Do you clean your teen's room?

[geez0pete]

I don't clean my kids' rooms. They are expected to keep it manageable but not perfect. Probably once a year I go through and help them reorganize their toys containers, closet, etc. I vacuum their rooms and do laundry but the kids do separate their dirty clothes into the hampers in the laundry room.

My dd--almost 11 washes her own laundry. We went through a period where she couldn't remember to take care of her dirty clothes so would bring me an entire load at a time, so she is now responsible for washing her own clothes. She does really well with it.

[Kiliki]

Originally Posted by TinaDeanette We told DS that he can keep his room how he wants as long as the door is shut. Well, that's just not working because when I go put his clean laundry on his bed I have to walk through piles of dirty laundry. It's rather disgusting. So I usually clean it for him. I'm wondering now if our 'plan' wasn't the brightest! How should I handle this? Any good plans to use with your teens. I also fear that I am setting him up for failure when he moves out on his own because I'm always cleaning up after him. I don't want him to have to make his room 'sparkling' clean everyday. He's a teen boy!

Ok, so I will tell you my experience...

Growing up, my parents were pretty lax about cleaning rooms. I cleaned my room probably once every other week as a teenager. I didn't like it once it got too messy and out of hand.

On the other hand, my only sibling, my brother, would literally have rotting food on dirty plates sitting in his room, stuffed under his bed, candy wrappers, old glasses of milk with chunks in it, wet towels that were never hung up that had mold growing on them.......

He room would get seriously absolutely completely downright NASTY.

And my mom would be brought to tears over it, and go in and scrub it spotless.

He is now 24 and exactly the same. He does NOT clean. He doesn't do laundry until he has nothing left to wear. He will buy a pack of socks before he will wash his himself. So he has 500 pairs of socks. If he DOES do laundry, he leaves it in the dryer and my poor mom has to fold it. Then he won't put it away, he'll leave it ON TOP of his dresser. It winds up falling on the floor, where it gets walked on with his dirty boots, and has to be re-washed. And this is just the laundry. He is not as bad with food, but still has similar issues. half-eaten candy bars, etc laying around....

Honestly, it's gross.

[TinaDeanette]

Originally Posted by Kiliki Ok, so I will tell you my experience... Growing up, my parents were pretty lax about cleaning rooms. I cleaned my room probably once every other week as a teenager. I didn't like it once it got too messy and out of hand. On the other hand, my only sibling, my brother, would literally have rotting food on dirty plates sitting in his room, stuffed under his bed, candy wrappers, old glasses of milk with chunks in it, wet towels that were never hung up that had mold growing on them....... He room would get seriously absolutely completely downright NASTY. And my mom would be brought to tears over it, and go in and scrub it spotless. He is now 24 and exactly the same. He does NOT clean. He doesn't do laundry until he has nothing left to wear. He will buy a pack of socks before he will wash his himself. So he has 500 pairs of socks. If he DOES do laundry, he leaves it in the dryer and my poor mom has to fold it. Then he won't put it away, he'll leave it ON TOP of his dresser. It winds up falling on the floor, where it gets walked on with his dirty boots, and has to be re-washed. And this is just the laundry. He is not as bad with food, but still has similar issues. half-eaten candy bars, etc laying around.... Honestly, it's gross.

Thankfully he doesn't eat In there so we don't have too worry about that!

[newbiemama]

i was a messy teen, too. i'm just not a very 'clean' person, but i am organized! i don't mind piles of clothes, toys, clutter around a room. for a teen, that's acceptable. it's when the piles get so big they overtake the entire floor, or the laundry is everywhere there's no clothes in drawers or closets, or if there are dirty dishes, THAT'S too much and needs to be dealt with. but piles of toys, clothes, clutter... totally normal.

[bluedaisyma]

Originally Posted by TinaDeanette We told DS that he can keep his room how he wants as long as the door is shut. Well, that's just not working because when I go put his clean laundry on his bed I have to walk through piles of dirty laundry. It's rather disgusting. So I usually clean it for him. I'm wondering now if our 'plan' wasn't the brightest! How should I handle this? Any good plans to use with your teens. I also fear that I am setting him up for failure when he moves out on his own because I'm always cleaning up after him. I don't want him to have to make his room 'sparkling' clean everyday. He's a teen boy!

I don't do my teens laundry, heck, they start doing their own about age 8, or earlier so problem solved- I don't have to go in their rooms ever. My kids keep their rooms pretty clean on their own. My 19 yr old tho, I tell him to clean his room now and then bc he really can't find things in there.

[Kiliki]

Originally Posted by TinaDeanette Thankfully he doesn't eat In there so we don't have too worry about that!

Ok I didn't get to finish my post cause I had to leave to satisfy a mad Mexican food craving.

But to finish up....

At one point, he piled the clothes so high behind his bedroom door that the door broke off the hinges. The hinges literally snapped. And my dad was so furious when he saw inside his room that he refused to give him back his bedroom door until my brother cleaned it all up himself. I also remember him losing his bedroom door once after that some time later. That was a really effective punishment for him.

Unfortunately it only lasted a few wks. I think b/c they didn't stay on top of it. And my mom wasn't the best housekeeper, either.

As a result of that, I am trying to train my kids to clean their rooms often, and to keep things tidy, and to help out around the house with clean up.

Anyway, I agree w/PP who said you are raising someone's future husband. It is worth the headache now to fight this battle, rather than to have him grow up and be a gross slob. Trust me, it's sad.

[MrsAsh]

My mom works cleaning other's houses and I worked with her before I had kids and one house we did had a teen boy and he'd leave dirty laundry piled knee high and the room was always a MESS while vacuuming one day we unearthed a dead mouse under the laundry and the laundry was picked up weekly most of the time. It doesn't take long, so yes I'd def make him clean his room and keep all laundry picked up. It's not any harder to drop laundry in a hamper then it is to drop in the floor.

[Samandy]

My kids are only 5 and 9 and there is no way I'd clean their rooms as teenagers. I won't even clean my 5 year old's room unless he is in there helping and if he doesn't help enough, I stop. I do not have high expectations or anything, but piles of dirty laundry?? Hell no. At 14, I think I'd give one chance to clean it up then I'd seriously be thinning out his wardrobe.

[mom2ally06]

Originally Posted by Kiliki Ok, so I will tell you my experience... Growing up, my parents were pretty lax about cleaning rooms. I cleaned my room probably once every other week as a teenager. I didn't like it once it got too messy and out of hand. On the other hand, my only sibling, my brother, would literally have rotting food on dirty plates sitting in his room, stuffed under his bed, candy wrappers, old glasses of milk with chunks in it, wet towels that were never hung up that had mold growing on them....... He room would get seriously absolutely completely downright NASTY. And my mom would be brought to tears over it, and go in and scrub it spotless. He is now 24 and exactly the same. He does NOT clean. He doesn't do laundry until he has nothing left to wear. He will buy a pack of socks before he will wash his himself. So he has 500 pairs of socks. If he DOES do laundry, he leaves it in the dryer and my poor mom has to fold it. Then he won't put it away, he'll leave it ON TOP of his dresser. It winds up falling on the floor, where it gets walked on with his dirty boots, and has to be re-washed. And this is just the laundry. He is not as bad with food, but still has similar issues. half-eaten candy bars, etc laying around.... Honestly, it's gross.

I bet he gets ALL the ladies!

[Kiliki]

Originally Posted by mom2ally06 I bet he gets ALL the ladies!

I keep hoping it is a maturity issue and he will grow out of it... but, he is 24 :/. And I fear he actually never learned the skills or self discipline to clean up after himself. It makes me sad. .