with her. About once every couple months he asks to stay at my other sister's house and he always, without fail, wants to come home between midnight and 1am.

DD is 27 months and has never spent the night away from me or DH...she's a super clingy momma's girl and I'm lucky if I can leave her with DH to go grocery shopping without her freaking out to the point of making herself throw up--which she does very easily, he doesn't just let her cry until she pukes...when she gets mad she puts her fingers down her throat to gag herself until she throws up
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Old 08-26-2010, 08:30 AM   #4
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

13 months...she was still nursing though. I just pumped a lot and she took bottles. She stayed overnight with my mom lots of times (mom is daycare) if we were over there and it was her bedtime. It is silly to wake her up at 6:30 am when she could just stay there and sleep later.
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Old 08-26-2010, 02:12 PM   #5
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

DS1 was 6 months the first time- he stayed with my mom. I was EPing at the time so feeding wasn't a big deal. DS2 is 7 months and EBF. I don't think he could handle it right now. If we tried to give him a bottle in the middle of the night I think he'd wake right up. DS1 has only spent the night away from us 2x and the second was at 18 months. He and my mom made a pallet on the floor and he slept great next to her. Now if I need help my mom will come over to our house so we don't have to take all the gear. She has put both boys down with success but we joke that she is the 'baby whisperer'. I couldn't leave them for a long period of time with anyone but my mom but I trust her completely.
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Old 08-26-2010, 02:22 PM   #6
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

DS1 had just turned two when I left him with my mom overnight. DH's co-workers bought us a night at the local B&B for our anniversary. It was literally just 5 minutes away from my mom's house. AND we had been living with my mom so DS was totally comfortable with her, AND she respects my parenting style and wishes so I could trust her 100%.

The next time I left DS1 overnight was about 4 months later when his brother was born and I spent 2 nights at the hospital. The first night spent with my husband's grandmother, the second with my dad and step mom at my house.

I have not left him overnight since. DS2 is almost 3 and i haven't left him overnight yet, and the same for DS3 who is 6 months.

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Old 08-26-2010, 02:28 PM   #7
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

DS stayed overnight with my mom for the first time at 4 months old. DD stayed overnight with my mom (for the one and only time) when she was 2 1/2.
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Old 08-26-2010, 02:31 PM   #8
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

The first time my daughter was ever away from me was at the end of January of this year (she was 2 1/2 exactly). I was hospitalized and she stayed with my friend and her family.

The second time was when she was 2y8.5m and she stayed with my mom's best friend (in another state) and her family for about 2 weeks, while I was in the hospital, again.

The third time was a couple of weekends ago, she stayed with my dad and stepmom (in another state) for the weekend, b/c I had to work and couldn't find a local babysitter.
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Old 08-26-2010, 02:31 PM   #9
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

DS1 was 25 months and 1 week when he spent his first night away from me at his dad's house.

DD was 14 months and 3 weeks when she spent her first two nights away from me while I was having DS2 in the hospital.

DS2 was 21 months and 3 weeks when he spent his first 3 nights away from me-in his own house with his two older siblings and grandparents.


My friend who watched DD slept with her in her (friend's) bed. She was fine as long as she had someone to snuggle with. DS2 was going through a rough patch with night wakings. My parents did their best with him. He was just "as bad" for us as he was for them. He was also nursing and still interested when I came back.
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Old 08-26-2010, 02:34 PM   #10
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Re: How old was your child when you left him overnight?

I think my daughter was around 10 months when she first spent the night at my mom's. She does it every week on the same night so it's really become routine for her. In your shoes...I would have her spend the night at your moms since your mom has probably at least put her down for naps? So there will be some familiarity there. And you could do one trial night before you leave, or just let it happen the way it will.
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