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Old 08-05-2012, 04:28 PM   #11
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As long as he hasn't made an appt for the big V, don't worry yet. My hubs was so against another baby. I lost a pregnancy in '09 & '10. He knew I desperately wanted a daughter so he held off getting fixed. After I lost the baby in '10 he said he was done D.O.N.E. For realz. He said he as getting a vasectomy then didn't. He did however insist we abstain. For 6 months we barely touched. He slept in the guest room. One night he decided he needed it. He was too lazy to find a condom. I got pregnant that night. I never got my daughter (I got a tubal after Ds3 was born) but I did get my final rainbow baby & my hubs is madly in love with him.

My point is just relax. You still have time to sway him, but don't mention it for a bit. Good luck.

Jodie ~ wife & mama

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Old 08-13-2012, 11:09 PM   #12
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

Hugs! That is really hard. We want to have a large family too. The way I look at it..my kids won't be expensive as teens b/c I know that my SO will insist they gets jobs for if they want to buy stuff (he worked from 14) and we have no intentions to pay for college. I also try to think about how I want my life to be far down the road..50, 60, 70, etc...I know I will want to have as much fmaily around as possible, as far as I'm concerned more children will only bring joy. Maybe try putting it like that?
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Old 09-04-2012, 03:58 PM   #13
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

We had 2 and had discussed a 3rd. He was 100% against it. But after a year long deployment to Iraq he changed his mind. We have 3 girls now, and just this weekend, he mentioned a slight desire for #4! And he stopped using the bc we'd been using since we started being intimate 12 years ago!

Not pg yet, but we're no longer preventing.

And I was ok either way- with a #4 or without. But I love the idea of #4.
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Old 09-05-2012, 02:20 PM   #14
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Hugs mama, I desperately want #2 and dh is fine with 1. Good luck.
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Old 01-07-2013, 12:16 PM   #15
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

Bless your hear! I was in the same boat as you...Hubby wanted 1 and I wanted 3, we have 2, a 7 year old and a 2 1/2 yr old. I still want my baby #3 and have fought and argued with hubby about it. After lots of restless nights on my part, I decided to write him a letter and poured my heart out in it since I am not really that good with verbalizing how I feel. Anyway, long story short, he didn't exactly say yes but he told me that my letter got him into thinking about that 3rd child and that we'll see and wait. So I got my mirena out just this morning and we will see what happens then. He was actually teasing me about it when I got back from my appmt saying that now that I don't have the protection of the iud I'm gonna want to it a lot (sorry TMI), lol.

Well, all I can say is good luck and hopefully he changes his mind.

Tiffany
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Old 01-09-2013, 07:57 PM   #16
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I am in the same boat. Dh says no more because we have two, fixing to be three girls. Hes open to adopting a boy though. Im kind of depressed this will likely be my last pregnancy. My hubs is a workaholic....hes also a reservist in the military and gone periodically, but a GREAT daddy when he is home. Hugs!
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Old 01-11-2013, 06:50 AM   #17
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

DH was in the "no more" camp too. I have gotten pregnant really easy in the past and we use condoms as BC because I can't take hormones. Our youngest is 2 and every month was an emotional roller coaster of wanting to be pregnant knowing there was a slight possibility (TMI: we never use a condom the entire time) and then being crushed when AF would arrive. I got really upset with him one night because he was determined to have no more but hadn't scheduled a "V" yet. I basically told him it was like dangling me on a string and he either had to go get the "V" and be done or decide that we could have one more. He finally confessed to me that he was afraid to get the "V" done. I told him that if we could have one more that I would get my tubes tied so he didn't have to get the "V". We decided that he would think about it and I wouldn't bring up another baby for 3months. This was in Oct.

FFwd to Jan. 2 and I brought it up again. He tried to blow me off and say he wasn't ready yet and I got mad again, once again dangling me on a string. We discussed: I don't need him to TTC right now, I just want him to say it's something we can do in the future. His company has routinely taken us on a big trip every other year and next Feb. is our year to go. They have always announced in March if there will be a trip or not. I don't want to have a NB or be too pregnant to go on the trip. DH has agreed to wait until April. If there is a trip we will wait to TTC Fall 2013 so I will be under 28weeks when we go on vacay and if the trip is someplace I don't want to be pregnant at we will wait to TTC until the trip. I'm perfectly great with that and am hoping he doesn't back out.
If there's no trip we could be TTC this spring
Regardless I'm just glad he's not scheduled the "V" and that he's talking TTC with me, vast improvement.
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Old 01-11-2013, 07:01 AM   #18
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

Not sure if you are a Christian, but if you are bring it to God, children are His blessings! I prayed and prayed for 6 years between 3 and 4 and God not only changed my husbands heart on having one more but changed us both and we are trusting Him to plan our family. Every child is a blessing.
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Old 01-11-2013, 02:25 PM   #19
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

I'm Christian and am on Mirena partially because of the need/insistance of hubby to have bc and because I don't have to deal with an 11 day mensus (TMI-sorry).
He has sort of started changing my mind about wanting another now. I'm still sad when I think about my baby #4 and when I look at the table and see the extra chair we will have (is that odd???). I let him know that I will always want another regardless of whether I'm pestering him or not and if he ever changes his mind, I'm all about having #4. It will make me kinda mad if he changes his mind when #3 is 4 or 5 years old though; having to go back to all the baby stuff after selling off everything.
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Old 01-28-2013, 09:35 PM   #20
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Re: How to convince dh to have another???

We were both "pretty sure" we were done. Enough that we gave away a lot of the baby stuff or semi-permanent loaned it to other people. But the "pretty sure" changed to "not so sure" and then to "why not" and then to "heck yeah!" So I ended up with that far apart spacing with a 9 year old, 6 year old, and a newborn. It was great for us though, the timing was what we needed it to be and the older girls are so helpful and sweet with the baby.

My DH was not on board to the idea as quickly as I was. But I didn't really have to convince him. I just told him how I felt and why I wanted to, and he agreed. Part of it was that my first two girls were early and when my second one was born she spent 23 days in the NICU. I was also pretty sick when I had her, so it really freaked my DH out. I think that when I made an appointment to discuss things with a high-risk OB before we even started trying, it eased his mind a lot. Fortunately, #3 was only a couple of weeks early and was a take-home baby right away!
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