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Old 01-29-2013, 11:43 AM   #21
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

I just explain that private parts are not for playing with, they are for peeing with. And pee is gross. So let's not put our hands on our private parts, or put our private parts on other things. And that's pretty much EXACTLY what I say about it.

At the same time, this goes hand-in-hand with teaching good/proper hygiene, and encouraging open communication about body parts. My 6 y/o knows not to play with her private parts, but she also knows that if she has a question about them, I am here to answer them for her.

Naked time (except for babies) is reserved for bathroom breaks, changing your clothes, and bathing. Otherwise, I encourage them to be dressed and covered, even at home.

It doesn't have to be a big deal if you don't make it one. I don't punish for exploratory touching in babies. It's silly. But I do redirect, distract, and say "No - our private parts are for going potty, and they have pee pee on them..." etc.

I have 3 kids and so far none of them have had trouble keeping their hands off their private areas. I think just communicating with them can help a lot. But it's a delicate balance between - "Your vagina is DIRTY" and "Let's not touch ourselves that way please."

...as they get more vocal, it gets more complicated... lol.

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Old 01-29-2013, 11:43 AM   #22
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

Quote:
Originally Posted by kushie tushie View Post
Repetition. Same way you teach a child anything.
I can't see your siggy so I don't know how old your DD is but my 3yr old still needs to be told the same thing 20 times a day.
Just keep telling her it needs to be done in private and redirect her. She will get it eventually.

I'm mobile.... sorry for the typos!
Definitely repetition. DD is 5 and from time to time- not too often- still needs to be reminded to head to her room.

OP the original comment made it sound like you thought it was something dirty. Maybe edit it to say ladies don't do that in public? Then you should stop getting shame comments.
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Old 01-29-2013, 11:44 AM   #23
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

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Originally Posted by soonerfan View Post
Why would you tell her ladies don't do that? Ladies (and gentlemen) absolutely do this. Instead of shaming the act, which is a natural, normal act, and creating a lifelong issue with sexuality, why not teach appropriate boundaries? For our kids, that type of touching is only ok if they are alone in their rooms or bathroom.
Ladies don't touch their genitals in front of an audience! It was my understanding that that was OP's issue.
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Old 01-29-2013, 11:50 AM   #24
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

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Originally Posted by Amjohnstone32 View Post
I am just curious as to the normalcy of this. She doesn't when she gets tired. And has been doing it since she was about 1 1/2. I told her no, and say that is something that ladies don't do. And of course her being two, she throws a bug fat fit.

I just need some direction as far as what has worked for other people, and maybe what to say? Or do for that matter.
I think there are plenty of ladies who masterbate. it's her body...if she was rubbing her knee would you discourage that? .

I just tell my 2yr old son he can do that in the bathroom or bedroom.
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Old 01-29-2013, 11:52 AM   #25
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

In the op you didn't state she was doing it in front of people. In that case I would try to discretely divert her attention and not make a big deal about it. If she throws a tantrum, be firm and don't pay too much attention to it. Explain simply that this is not the time to do that. I feel bringing in the "ladies don't do that" part is unnecessary and may be harmful and cause shame in the future about sex. JMO.
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Old 01-29-2013, 11:55 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by Amjohnstone32
I agree that ladies and gentlemen both do it! But ladies don't do it in front of everyone. I wasn't trying to shame the act, I have told her to do it in private. But she continues to do so in certain situations. Obviously I'm not perfect, which is why I even asked the question and brought the topic up. I was asking for help, not condemnation I know that it is perfectly natural, God created those areas as a gift to enjoy. I just wanted some advice as far as how to teach what is right and what is wrong. Thanks everyone.
I suppose I will just quote myself, I am mobile, can't edit my OP.
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Old 01-29-2013, 11:58 AM   #27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom23kids
In the op you didn't state she was doing it in front of people. In that case I would try to discretely divert her attention and not make a big deal about it. If she throws a tantrum, be firm and don't pay too much attention to it. Explain simply that this is not the time to do that. I feel bringing in the "ladies don't do that" part is unnecessary and may be harmful and cause shame in the future about sex. JMO.
Thank you and to everyone who didn't make me feel like a big pile of poo for asking and explaining perfectly legit concern. I truly appreciate the advice!
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Old 01-29-2013, 12:19 PM   #28
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

It is a good question, I'm sorry you feel attacked :hug:
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Old 01-29-2013, 12:58 PM   #29
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Yes it was a good question. I'm in the same boat op she mostly does it to go to sleep but I caught her at her nanas doing it a few times so I try to distract her when she's in front of people but the past few days if she's in her bed or doing it to sleep I've been letting her. It's hard to figure out what to do sometimes with things like this. If you ever want to talk you can pm me we may can help each other through this phase or whatever it may be cause I've got it going on here to.!
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Old 01-29-2013, 02:06 PM   #30
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Re: 2yo DD Touching Lady Parts. .

My child hasn't reached this stage yet, but I think it's still normal for that age. She does refer to her vagina though.

I think telling her it's private is definitely the way to go. I had a friend who's child did it ALL THE TIME and then of course, she's touching toys, etc. I would much prefer that the child understand that they can have private time if they need to do that.
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