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Old 08-01-2011, 12:29 AM   #21
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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Haha, one of our first home videos (with those huge, clunky 80's cameras) was my second birthday and it was 101 Dalmations themed...the cake, the toys, the favors, my outfit. Your DD has good taste
her first obsession was monkeys and now it's darn dalmations, which she refers to a "ca, ca" (cat) even though it's a dog lol

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Old 08-01-2011, 11:58 AM   #22
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I think that no matter what you decide, there are sacrifices to be made and thoughts of the greener grass on the other side. Plus I can bet you that there are a lot of SAHMs that are not cut out to be so or would rather work and would never admit the truth because that admission may be judged harshly. One thing I know for sure is that being a parent is HARD and so much harder than a non-parent can imagine so each choice, like whether or not to return to work, can be very complicated. Don't forget too that this particular site caters to a certain type of mom and most (of course not all) moms that are very into attachment or natural parenting choices also go hand in hand with other choices like being a SAHM, homeschooling, etc. You don't really get a full range of ideas from this site usually so if you really want to explore your choices and others' experiences, you really should talk to more people or become a part of other parenting sites.
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Old 08-01-2011, 06:14 PM   #23
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

i love being a WOHM, but i have a rather unique situation. i work for the fire dept, so i have 24 hour shifts, meaning my work week is only 2 days even though it's 48 hours. i love my work....it's exciting and no 2 days are the same. plus, some days i really do get to make a difference in someone's life. one of my shifts, the kids go to the babysitter while dh is at work, and the other shift they have just with dh. it's nice because they get their own alone time with dh. and because of the way my schedule works, i also get to (sort of) be a SAHM. working gives me just enough of a "break" that i don't get burned out at home. i don't think i could say the same though if i had to work a regular 9-5 job.
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Old 08-01-2011, 07:53 PM   #24
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I have done both, and I prefer working out of home. I don't regret the 14 months I stayed home with my twins, but when the job offer came around I was ready to take it. I feel like I know how to be a good mom for infants, but I'm not cut out for toddlerhood. I lost patience easily and counted down the hours till DH came home and I could take a break. If one of them didn't take a nap, it would seriously ruin my whole day. I feel terrible saying this but it was liberating to hand my toddlers over to a professional child care person each morning and zoom off to work and adult land.

When I got pg with baby #3, DH even asked me, "you're going to keep working right?" he followed up with something to the effect of, I didn't seem happy staying home last time. How nice of him not to come right out and say I was a total b----, I'm pretty sure that's what he meant.

I think part of why I like working is because i feel like I'm on more equal footing with DH. When I stayed home full time I think we both expected me to do all the night time parenting etc. I did get to a point where I felt really resentful.

Also I have a nice part time situation. It's a really good balance for me.

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Old 08-01-2011, 10:52 PM   #25
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I love being a WOHM. When DS was itty bitty it was hard to leave him, and even now some days when I drop him off and he's sad to leave mama it's hard, but he loves school/daycare and being home alone with him more than a few days per week would be pretty hard for me. I love my career, too, and can't wait until he's old enough to talk about science with me . Full time WOHM is working for me but if we could afford it I'd probably go part time (especially when he's older and in school).
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Old 08-01-2011, 11:24 PM   #26
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I love being a WOHM, but my job is certainly my passion and on top of that I am so fortunate that my DH is a SAHD, so I know when I am at work that my DS is taken care of, no questions, no worries about my cases going late. It is hard that my hubby gets to see milestones that I don't and since DS is still EBF it's really hard (a 6 hour surgery is difficult!!) but at least for me my profession is a large part of who I am and I can't imagine trying to be a mama and not be who I am.
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Old 08-02-2011, 03:06 AM   #27
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The only problem I have with being a WOHM is finding reliable childcare. As long as that is taken care of, I'm just fine as a WOHM.
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Old 08-02-2011, 05:04 AM   #28
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.
This exactly. I think I am a better parent because I have my time do work at a profession that I love (pharmacist) and when I get home, the kids are happy to see me and we spend quality time together.
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Old 08-02-2011, 05:13 AM   #29
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

I totally thought that I'd LOVE LOVE LOVE staying at home FT which I have been for the first time since January. I was always working at least PT before, although sometimes it was from home.

And guess what? I'm bored. I'm going back to school. So I still won't work in the new career field for a few years, but I'm definitely planning to go back and I needed something to stretch my mind. Being a SAHM mom makes me feel like my brain is dying. That may not be a popular opinion, but for me it's true.

I really enjoy my time with my babies, but I'm happier when I have a job. I always liked being able to look forward to coming home to my family.
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Old 08-02-2011, 10:00 AM   #30
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Re: Does anyone actually LIKE being a WOHM?

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I love my job and love working, but I would definitely like to spend more time with my son. I don't think I'm cut out to be a SAHM because I think I'd go a little nuts.
Exactly. Me too. I would like more time with my kids, but I love working too. I think being a part-time WOHM would be perfect for me.

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I'm wondering if there's a difference between moms who are working in a chosen profession, specifically when they've gone to college & possibly grad school & have a few years of experience & an already established career, even if they don't love the specific job they have right now (this is me), & moms who are working solely to pay the bills, regardless of the job qualifications.
I wonder this too. I went to college and received my degree in chemistry specifically to work in science. And now I work in science. If I hated my job or was doing something just because it paid the bills, I would feel much differently about being a WOHM. But I am doing what I wanted to do, so I'm happy to be working. I will say that I am working in a different field of science than I would if I was never going to have kids. Right now I work somewhere where I am not working on research or trying to advance my career in a competitive way. I might have pursued those things if I didn't have kids. But my priorities now are having a job I like that affords time for family. And so I work somewhere I enjoy, but is also lower stress, predictable hours, and family-friendly. I'm not much for the rat race anyways.

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