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Old 12-05-2012, 09:11 AM   #11
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Well, the twins are going home on Monday. It is going to be so weird not having them around. They are already part of our family. Part of me is in denial and not really want to admit that they are leaving. This was our first placement so I've never experienced this before.
I'm sure it's a huge mix of emotions. Happy for the bios and the kids, but sad to see them go. Do you feel like the bios will be able to be successful?

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Old 12-05-2012, 10:11 AM   #12
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

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If you could go straight adoption or foster to adopt...why not? There is someone there to force her hand, she can't really string you along anymore. Sorry I don't remember much of the story, but seems like now might be a good time to step in if you're looking to adopt???
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Sorry...I hope that didn't come off wrong, just trying to understand the situation better.
DH says that getting involved with them would be a nightmare that would haunt us for the rest of our lives. If we took their son, they would always be trying to be involved in everything we did with him. They would want to have him the entire morning at church. They would continue to act like they are his parents (his only parents) instead of making it a joint thing or a birthmom and birthdad thing. They would talk badly about us behind our backs. They would fight the system the entire way through the adoption process (we've watched them do it before with another son).

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Maybe it's just that there is no chance to keep him right now but they will be allowed to attempt refunification? That would be a mess to get involved in. Or are they going to terminate rights no matter what?
From what I understand, they are going straight to termination. They have no chance.

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(((KRISTI))) What a hard situation!!!

We were approved for foster/adopt. Jumping every time the phone rings & shop-shop-shopping for baby stuff like a crazy woman! While I am happy that things aren't so dire that we have had a phone call yet, I sure would like a babe to cuddle & shop for by Christmas! LOL!

(For those that don't know, we fostered in the past, so we have a little bit of experience. )
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Kristi what a hard situation to be in. I can empathize with both you and your husband. Maybe it's time to just cut off all contact with your late daughters birthmom. Who is to say that she won't be in the same exact position in a years time as well.
We actually expect the bolded to happen within a few months of losing the current baby. It's her track record. But children and youth isn't giving her any more chances, so she'll just lose that one too. If we took JJ (baby's initials), then they'd expect us to take every single one after that too. Who knows how many she can have before the stress of pregnancy on her diabetic, epileptic body kills her?

So as much as I WANT to say yes, because I adore babies and I want another one and I don't want to have to go through Gwen's first birthday without a baby, DH is right. It would be a haunting nightmare for life and their influence on his life if he were with us would be too great. We love that boy and want to see the cycle they're all in broken with him. It's just so sad and so hard to do nothing.
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Old 12-05-2012, 10:14 AM   #13
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

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Well, the twins are going home on Monday. It is going to be so weird not having them around. They are already part of our family. Part of me is in denial and not really want to admit that they are leaving. This was our first placement so I've never experienced this before.
((hugs)) That has to be so very hard!
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Old 12-05-2012, 01:10 PM   #14
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

I just found out that we missed out on 2 day old twins because they had only submitted our file to the other counties, not the one with the twins, when the call came in. DH is BUMMED out - and I am ever so relieved! LOL!!!
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Old 12-05-2012, 01:18 PM   #15
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

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That's so crazy. Talk about a kid being drug along through the system unnecessarily. He deserves permanency!
Agreed. It's beyond ridiculous!!
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Old 12-05-2012, 01:20 PM   #16
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

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Well, the twins are going home on Monday. It is going to be so weird not having them around. They are already part of our family. Part of me is in denial and not really want to admit that they are leaving. This was our first placement so I've never experienced this before.
Hang in there!! It's never easy.
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Old 12-05-2012, 01:26 PM   #17
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

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After the massive screw up on the part of the county...we are in a waiting period AGAIN! There is a hearing set for Jan 4 to clear up the ICWA issue (which was already cleared up, but this court is insisting we need this hearing also). Then the petition to terminate on dad will be submitted. A reduction in appeal period will also be argued. Sigh. So, SO frustrating. We should have finalized last thursday.
I hope that this time it all works out - and quickly!!!
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Old 12-05-2012, 01:27 PM   #18
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Re: DECEMBER 2012 CHAT THREAD

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Well, the twins are going home on Monday. It is going to be so weird not having them around. They are already part of our family. Part of me is in denial and not really want to admit that they are leaving. This was our first placement so I've never experienced this before.
(((HUGS))) it is hard!
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Old 12-05-2012, 09:14 PM   #19
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This is kind of a bummer start to the month.

Kristi I can't imagine. How is baby doing? This seems like such a tease, so unfair. A sweet baby that needs you and its just not going to work out.

Ivparker are you worried for the babies safety or just going to miss them?
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Old 12-05-2012, 09:17 PM   #20
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Happy December ladies! Life is cray-cray around here. We won't finalize until next month (boo!), but we have our last post placement supervision visit next week (yay!). Abraham is doing great. He's on reflux meds now which seem to be helping him gain weight. Little peanut isn't even 14 lbs. yet at 5.5 months.

Here he is with his cousin. I love his skin color up against this diaper.
I love his hair! He gets cuter every time I see him!

My favorite dipe on dfs is dazzle. He is very dark and its gorgeous on him. I guess its kind of girly but its too pretty!
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