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Old 12-10-2012, 09:15 PM   #11
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

Everything sounds normal except the sleep. My middle DD started having night terrors around that age (have pretty much stopped now). She would have her eyes fully open, but it was like she was still asleep, and she would just cry and scream. Talking to her would only make it worse and if I tried to touch her (to try to console her before we knew it was night terrors) she would get violent. Does it sound like that or is she aware of what's going on around her? If she's aware of her surroundings then it's probably not night terrors.

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Old 12-10-2012, 09:21 PM   #12
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

My 21 month old started waking back up this week, after STTN for a couple months. The only thing that is working for her is to just go in, let her know we are there, and walk back out, letting her CIO for awhile--usually about 20. She will then go back to sleep. But the first 3 nights, we get her up, let her come in our bed, tried to rock, etc, and all we did was prolong the going back to sleep. She didn't go back to sleep at all the first night, and won't until we put her in her crib and walk out. I am dreading the switch to a toddler bed.
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:25 PM   #13
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

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Originally Posted by kbstanley3 View Post
Everything sounds normal except the sleep. My middle DD started having night terrors around that age (have pretty much stopped now). She would have her eyes fully open, but it was like she was still asleep, and she would just cry and scream. Talking to her would only make it worse and if I tried to touch her (to try to console her before we knew it was night terrors) she would get violent. Does it sound like that or is she aware of what's going on around her? If she's aware of her surroundings then it's probably not night terrors.
I've considered that. She screams more when dad tries to pat her back, and does't listen when I talk. I've learned the best thing to do is physically grab her, wake her and restrain her. I say, "mommy and daddy are here. pink bear and yellow bear are here. we're all sleeping together." I ask if she had a "bad dream" but she doesn't respond, she tries to process the word dream, but I don't think she understands it. Is the "treatment" for night terrors different than that for bad dreams?
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:29 PM   #14
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

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Oh and by the way, I'm like 2 weeks from my due date with baby#2 and people say toddlers can get extra clingy. I'm also mostly bed-ridden and can't hold her much, so 50% of her tantrums are "uppy, mommy" (wants to be held, and not just held, but held some distance from the ground, and not just that, but walked as well). It's like she thinks I'm intentionally witholding affection or care.
To her you are, she doesn't understand why it is you can't pick her up. I went through this with my 17mo at the end of my pregnancy. She didn't understand I physically just couldn't hold her at that point. She still has issues with it sometimes because she doesn't understand I can't stop feeding the baby to hold her.

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Everything the "books" suggest: redirecting, suggesting an alternative course of action, ignoring, humor (but not much of that these days), and rationalizing (makes it worse). We've never done "time outs" and she's probably young for that, but I don't think of her behavior as "punishable". Just frustrating, annoying, fruitless, and anything I do is futile.
She's not too young for time outs. My now 21mo gets timeouts and she does understand. It is just a time to sit down and calm down. TBH, it sounds like she's testing because she knows you're limited AND she wants the attention. It'll probably get worse before it gets better, especially with a new LO coming and her figuring that out. But it's all pretty normal for 2. They aren't called the terrible twos for nothing.
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:29 PM   #15
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

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My 21 month old started waking back up this week, after STTN for a couple months. The only thing that is working for her is to just go in, let her know we are there, and walk back out, letting her CIO for awhile--usually about 20. She will then go back to sleep. But the first 3 nights, we get her up, let her come in our bed, tried to rock, etc, and all we did was prolong the going back to sleep. She didn't go back to sleep at all the first night, and won't until we put her in her crib and walk out. I am dreading the switch to a toddler bed.
Ah, if only my DD crib-trained... Her CIO lasts 4 hours until dawn, even when we ARE there comforting her. My friend was telling me about setting her DD up with her first toddler bed. She learned that it was helpful to keep a night light on, versus complete sensory deprivation in the crib. Somehow it gave this particular toddler a sense of security.
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:31 PM   #16
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sounds like normal 2 year old behavior

watch out for 3s
Omg yes. 3. My hubby prefers 3 to 2. Not me. Not me.
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Old 12-10-2012, 09:59 PM   #17
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OT = occupational therapist? I didn't know they worked with toddlers in that kind of stuff. That actually reminds me, our state has a "first five" program that is free.

Re: waking at night. This became actually a reguar occurrence lately. And it's usually about 2am'ish. Sometimes it seems like nightmares. Most of the time I can hold her and rock her back to sleep (only me, not dad). But sometimes she's completely inconsolable and we're up til dawn. Her language skills are fine for her age. She signs and chatters a lot. And I can understand that her language lags behind her other developmental capacities, but they are still advanced enough to understand when I say: "no, mirror CAN'T close in half" or "too much in box, CAN'T close cover". It's like she thinks I'm intentially witholding some magical physics-defying feat from her.

Oh and by the way, I'm like 2 weeks from my due date with baby#2 and people say toddlers can get extra clingy. I'm also mostly bed-ridden and can't hold her much, so 50% of her tantrums are "uppy, mommy" (wants to be held, and not just held, but held some distance from the ground, and not just that, but walked as well). It's like she thinks I'm intentionally witholding affection or care.
That's rough. :-( That's exactly what happened with my son, too. I think having a sibling comin in during that crazy toddler time makes the normal stuff a bit more "pronounced" than normal. :-) But my DS is 4.5 now and dd is 1.5. He mellowed out (mostly), and she is now taking her turn with the drama. Lol.
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Old 12-10-2012, 10:27 PM   #18
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All of it sounds normal to me. I've currently got a 26 month old.

Even the sleep thing sounds fairly normal. There's a 24month sleep regression. All of a sudden my child who had STTN most of her life was up 5-6x a night. We 'cured' that with consistency and a toddler clock.

That being said, your child's verbal skills trump my daughters. She's on par, yours might be a little ahead.

No real advice. I either ignore or discipline tantrums. I'm not much of a tantrum redirecter. I just don't have the patience for it. Meltdowns are less frequent these days, but still exist.

I have noticed she all of a sudden seems to be needing more sleep than before. If your daughter is getting less sleep, that might be another reason she's tantruming so much - overtired.

My fun child was replaced over night it seems. We're all just trying to get our loveable kids back - lol. But just choose a course of action, be consistent and I think you'll see improvement.
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Old 12-10-2012, 10:36 PM   #19
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

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She's not too young for time outs. My now 21mo gets timeouts and she does understand. It is just a time to sit down and calm down. TBH, it sounds like she's testing because she knows you're limited AND she wants the attention. It'll probably get worse before it gets better, especially with a new LO coming and her figuring that out. But it's all pretty normal for 2. They aren't called the terrible twos for nothing.
Good. We start time outs tomorrow.

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My fun child was replaced over night it seems. We're all just trying to get our loveable kids back - lol.
That describes it just right!
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Old 12-10-2012, 11:09 PM   #20
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Re: Does this seem normal or should I get my child checked out?

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sounds like normal 2 year old behavior

watch out for 3s
This is what I was going to say. My DS is in the middle of the 3's and I'm going crazy!
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