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Old 01-04-2013, 01:22 PM   #11
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Re: Stepping on toes...

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I don't want people with colds, flu, etc over, and I know some people may not be forward about that so they can see baby.
This is a very valid point! Ive definitely seen this in practice and its part of the reason I wont be having visitors myself for a while after baby is born.

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Old 01-04-2013, 01:38 PM   #12
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Re: Stepping on toes...

Not pushy at all, in fact I might just steal it! I am already doing a sign for the door, and turning off my cell phone. DH will call me at a certain point in the day, during his lunch hour, and that is all. We are having another homebirth, and I homeschool, so my friends think I am just here and they can pop on by any time. NOPE! In fact, I have already told my parents (who live out of state) not to come for a month, and my mom TOTALLY gets it - I was so sick as a baby, and she does not want me stressing about sick people and passing ickiness on to us or the baby. We literally are not allowing anyone around the baby for the first few weeks. It just isn't worth the risk, and honestly - I really just want to be left alone to bond with my baby, and let my older kids bond too!
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Old 01-04-2013, 01:44 PM   #13
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Re: Stepping on toes...

Everyone want to see the baby. I had people who I never see at all want to come and see my baby~yeah right! I think you were appropriate in your post. People need to respect your decision.
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Old 01-04-2013, 01:51 PM   #14
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Re: Stepping on toes...

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Originally Posted by Ellasundies View Post
I totally get what your saying but I did not read your post as lighthearted and fun. Personally *no flames please* it sounded a little snobby and rude to me.
You're the one whose car is sitting in the driveway when we pull in from the hospital, aren't you? LOL
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Old 01-04-2013, 01:57 PM   #15
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I think it's totally fine. Probably the reason your getting flames from your relatives is because they're pushy and self-centered. They dont like to be told that things cant be their way. (I may be projecting about my own family ).

I see no problems with your creating boundaries before hand.
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Old 01-04-2013, 02:51 PM   #16
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Re: Stepping on toes...

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You're the one whose car is sitting in the driveway when we pull in from the hospital, aren't you? LOL
That was my thought exactly - DH's family gets it, mine doesn't, and neither do most of my friends. I am not above self-preservation, especially in the early weeks of new-babyhood, with raging hormones, lack of sleep, cranky older siblings adjusting to a newbie, piles of laundry and dishes taller than I am, and the "regular" stuff that life throws at you... Keep the he11 away unless you are coming to drop off dinner. There is an empty box outside the door, you can leave the casserole there. And don't ring the bell. Thanks.

Sad, because some people who "get it" would be welcome company, but the few who overstep their boundaries ruin it for the rest.
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Old 01-04-2013, 03:00 PM   #17
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Sounds good to me! but I have a 3wk old so.....lol

And fwiw I usually love hospital visitors but this time the only person we allowed to come see us is my mom so she could bring the girls by to meet their brother!
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Old 01-04-2013, 03:55 PM   #18
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Re: Stepping on toes...

Totally valid! Don't sweat it! I had the EXACT same thing happen. My LO is only 9 weeks and I'm still p**sing people off because if they have even the slightest cold I tell them sorry, no, can't come over. I had the doc tell me this is a horrible flu season and not to take any risks, so I'm not, and I'm not apologizing for that!
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Old 01-04-2013, 03:57 PM   #19
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Re: Stepping on toes...

I never have visitors at my house after a new baby (aside from whichever Grandma is at the house to take care of my other kids). But I deliver on base in a locked Maternity Ward My husband's supervisor always stops by and we welcome him, but he's a close family friend and is usually bringing me food!
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Old 01-04-2013, 04:25 PM   #20
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Re: Stepping on toes...

I don't think your message is like stepping on anyone's shoes. I feel you mama because I can relate. You're straight and honest with how you feel, and no mother who has just given birth would want any visitors with colds, cough or flu to see her new baby.

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