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Old 01-17-2013, 01:52 PM   #101
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

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There is a formula readily available and its really simple. Don't allow them to walk in dangerous locations (Parking lot ,subway and so on) until you are sure that they have mastered the art of staying with you. DS was a runner but you know what if he did not obey and he chose to run or straggled off than he was contained in either a stroller or a carrier . He learned rather quickly that if he wanted the privilege of walking around like a big boy that he was to obey and stay with me.


So you contained your child when he didn't listen in order to teach him how to behave? Wow, that's like me putting my dog in her crate when she misbehaves in order to teach her the proper way to behave. It's terrible you treat your child like a dog.

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Old 01-17-2013, 01:57 PM   #102
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

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Can we PLEASE call it a mom on a rope from here forward? Perhaps it's the term "leash" that's gaining the negative vibes around here. And realistically, if you've ever used one, you quickly realize its the MOM who's on the "leash", not the tot.
There are actually 3 different kinds- a children's leash, a child's rope and a child's safety harness. Technically.
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Old 01-17-2013, 01:57 PM   #103
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

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I bought a leash (It's a cute teddy bear like backpack) for DH at Christmas. He's over 6 ft tall and can not comfortably walk holding DD's hand. He's like to take her for walks around the block but if he has to stoop over to do it ... it just isn't possible. My son had a leash and I used it when we went walking on nature trails as a toddler. He got to run and play and I didn't have to worry about his safety. I'm 5 ft so carrying a 30lb to 40lb kid 2 miles is a bit more of a work-out than I'd care for. We have a jogger stroller and and carriers. But there are times where you don't want to push your kid around or carry them.

It's not like I'm ever going to tie my kid to the clothesline pole with it and leave them outside for an hour.

Of course, I also don't care what people think. I'm going to do what I think is best for my kid. If they don't like the leash.. Fine. They don't have to use one.
My grandmother would tie my hyper active uncle to a tree in he front yard. She had things that had to be done and a child who wouldn't remain in the house or yard. It scandalized the neighbors but kept her son safe. He is now a happy well adjusted adult. A father of 2 and grandfather of 4.
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Old 01-17-2013, 01:58 PM   #104
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

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I've never used one but can see how in some situations one could assist a parent in keeping their child safe.

I really wish they were not called 'leashes' or 'harnesses' - perhaps something like 'safety connectors'
Whaaaaa....it's not like I use one of those pinch collars or anything FTR, DD just calls it her "monkey backpack" (as opposed to her Cookie Monster backpack or school backpack).

ETA--SIL handed down some sort of retractable wrist connector leash thing, but DP & I felt that the potential for unintentional garotting was too high, so it got packed away somewhere & I don't even know where it is now.
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Old 01-17-2013, 01:59 PM   #105
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Originally Posted by qsefthuko
My grandmother would tie my hyper active uncle to a tree in he front yard. She had things that had to be done and a child who wouldn't remain in the house or yard. It scandalized the neighbors but kept her son safe. He is now a happy well adjusted adult. A father of 2 and grandfather of 4.
Omg, I can see all sorts of posts regarding 'staking' children. I already have the popcorn out. This thread is GREAT for the person home sick with the flu.
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Old 01-17-2013, 02:02 PM   #106
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

Me just looking up the technical name and seeing pictures makes me think of that poor little boy. I'm glad no one has had to witness one being misused because it truly is cruel.
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Old 01-17-2013, 02:23 PM   #107
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If you had asked me 5 years ago my response was 'Those are horrible! What kind of lazy parent would put their kid in a leash?! If they just disciplined their kids then they would walk properly.' Then my nephew was born. That child (whom I love dearly) has the attention span of a gnat. He wanders around and moves so quickly that if you blink too long he will vanish. My sister stopped using it when he was about 3/4 when he started pre-k and she was pregnant and not going anywhere often. He started walking about 15 months old and hasn't stopped moving yet, he will be 6 next month.
I have never (thankfully) had to use one on my 4 mobile ones yet, but I do think they can be useful for the strong Willie independent child.
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Old 01-17-2013, 02:54 PM   #108
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Originally Posted by s@hmommy View Post

If he runs uninhibited without a worry in the world into the street, then yes, it may not be a terrible idea!
Now I'm picturing my husband walking around all lackadaisical, like my preschoolers, then stopping and getting behind the crowd because he's starting at a kitty that my daughter swore was a platypus (true story, happened in the Walmart packing lot today).
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Old 01-17-2013, 03:05 PM   #109
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

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Originally Posted by happysmileylady View Post
If your child is always contained, he has no choice to make. If he has no choice to make, he has not opportunity to learn to make the right one. If he has chosen to run off, then he has had the opportunity to make the choice and was not contained. My job as a parent is to make sure that my child is safe while still being given the opportunity to learn to make the write choice. Thank goodness one of your son's learning opportunities in which you gave him the chance to walk beside you and he chose to run or straggle off didn't result in a car hitting him. There's nothing wrong with a parent not wanting to take that same risk you did.

And if he had the chance to run off which resulted in you containing him in the stroller, then clearly he didn't learn to obey on the very first try either. SO, no magic formula.
I think you are misunderstanding the application. AbbyJack was very specific that the child wasn't allowed to make the choice in dangerous places like parking lots, but not in other places. So those other places were opportunities for the child to demonstrate their ability to stay close.

In my family, the child MUST hold a parent's hand in order to be allowed to walk. So they CAN choose to hold hands and walk OR be contained in some other way (stroller, cart, carrier). If the child refuses to hold hands or attempts to wriggle free, then they make the CHOICE to be contained instead of walking.

ETA: No child learns to follow the rules the first try. It takes a lot of repetition and enforcement of the rules. Whether you contain your child on a harness, in a stroller, or by holding their hand, you are still containing them and limiting their choice until THEY are capable of remaining with you without the containment.
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Old 01-17-2013, 03:06 PM   #110
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Re: Toddlers on a leash

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Originally Posted by myclanof6 View Post
If you had asked me 5 years ago my response was 'Those are horrible! What kind of lazy parent would put their kid in a leash?! If they just disciplined their kids then they would walk properly.' Then my nephew was born. That child (whom I love dearly) has the attention span of a gnat. He wanders around and moves so quickly that if you blink too long he will vanish. My sister stopped using it when he was about 3/4 when he started pre-k and she was pregnant and not going anywhere often. He started walking about 15 months old and hasn't stopped moving yet, he will be 6 next month.
I have never (thankfully) had to use one on my 4 mobile ones yet, but I do think they can be useful for the strong Willie independent child.
That made me LOL. Hubby looked at me funny.
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