Curious about fostering/adopting infants

[BeccaSueCongdon]

I'm curious to hear about anyone's experience with adopting an infant/newborn. From what I've heard, there is such a high demand for newborns that it's a very long wait. Just wondering what your experiences have been. Did you foster first? Did you find an agency that matches you with a

[newmommy13]

Its so variable, its specific to each county and agency. I have only been licensed since may and I am fostering a baby I picked up from the hospital at 2 days old. I thibk thats unusual on our county but clearly they dont have like a waitinf list for newborns or I would not have this one. I have no idea how or why our home was chosen. Seems completely random. I think its more unusual in our county to have newborns released right to foster care but another county in our state had so many they were calling to private agencies to place them as there were not enough foster homes to meet the demands.

I will add that the vast majority of newborns will be born with some exposure and many have scary withdrawals. Some counties offer special trainings on how to care for these little ones but I haven't come across any here but its only been a few months. There was a real chance our.dfd would have a withdrawal period and we were given no education on it at all. Other moms in my county have been very kind and helpful though and I felt I had the resources to handle it if we had a problem.

[BeccaSueCongdon]

That's helpful! I'll check into our county's information. I live in Multnomah County in Oregon, and I wouldn't be surprised if there is a significant amount of drug exposure. My kids are still very young. 4 (DS) and 16mo DD, so I think waiting a year or two would be best.

I wonder if people saying that it's hard to adopt newborns is because they don't want a newborn with drug exposure?

[luvbeingmomma]

We foster infants only and hope to adopt but realize that may never happen. We have been without a placement for 5 months.

[Amandamama]

This is an old thread, but I'll respond anyways. In our county, it's harder to find families who can foster newborns.. You need to have a stay at home parent since newborns can't go to daycare in NY till 6 weeks, so if you're both working, you won't get a newborn placed with you. Myself & 3 of my foster mama friends are SAHM so we get all the newborn foster care cases in our county.

[yellowitchgrl]

We've been fostering for over 5 years. The youngest child we've gotten was 2. We've never been asked to take an infant, even though that is our preference.

In our county it is nearly impossible, and I do mean that literally, to adopt an infant through foster care. I would guess they place an infant once every 3-ish years.

[Amandamama]

Wow,our county family judge is very conservative with infants and places them all the time... I know at least 10 newborns adopted in the last several years, one being ours... Well, by the time the adoption goes thu, they arent newborns anymore, but were placed into care directly from the hospital.

This summer, we were fostering a 2 yr old, and in one weeks time span, were asked to take on 3 different infants.

Our youngest son was placed with us at 8 months with severe special needs, we're currently fostering a 10 week old who I brought home from the hospital when he was born.

[yellowitchgrl]

I worded that badly. There are no infants here and very few children in general, but it's extremely rare to have infants. We have a lot of empty foster homes in our county.

[Amandamama]

Originally Posted by yellowitchgrl We've been fostering for over 5 years. The youngest child we've gotten was 2. We've never been asked to take an infant, even though that is our preference. In our county it is nearly impossible, and I do mean that literally, to adopt an infant through foster care. I would guess they place an infant once every 3-ish years.

Hmm,

I wonder what happens then with drug addicted newborns, newborns whose moms are in jail, or severely mentally retarded or with prior abuse charges? Or shaken baby cases? Are they not being placed in foster care? Or are u just in a really nice community without those issues?

That sounded snarky, but really, just curious

[Amandamama]

Oh, gotcha... Just not a lot of kids placed in care, that's a good thing really! Hard for foster parents who want to adopt, but great for families.

I always feel bad that I "want" kids to get placed so that well have them...