oops double post

[faiths13]

double post

[lookatreestar]

How sad that they are so desperate for attention I have no advice as my kids are still babies

[TooBusyBearcubs]

Wow, mama. That is not cool! I'd tell him to quit giving them his info, for his own sake, you know?
I would have a little chat with the parents of the girl who was calling him at 11 at night. Sheesh!

[tallanvor]

Unfortunately, 11 yr old girls are like that. I know because I have one who is struggling with much right now, and doesn't have the relationship with her dad that she needs to get over the boy craziness. I firmly believe tfhat is the main cause of boy craziness -- relation with father.

Anyway, if your son doesn't like it, then he needs tto eiter block them, ignore them, or, y'all need to speak to the parents of the girls. And, your son should stop giving out his info.

[DalesWidda]

well, personally, as the mother of an 11 year old girl, I think that having a cell/facebook account at 11 is too young. Actually facebook is supposed to be 13 and older. Maybe if you limit the tech exposure that might help?

[ktmelody]

Originally Posted by DalesWidda well, personally, as the mother of an 11 year old girl, I think that having a cell/facebook account at 11 is too young. Actually facebook is supposed to be 13 and older. Maybe if you limit the tech exposure that might help?

I agree.

I wouldn't allow an 11 year old to have a FB account. My girls were just shy of 13 and 14 when they got theirs. Like a month shy of their bdays. It is really sad that 11 year old girls need that much attention and I am so glad my teenaged daughters are not like that at all. . I was starved for male attention and of course got pregnant as a teenager.

[faiths13]

i have talked to the parents of the couple of girls already. things died down for awhile. as far as the girl in the park, it was my idea to give her his number, because i thought he could hang out with the brother again as well. they seemed to hit it off. i didnt think it would mean her blowing up his phone day and night. he kept telling her he couldnt talk and she stopped calling after a week. i learned my lesson! as for FB, he doesnt really use it. he only friends ppl he knows, and he is using it to kit with friends from our old neighborhood we had to move from. the phone is supposed to be to talk to me and dh and other family mainly (which i have enforced for the most part, because he has limited minutes). i think the most prob comes from his ipod. he can text. face time, and chat on FB with it. but that is not why we got it for him or why he wanted it. he uses it alot to play games on. i want to teach him to be responsible and how to deal with this situations. it doesnt matter if i take the technology away - the girls are still going to want to fall all over him apparently.

i have been on his FB and looked through all his messages and been through the texts on his ipod. its all pretty innocent as far as whats said, its more of the frequency of the messages being sent to him. and really why the reaction from girls over him like this? sheesh! there have been 6 this year and like i said he hs.....it scares me to ever send him back to ps! lol

and like i said, he already got in trouble for playing "vampire" (translation:she was sucking his neck!) with his neighbor friend who is a girl. this was before the ipod and FB and cell phone. so its not the tech thats the prob necessarily. i think i just need to lock him away til he's 18. lol. i have a 13 yr old and he isnt even interested in girls right now.

[AfWife8405]

Originally Posted by DalesWidda well, personally, as the mother of an 11 year old girl, I think that having a cell/facebook account at 11 is too young. Actually facebook is supposed to be 13 and older. Maybe if you limit the tech exposure that might help?

I agree. I have FB, my hubby does not and he has stated (and I agree) our kids (when they are older) won't either. My ipod is about 5 years old, I didn't even know they made ones that text.

Originally Posted by faiths13 and like i said, he already got in trouble for playing "vampire" (translation:she was sucking his neck!) with his neighbor friend who is a girl. this was before the ipod and FB and cell phone. so its not the tech thats the prob necessarily. i think i just need to lock him away til he's 18. lol. i have a 13 yr old and he isnt even interested in girls right now.

Oh my! I would be upset that they were not being supervised!

[jamieism]

I can see why it would be irritating to have anybody calling your kid multiple times a day, but I also think that these girls - like most kids - are still learning social graces. Responses here seem awfully judgmental in oddly gendered ways. They seem to suggest that the problem isn't kids that are calling but that GIRLS are being socially proactive, pursuing, rather than pursued. I take issue with that. Clearly the girls need lessons in understanding social cues, but it's possible your DS may also need help in giving social cues that accurately reflect his interest. The whole "desperate for attention" judgment is creepy IMO. And playing vampire? Well first, DS was clearly participating, so it was either an innocent game - vampires do suck necks - and the response to it MADE it sexual, or there was an element of sexual exploration that was mutual. I don't see where the girl, specifically, is the problem and find it disturbing that others here do. These kinds of gendered judgment patterns (seeing and judging girls differently because they are girls) are what reinforces gender inequality and the over sexualization (as object, not actor) of girls and women. if they were boys, people might deplore their lack of social graces, but wouldn't be calling them "desperate for attention." if the genders were reversed, and it were boys calling a girl, no one would be calling the boys desperate for attention. This whole thread creeps me out.

Jamie. Anthropologist mama to three baby feminists, married to my best friend.

[danner]

Jamie, your reply is awesome. I think people have reacted to the girls of the story because the OP somehow thinks her boy is completely "innocent," yet is obviously immersed in adult media sanctioned by his parents and is somehow in touch with these kids.

OP, are you maybe a touch in denial about how much your son is being influenced by adult media and how much he is encouraging these villains, er, girls? I think you might be seeing them too much as sexual predators when they are probably just giggly girls.