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Old 02-09-2013, 02:34 PM   #1
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I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

My son is 12 mths old. When he was born he latched on at only a few minutes old, he nursed for about an hr right away! I felt like I knew what I was doing, I felt like I had it down...afterall, DD was only weaned a few mths before he was born. But as the weeks and months went by we had such a difficult time nursing! He would latch, then unlatch and yell. He would kick and scream and fight me! He HATED to nurse. I talked to his ped, I talked to a LC. I read online. He seemed to have signs of colic, he was a low weight baby (but dd was/is by nature so we assumed he was just tiny too and he may be...17lbs at 12 mths old isn't too bad)

At 5 mths old I was so sleep deprived. I was dealing with ppd with a baby who had colic. No one was sleeping because all he did was CRY!!!! He was a VERY fussy baby. He has been the hardest baby I have ever known (after watching tons of babies and knowing lots of them and having a dd before him) We gave up nursing and just gave him a bottle which he did better with and seemed happier with.

A few days ago some friends on fb were asking about lip tie. Then one posted a pic of her sons and it hit me like a ton of bricks! My son has a big gap between his teeth...let me check. Sure enough, he seems to have a tie going all the way between his teeth and connecting to the roof of his mouth. Dr. Google tells me this is the worst kind of lip tie (most severe) and that he possibly has posterior tongue tie as well since they seem to go hand in hand.

Ryan is our last baby. For 5 mths I FOUGHT him to nurse. He hated me for it. He would yell and scream and kick and hit and bite and scratch and twist and turn. I was in tears every time I tried to feed him. I felt like a failure for quitting and 7 mths later have finally started to feel a tad better about it. But now...now I am HURT! I am MAD! Why did no one see this? I didn't know what to look for...but his ped and the LC should have, right? I feel betrayed. But most of all....I feel totally jipped out of my little nursling! I am all for extended nursing. My daughter stopped when I got preggo with ds on her own at 11.5 mths old. I was sad....but she didn't want mama milk anymore when I got preggo. And then my baby...my little boy....had a problem that made nursing hard for him and I DIDN'T SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!

So please....what do we do now? He has a nice big gap between his front teeth and I know it could affect speech but we don't know that yet. I don't wanna wait until his speech is screwed up before we do something for him. Should we correct it? What exactly happens? Is it pretty bad or very minor?

His is bad according to Dr. Google. His connects all the way to the roof of his mouth. How did I not notice???

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Old 02-09-2013, 02:48 PM   #2
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

Been there. Except mine didn't latch... I pumped for 4 months trying to get him to latch.

I didn't find out he had a lip tie until he was 9 months old. This would not have made a difference for us, I would not have clipped it. well, actually maybe I would have switched to formula sooner and saved my mental health. I did know that he had a posterior tongue tie. He has a small gap in his teeth, though he did have the most severe lip tie. Don't do anything, he will probably tear it on his own. That sounds terrible I know, but he'll bump himself or something most likely. Mine fell down a few weeks ago and tore it. it bled a little and he cried, but it wasn't a huge deal. If you leave it alone, it will likely do that. But, if it doesn't, he could have gapped teeth and in rare situations speech issues. But that's not likely. I'd leave it alone, and then if it's still around when he is older, reassess.
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Old 02-09-2013, 02:53 PM   #3
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

My daughter has a bad lip tie. We have had trouble breastfeeding. I noticed it at ten months old. She is seeing a dentist this week and I'm going to get her opinion on it. I hate the big gap (even though it's cute)

I never noticed it either though, so don't feel bad.
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Old 02-09-2013, 03:04 PM   #4
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

My 3 year old has a severe one, ties to his upper palate. We discovered it after he weaned, which was around 18 months. He got teeth very late, only starting at 14 months, so we would have never noticed it (other than an incredibly painful 18 months of nursing!)
Unfortunately current medical advice is usually if they have weaned, they need to wait until the permanant teeth are coming in to clip it, if it doesn't tear on its own before then. If you clip it prior, it can and often reforms, just like scar tissue. Then, you have to do surgery twice (which requires general anesthesia for the older toddlers, infants usually don't require it). We consulted with a peditrician, dentist and an ENT. I am watching for speech delays, but so far he is just as chatty as his sisters
Had we caught it as an infant I would have done it, but I didn't even know it was a problem since his teeth were in late. I will say, at 2 years old the gap in his teeth was huge, now at age 3 it is barely noticible, as he has gotten older, and the teeth bigger, it is thinning the tie by a lot, so hopefully the surgery will be less tissue to clip if it hasn't resolved itself when he is older.
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Old 02-09-2013, 04:26 PM   #5
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

Shannon. I don't have much for advice, but I'd take him to the Dr and tell them they need to check this out and do something about it. Don't ask if they think he has it, tell them he does and that you want it corrected.
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Old 02-09-2013, 05:34 PM   #6
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I've never heard the "wait til they have their permanent teeth" advice. Their are specialists who work with TT/LT almost exclusively. Most peds and even lc's miss posterior TT which almost always goes hand in hand with upper lip tie. The lip tie was prob not the issue, but a tongue tie. Many pediatric dentists miss this. I strongly recommend joining the fb group I told you about, msg me and I'll give you the name of my friend.
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Old 02-09-2013, 05:40 PM   #7
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Hugs.... I took my dd to an ENT when she was a few weeks because I felt she was tongue tied, he said no. So I dropped it. We had a very difficult time nursing and she self weaned at 6 months. At her 2 yo well baby her pediatrician told me she is lip tied. How the HE-DOUBLE HOCKEYSTICKS did the ENT not notice this! Ugghhhh
Good luck.

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Old 02-09-2013, 05:44 PM   #8
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

Quote:
Originally Posted by bluedaisyma View Post
I've never heard the "wait til they have their permanent teeth" advice. Their are specialists who work with TT/LT almost exclusively. Most peds and even lc's miss posterior TT which almost always goes hand in hand with upper lip tie. The lip tie was prob not the issue, but a tongue tie. Many pediatric dentists miss this. I strongly recommend joining the fb group I told you about, msg me and I'll give you the name of my friend.
In our case, the LT was the issue. my DS had full tongue movement and a well formed palate despite the minor posterior TT.
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Old 02-09-2013, 07:13 PM   #9
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

http://www.facebook.com/groups/tonguetiebabies/ I've been there, mama. This is a great group to join to ask questions.
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Old 02-09-2013, 07:25 PM   #10
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Re: I am mad. I am hurt. Lip tie....

I'm sorry that you are hurting over your nursing experience.

DS3 has a severe lip tie and mild tongue tie. Thankfully nursing is going well but there was a time that I was researching procedures regarding his lip. For me, the aftercare that I would have to do to the wound was enough for me to decide not to do anything.

Also, both our Ped. and Ped. Dentist do not recommend doing anything.

Sounds like you are now at a place where you have to do your own research and make the decision that is best for you and your LO.
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