Diaper Swappers

**FernHollow** · 01-28-2013, 09:32 AM

Update post 13.

I am in the process of losing a very surprise, but wanted pregnancy. We had been preventing and were really surprised but very excited at the thought of one last baby to complete our family when we found out recently. I know there is no way we will try for another child and this is making me really struggle with the peace I had previously made with being "done". I dreamed of our baby last night, a sweet baby girl who looked like her big sister but with her Daddy's blue eyes. She had the most beautiful name, one that I wouldn't have thought of but seemed so right. I woke up this morning bleeding heavily and cramping. I am so heartbroken.

My dh will still be going ahead with a vasectomy soon and while he would have happily welcomed this surprise and is a bit disappointed.. he wants to be done. No more babies for us. It seems so unfair to have this dangled in front of me and then ripped away. I am praying that I can cope with loss in the face of knowing that another child will never be.

greencrunchymama · 01-28-2013, 09:44 AM

I am so sorry

firemommaof1 · 01-28-2013, 09:56 AM

I'm so sorry. That has to be so emotional for you ((hugs)) Prayers for peace in this situation.

sojomisa · 01-28-2013, 10:14 AM

I'm so sorry, mama!

homebirthmom · 01-28-2013, 10:18 AM

oh no mama. my heart breaks for you. it seems your heart is calling for another and I would hope your hubby reconsiders for a bit.
in the meantime, many hugs

alaskamum · 01-28-2013, 11:27 AM

**FernHollow** · 01-28-2013, 07:29 PM

Thank you for the kindness mamas. I have spent most the day crying until my head hurt. I ended up sharing the sad news with my very closest friends and my mom today and their loving support has helped so much. Dh and I are both very sad and spending the evening snuggling our 5 sweet kiddos. I think DH was surprised by his own feelings honestly when we did some talking and grieving today. I feel less alone*but it doesn't change that the baby is gone and I feel so empty.

whitneywalters · 01-28-2013, 07:31 PM

I am sorry.

happymama1 · 01-28-2013, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by homebirthmom

oh no mama. my heart breaks for you. it seems your heart is calling for another and I would hope your hubby reconsiders for a bit.
in the meantime, many hugs

exactly what I would have said...so sorry for your loss!!

evasimone · 01-28-2013, 08:20 PM

I am so sorry for your loss.

01-28-2013, 09:32 AM	#1
FernHollow Banned Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 8,397 Ratings: 153 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	prayers for me, please. (pg. loss mentioned) UPDATE post 13 Update post 13. I am in the process of losing a very surprise, but wanted pregnancy. We had been preventing and were really surprised but very excited at the thought of one last baby to complete our family when we found out recently. I know there is no way we will try for another child and this is making me really struggle with the peace I had previously made with being "done". I dreamed of our baby last night, a sweet baby girl who looked like her big sister but with her Daddy's blue eyes. She had the most beautiful name, one that I wouldn't have thought of but seemed so right. I woke up this morning bleeding heavily and cramping. I am so heartbroken. My dh will still be going ahead with a vasectomy soon and while he would have happily welcomed this surprise and is a bit disappointed.. he wants to be done. No more babies for us. It seems so unfair to have this dangled in front of me and then ripped away. I am praying that I can cope with loss in the face of knowing that another child will never be. __________________ Leaving DS so I can spend less time on the computer and more time with my family Last edited by FernHollow; 01-30-2013 at 09:29 AM.

01-28-2013, 09:44 AM	#2
greencrunchymama Registered Users Join Date: Jul 2011 Posts: 4,338 Ratings: 42 Feedback: 100%	Re: prayers for me, please. (pg. loss mentioned) I am so sorry __________________ Jen, married to DH mama to DD 01.22.12

01-28-2013, 09:56 AM	#3
firemommaof1 Registered Users Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: By the Blue Lake Posts: 5,477 Ratings: 458 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: prayers for me, please. (pg. loss mentioned) I'm so sorry. That has to be so emotional for you ((hugs)) Prayers for peace in this situation. __________________ Sage ~ Married and madly in love with my hottie husband for 10 years Mama to My Awesome Son~ 8/19/03 and My Tiny Dancer DD~ 5/14/07 Sweet Baby Cally 5/23/11

01-28-2013, 10:14 AM	#4
sojomisa Registered Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: MD Posts: 4,447 Ratings: 11 Feedback: 100%	Re: prayers for me, please. (pg. loss mentioned) I'm so sorry, mama! __________________ Kim, a doing what works for us mama to S (06/01), J (03/03), M (12/07) and S (01/11) ~Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.~

01-28-2013, 10:18 AM	#5
homebirthmom Registered Users Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 7,119 Ratings: 272 Feedback: 100% My Mood:	Re: prayers for me, please. (pg. loss mentioned) oh no mama. my heart breaks for you. it seems your heart is calling for another and I would hope your hubby reconsiders for a bit. in the meantime, many hugs __________________ homebirthin mom to 5 4 born unassisted. lost 6 along the way.