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Old 11-25-2012, 08:59 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by RainandRedemption
ajane that's kind of why I was questioning it... but we wouldnt be making them wear anything in public, and we wouldn't do it in a way that would make the kids feel ridiculed.

The result of that crabiness that day was no park.

I guess I'm just trying to think of ways to address ds' attitude, which has not been the greatest lately. And I didn't explain very well. This isn't for tantrums. This would be an attempt to help ds learn to have a good/positive attitude. So often it seems, even after a seriously really flipping fun day, one small thing will disapoint him and it's "ooh I neeever get to do anything fun". Even, we could go to the arcade and 3 days later he's asking to go again, if we say no he'll say "I neeeever get to go to the arcade". :headscratch" dude, we just went the other day!

IDK if that just sounds like typical 5yo behavior, but it really is an attitude thing.
Ok, I see. So, more of a joking.....you are being such a crabby pants, go put yours on type thing. Like trying to make it a light hearted, but have him get the point on his own? Btw, I don't see him wearing a shirt or pants a mean thing, bug I couldn't put a tail in my kid, lol. No offense to AbbieJack, it's just not my thing.

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Old 11-25-2012, 09:53 PM   #22
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Re: Is this mean?

I wouldn't do it. It's not necessarily that it's mean but I think it would be ineffective. Little ones don't have the capacity or capability to deal with their emotions the way we do. Having him wear special pants because of a special emotion he is having just sounds counter-productive. You want him to work through the issue, emotion, attachment to the park, etc. Having him wear special pants would just confuse him and doesn't really address the real working through his emotions that he needs to learn from. However, it can still be a funny inside joke between you and your husband!
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Old 11-26-2012, 08:22 AM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by babyfever2012
I wouldn't do it. It's not necessarily that it's mean but I think it would be ineffective. Little ones don't have the capacity or capability to deal with their emotions the way we do. Having him wear special pants because of a special emotion he is having just sounds counter-productive. You want him to work through the issue, emotion, attachment to the park, etc. Having him wear special pants would just confuse him and doesn't really address the real working through his emotions that he needs to learn from. However, it can still be a funny inside joke between you and your husband!
Part of it too is that I'm trying to get him to take everything a little less seriously. (hes sooo serious). But curious, because I'm considering any and every thing, what would be your approach to teaching a child (5)to work through the emotion?
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Old 11-26-2012, 10:03 AM   #24
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Re: Is this mean?

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Originally Posted by AHIAMOM View Post
If you can't even get them to shut up how would you get the pants on them?
That's what I was thinking, lol.

For us, this idea would turn into a wrestling match to get them on the kid, while they wailed and screamed and fought to get me away from them with the obnoxious crabby pants. And then inevitably one of us would get hurt....

Crabby blanket to sit on for time out might work.

I don't know how effective it would be though. Like, "Here you were so bad, you have to sit on this special blanket that I had made just for when you are grumpy...." Kinda seems a little counterproductive. at least it would be for my kids. Bad behavior = sit on cool new blanket. lol
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Old 11-26-2012, 10:11 AM   #25
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Re: Is this mean?

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Originally Posted by RainandRedemption View Post
Part of it too is that I'm trying to get him to take everything a little less seriously. (hes sooo serious). But curious, because I'm considering any and every thing, what would be your approach to teaching a child (5)to work through the emotion?

I try to show my kids how to laugh at things.

But I am awful at it. I tend to be very impatient and get irritable when they don't follow instructions, so I think they respond by being emotional, too.

So I find that when I take the time to put in the effort to SHOW them how to laugh at themselves or a bad situation, it helps ME as well to do it more.

Example:

Me: No, we can't have McDonald's. I'm sorry, we just went there in the last month and we can't eat there too often, it's not good for us.

Kids: Go crazy

Me: Laugh. C'mon guys. It's just McDonald's. I bet we can think of something even better to have at home! How about ______ ?? And if you eat all your lunch, you can have ______ for dessert??

Kids: Calming down a little....

Me: Still laughing and happy: It's no big deal! We'll go to McDonald's again. Just not today, ok?

Kids: Grumbling... ok mom.

Me: OK! What should we make for lunch?!

Kids: Now smiling... Oh, I know! Blah blah.


Usually I try to do something like that. And it works probably 60-70% of the time. I try to stay happy and upbeat and laugh. Sometimes I will even laugh and say "oh my goodness! Why are you CRYING?! Are you HURT?!" ... which I KNOW is not nice. But seriously. They go ballistic over the craziest things sometimes.
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Old 11-26-2012, 01:35 PM   #26
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Re: Is this mean?

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Originally Posted by RainandRedemption View Post
Part of it too is that I'm trying to get him to take everything a little less seriously. (hes sooo serious). But curious, because I'm considering any and every thing, what would be your approach to teaching a child (5)to work through the emotion?
Well, I don't have alot of time right now to write back because my little is actually super needy today but here is an article I found interesting on tantrums and how to help a child through them!

http://joyfultoddlers.blogspot.com/2...-tantrums.html
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