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Old 11-23-2012, 04:55 PM   #21
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We don't do Santa either. DD knows about Santa the character because it is unavoidable, but we tell her he's a pretend character or game people like to play. We will continue explaining this year that some kids believe Santa is a real person and we don't spoil their surprise. I was raised with this idea myself.

We are Christian and while we do some 'secular' traditions like the tree and stocking, not playing into the Santa thing is more than just that for me.

I hope I don't get flamed for saying this- so those who disagree just know this is my own perspective.... I feel that it isn't fair to take advantages of a child's youth, imagination, trust, and blind faith in their parents to take advantage and essentially lie about big things like the Santa fantasy. I want my children to know that I would never mislead them, lie to them, or hurt them - especially over a game. Some kids are seriously upset when they learn Santa isn't real. I feel it can create a sense of distrust in adults- 'what else have you told me that isn't true'.

I work in the infant mental health field and decided long before I had children that I would be very careful in not abusing my child's innocent faith in me. Of course my daughter lives in a world of fantasy of her own with pretend play and as she tries to figure out how things work ... And I'm definitely not talking her out of that or spoiling her own fantasies and imagination or expecting her to get a hard dose of reality about everything. What I don't do is make up stories and convince her they are true or use them to my advantage.

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Old 11-23-2012, 07:16 PM   #22
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

We don't do Santa. Or any of the other holiday characters. We do tell our kids that it is just a story that some people like to pretend. I haven't specifically talked to them about not telling other kids that it's not real, but it hasn't been an issue so far. I will say I get quite sick of all the santa comment directed at my kids...."Are you looking forward to Santa?....Have you been good this year? It's almost time for good ol st. nick!.....What did Santa bring you this year?" My kids kind of give those comments a deer in the headlights look as I have to explain (yet again) to some random stranger that we don't do santa.
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Old 11-23-2012, 07:26 PM   #23
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

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Originally Posted by crunch!910 View Post
We do not do Santa. Or the Easter Bunny. Or Tooth Fairy. Or.. whatever. Not that we have a ban on those things in this house. We still watch movies such as the Polar Express and other christmas movies. It is just a matter of we do not teach that those things are REAL and exist. The kids can, however, pretend and play. Much like my son can get the plastic extension from the sweeper and call it a "sword", or pretend a stick is a gun, or pretend there are fish in a bowl of water, or use nothing but a string to "fish" in the bathtub.

We are Christian and try to celebrate the Holidays in our own way. Such as thanksgiving, I refuse to tell my boys the fake story. Even though it has a very ugly history behind it, how so many native americans were slaughtered, I'll use that history lesson to teach my boys to be opened minded, kind, and thankful. Turn a bad thing into a good thing.


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We don't do Santa or baby Jesus, just a tree and a few gifts from us. We do stockings just because I think they are fun, it's all from me though. Both my husband and I were raised in families that didn't do Christmas at all so we just pick and choose what we want to do.
Same here.
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Old 11-23-2012, 07:42 PM   #24
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

I actually feel less silly telling my kids about santa than telling them there is a man in the sky who looks over us. We all have different ways of raising our kids and the great thing is that all of our kids are going to turn out just fine

Plus I'm sure that my son will ruin the santa thing for his two little sisters before I know it!
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Old 11-23-2012, 09:29 PM   #25
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We don't do Santa either. My DS is newly 3 and we haven't talked about it either. My DS doesn't watch tv but my friend has mentioned Honey Boo Boo briefly in the past. A few days ago at the store he pointed out Santa several times and declared, "Honey Boo Boo!" Funniest thing ever.
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Old 11-23-2012, 10:40 PM   #26
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

We don't do Santa, but I don't really know if my girls believe in Santa or not. We never flat out told them that there isn't a Santa, but they don't get presents from Santa.

My 5 year old DD asked me tonight if the tooth fairy leaves money under your pillow when you lose a tooth. I told her the tooth fairy wasn't real and that mommy or daddy are the tooth fairy, but we will leave money when she loses a tooth. She said she knew there wasn't really a tooth fairy (though I don't know if she was just saying that). But she didn't seem bothered by it. I think I'll tell her about Santa this year.
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Old 11-24-2012, 04:55 AM   #27
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

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I don't think I want to. I just don't like it, seems like a pointless thing to lie about, and I want to focus on the religious aspect of Christmas. Maximum, we're considering telling the story of the saint and having a small tradition regarding that.

If you don't do Santa, how do you do it?

DS has several cousins very close to his age and I'm sure they'll all have Santa. How do I explain to him why a fat man doesn't come down our chimney to give him 800 presents? How do I keep the peace with my family when they're all ticked off that my son could potentially "ruin Christmas" for their kids? What do I do when my in-laws try to give him gifts "from Santa" because we won't (I'm positive this is some bull they'd pull)?
I told the kids this year that St. Nicholas was really a man and he was kind and generous, but he is in heaven now. And that Santa Claus is like a symbol of St. Nick and people dress up as him because he was such a kind man and it's fun. The older ones are 4 and 5 years old and they JUST are understanding that. Last year we talked about it and it flew over their heads and so we just went along with the Santa thing then. I told we can still set out reindeer food and set out Christmas cookies (and that Papa eats him and they LOVED that and thought it was funny). I told them they are NEVER to talk about St. Nick being dead to other people because some people and kids still believe he's alive and that's okay. And that they can pretend if they want to too.

So we still watch Santa movies and do crafts and other traditions, but they know it's all for fun and not real (well, they are still processing it because of how often they talk to me about it and get re-affirmed that Santa is just pretend). So if your children are younger than that, you might just want to play along because they will not get it. My younger two kids are 2-1/2 and 1 and so that's a lost cause. But for the 4 and 5 year olds, it was good timing this year to discuss it all.

We really emphasize Christ during this time more than Santa. It's such an awesome time to teach them how a baby can change the whole world! And about the gift Jesus is. Some fun books that are great for preschoolers are Crystal Bowman's board books for the holidays. It gives such a nice picture in words and illustrations about why we celebrate what we do and in a way that preschoolers can understand it (she has books about Christmas trees, angels, stars, candy canes, the birth of our Savior). I highly recommend them when they are this little.

As for family, both DH and I were raised knowing Santa is not alive. We were not traumatized and so our families aren't an issue. We each have a sibling who has their kids believe in Santa though so it's not something we discuss so they can keep that going for their kids. To each their own!
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Old 11-24-2012, 06:28 AM   #28
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

My mom was trying to INSIST I HAD to take the boys to go see Santa. My mom has photos of us doing that, being terrified, but still making us sit on his lap and take a picture of us crying. I think that is cruel. so I just told her "Why? So Santa can terrify them and they sit on his lap and cry? No thanks."

I'm not sure I've even ever told her that we do not do Santa. I actually don't tell anyone really, just to avoid the "WHAT!? You HAVE to do Santa!" responses. My coworkers finally got it out of me last Christmas because they kept asking "What's Santa getting him?" So finally had to say that we don't do Santa, and we only do a reasonable amount of presents that they know/will know is from us, each other, and family members. My coworkers still bought a present for m y son last year. One wrote "from Santa Carol." Whenever it come sup, such as if the boys are asked "What did you get from Santa"? we'll just have to keep reminding them thta people like to pretend he is real, but keep telling the story of St Nicholas.
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Old 11-24-2012, 06:38 AM   #29
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Re: Anyone not do santa?

We don't really do Santa in this house, but I do like to tell the story of St. Nicholas and use the story to encourage gift giving and generosity. Anyone have recommendations for children's books about the REAL history behind St Nick and Christmas? Looked last night and could only find Santa and Elves and all that. Boo! But I'm also cautious of buying online, because I like to look through the story and the pictures to make sure I approve of it, kwim?
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Old 11-24-2012, 08:33 AM   #30
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We don't do Santa but are not anti either. Obviously my 3 year old knows who he is and we have Santa decorations but we don't say he is brining gifts or put anything under the tree from Santa. They are young enough that we just don't do it. Santa is the same in this house as frosty or Rudolph. When they get older not sure how exactly I will address why Santa doesn't come here.
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