What is a virgin?

[Huxley]

I asked my mom what a virgin was while watch Hocus Pocus. My mom told me it was someone who had never been kissed. I was really young.

[Vivhop98]

I would tell the truth.

[jeebee]

I was 9 when my parents told me about sex and i had already heard stories in school etc. And that was 25 years ago!

[songbird516]

Originally Posted by qsefthuko 9 is in my opinion waiting rather long to tell kids about sex. By that age kids in school will begin telling each other silly stories. I think only 2 years older I overheard boys discussing how you could tell by the way a girl walked if she was a virgin. In 6th grade I was informed by a schoolmate how to tell how big a boy was by the way his pants looked. For certain they had already been discussing these things for a while by then. So between 9-11 years of age such discussions in school start becoming more common among the kids. If the parents don't explain things to the child someone else will.

lol, I am feeling SO sheltered right now! And yes, I did go to public school. But somehow I never got into these conversations with anyone. Sometimes being one half of the bookworm twin duo has it's perks, I guess. I don't know what I would have said if someone told me that stuff!

[waterisntsomething]

Originally Posted by ktmelody The truth. Then i would answer the questions that follow with the truth. Young kids take that stuff so well. I feel that if the child is old enough to ask then they deserve a proper answer.

This. I would be very careful about linking it to innocence and purity because that can create the belief that sex=bad and dirty.

[newmommy13]

Originally Posted by waterisntsomething This. I would be very careful about linking it to innocence and purity because that can create the belief that sex=bad and dirty.

Yes even if not directly then maybe subconsciously in the future. Women have enough negativity from society in general regarding their sexuality without adding to it.

Guys I'm getting scared. Dd is 4 and is in pre k public school half days. Next year it is full day kindy and I want to cry thinking of her sweet pure little self hearing about this stuff. Thats too young.

[TinaDeanette]

I asked my mom what a virgin was when I was yoinger, she told me it was a vampire she also told me a tampon was a 'bandaid' which it kinda of is. So my point is this, just be truthful. It's not going to ruin their life to know the truth

[somo_chickenlady]

Originally Posted by newmommy13 Yes even if not directly then maybe subconsciously in the future. Women have enough negativity from society in general regarding their sexuality without adding to it. Guys I'm getting scared. Dd is 4 and is in pre k public school half days. Next year it is full day kindy and I want to cry thinking of her sweet pure little self hearing about this stuff. Thats too young.

I don't think 4 is too young. We started with very basic terms, and age appropriate language, when DS was 3. I'm not saying that this is the right thing to do for everyone, but starting as early as possible, and talking about it on a regular basis from the beginning, it isn't such a big deal. I think, the better prepared and knowledgeable they are, especially for girls, is nothing but a good thing. Sex is a normal thing, and not something to be embarrassed about. I don't want DS to be embarrassed about it when he gets older, and I want him to be comfortable coming to us when he is older. The lack of embarrassment is helpful, b/c we CAN talk about it so that when he is ready to become sexually active, he isn't afraid to protect himself.

On the other hand, I think 9 is WAY too old to have this discussion, especially to be embarrassed or unwilling to answer basic questions like these. There are a lot of girls getting their periods at age 10, my sister and a couple of my friends were some of them. There are kids that age that are even having sex and getting pregnant (not very often, but it DOES happen), and if they don't know that sex creates babies, then how are they supposed to know any different??

[*KaiMom*]

Originally Posted by jenn.mcc I would probably just keep it short and say a virgin is someone who is pure and innocent, like a young girl or boy who hasn't seen or done bad things. I'd probably also change the subject to alcohol, since most kids have at least seen beer or wine, and I'd be okay using that as an example in the hopes it's too confusing for them to think they could go applying the word to friends or adults tomorrow.

I truely hope that you can give your child a better explanation other than someone who has s*x is bad.

[somo_chickenlady]

Originally Posted by *KaiMom* I truely hope that you can give your child a better explanation other than someone who has s*x is bad.