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Old 10-19-2012, 10:42 AM   #21
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

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Originally Posted by Mom2lucy View Post
I could have written this myself. No way would
I ever go back to this doctor.

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I am also mainstream oriented (as in I would never consider unassisted birth) and I would RUN not walk away from this dr.

With my first pregnancy with MW who worked with OBs, she told me at my 20week appt I would be induced at 39 weeks (for no appreciable medical reason). And guess what? That's what she wanted to do with me at my 39 week appt.

I say if someone sounds as if they're bad/bad fit in a non-stress environment, imagine how bad it will be when you need to trust their judgment in the stress of birth.

It sounds like you've had a rocky road in the past with drs and the medical community. But your current experience is NOT the norm. With my current pregnancy (at 29 weeks) I have seen three different dr.

The one I picked, I discussed in non-agressive manner (b/c I wanted to yell and scream about bad past experiences and demand different care) what my goals were and asked if he was comfortable in assisting me meeting them. I saw him at 18 weeks for the first time and the only thing he was a little pushy about was making sure I was sure about declining the Quad screening. The only reason he was "pushy" was because he wanted me to know that I was at the deadline and couldn't change my mind!

The other thing I might suggest is looking for a family doctor who delivers babies. They do exisit. They tend to handle low risk moms and more hands off approach.

The good news from this is you know NOW not later that this dr is bad and that all the tests you've done can be forwarded to the good dr/mw that you find in the furture.

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Old 10-19-2012, 10:59 AM   #22
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

I have had 2 deliveries at the hospital, 1 all natural, and hopefully will be having my 2nd natural in April. My doctor certainly leads toward the side of medicine but is nothing like this. This is all very excessive and I can only imagine what that will mean for you as things go on. I would definitely be finding a different ob or midwife.
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Old 10-19-2012, 10:59 AM   #23
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

I have had 2 deliveries at the hospital, 1 all natural, and hopefully will be having my 2nd natural in April. My doctor certainly leads toward the side of medicine but is nothing like this. This is all very excessive and I can only imagine what that will mean for you as things go on. I would definitely be finding a different ob or midwife.
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Old 10-19-2012, 01:26 PM   #24
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

Great...I was so afraid this wasn't "normal." In ND, my options are very limited when it comes to OB's. I am over 2 hours from a regular hospital with actual birthing suites, and I went through 3 of the OB's that deliver there by way of phone interviews. I mean the Dr I am seeing now seems totally normal compared to the crap they were telling me. This is the reason I went home to CA for all my other babies. Prior to this pg, I had 5 losses in 15 months, and no one here found that odd. I was refused all Hcg and Progesterone testing by every Dr I called, including the GP's. They aren't seen as something I "need" to know. I feel violated in a sense. My Nurse called me when she got all the results back and was excited when she said everything was negative, and how unusual it was they see that. Usually something pops up positive. My DH and I have been married forever, and we were both virgins when we married. Is it wrong to feel slightly icked out by her comment? I don't know what to do. We are so rural that my options are really limited. I am trying to be open minded, but it's starting to really wear me down.
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Old 10-19-2012, 01:34 PM   #25
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

I would not stay with a doctor who refused to compromise on things that are important to me. I think feeling at ease during labor is very very important, and with this guy you know you will really have to self advocate a lot!
I would contact the midwife that is 4 hours away and see if she has any insight or advice for you. She may even know of more midwives closer to your location. Good luck!
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Old 10-19-2012, 03:14 PM   #26
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

I've had a CNM hospital birth, a home birth, and with this one I am seeing an OB.

I am over 3 hours from the hospital. My last labor was 4 hours. The OB talked about inducing me on my due date if baby hadn't come by then only because DH and I are on spring break that week and will go to the city for that week. I am due the last day of spring break, so I'd be going home at 40 weeks. He said depending on how my cervix looks, we can induce with a balloon catheter (or something like that?) on my due date. He didn't mention anything earlier than 40 weeks.

I don't have to do any testing I don't want to do. I didn't have any exams done at my first visit. I would find a different doctor.
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Old 10-19-2012, 03:36 PM   #27
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

Hugs mama. Could you consider switching to a farther ob or midwife and then maybe just.... OOPS!.... accidentally not make it to the hospital in time? You could even call an ambulance as you are crowning so no one can try to pin anything on you...
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Old 10-19-2012, 05:47 PM   #28
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

Or could you consider staying at a hotel close to the hospital the last few days near 38-39 weeks and discuss it with your MD before hand? He may agree to hold off on induction if you are close by to the hospital
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Old 10-19-2012, 06:39 PM   #29
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I am reasonably mainstream, but that doc sounds awful. I've never had a pap or breast exam while pregnant. Ive discussed all tests and consented to some, no quad screen required. I've never been pushed into any medical intervention for convenience. You will not like how this ends if you stay with this tyrant.

Last edited by mibarra; 10-19-2012 at 06:41 PM.
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Old 10-19-2012, 07:32 PM   #30
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Re: First time with an OB...Normal?

Like everyone said, not normal. That sucks that you don't have many options I hope you can find something better for you.
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