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Old 02-01-2013, 03:24 PM   #11
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

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Originally Posted by Kiliki View Post
I have 3 kids and never scheduled any of them, they just all came with their own schedule.

It was typically something like this - every 2-3 hours nurse, then play, then sleep, repeat.

I actually don't understand the purpose of scheduling a newborn. They already have their own natural rhythm/schedule and it's pretty easy to follow once you figure it out.

I am not being at all sarcastic.

Is that what you mean by "scheduling" ?

ETA: I'm sorry, I have to apologize b/c even with the "not being sarcastic" it still DOES read that way, doesn't it? I truly wasn't trying to be. I am actually genuinely curious about the reasons for scheduling a newborn. Please no one be offended.
DS was a crazy lazy nurser and he NEVER slept after the first week. Like never! I ended up with mastitis twice because he lazily nursed (half asleep and never stayed awake during a feeding) for 30-40 minutes every 1 1/2 hours or more. DH couldn't even sleep because DS wanted to be attached to me 24/7 (not doable with a 12 month old DD haha) Everyone in my house was miserable. We scheduled his feedings and made him wait 3 hours. We offered a pacifier and interacted with him, but no nursing. After that he slept better, I had no more problems nursing and everyone was generally happier. He literally never cried after we made the change. Totally different than with my DD, but that's what worked for him.

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Old 02-01-2013, 03:52 PM   #12
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

I had two that naturally fell into a schdule of sleep, eat, awake. It wasn't set by the clock but after awhile there were pretty predictiable times.

Now i have a baby that no matter what I do I can't get to be pradictibale on anything. She is a horrible napper, as in doesn't do it very often, yet isn't alll that fussy.
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Old 02-01-2013, 03:57 PM   #13
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

We are a scheduling family as are most of our closest friends.
We are a Babywise family, in so much as its the framework we follow and adjust to fit our needs and our baby.
There are several threads on DS I have posted to over the years about scheduling. We begin by 3 days of life for daytime routine, very loose and flexible. By 2 weeks we are grooving more scheduled and predictable.
I have scheduled all of mine, as have 6 of my friends, totaling nearly 40 children between us. All of them have taken similarly to the schedule and done similarly well on it. I've met lots of parents who can't handle a schedule, but no children .
In a nutshell (as I'm running out for a birthday party... feel free to PM me), I begin with the first nursing of the morning. Full meal. Keep your baby awake an appropriate amount of time until sleep cues (many babies show these in similar time intervals... more by PM if you'd like), lay down immediately for nap as that is when they are most receptive to self soothing and self sleep. Wake up 3 hours from beginning of previous nursing. Keep awake after eating, nap, repeat. We don't schedule at night and never will. If the daytime works, the nighttime takes care of itself usually.
In general what I have noticed is Families with unscheduled children are far more flexible in their ability to be out and about and have children who can catch catnaps in strollers and cars, etc... They often work for sleep, rocking, singing, babywearing, etc... Naps are given up earlier, uninterrupted nighttime sleep happens much later.
Scheduled families have deep sleepers who are happy to go to nap and to bed, and nap longer, with early STTN that often lasts longterm. However, we are "nap nazis", with children who prefer to be sleeping in their beds daily at similar times. We are off the radar in the afternoon and often tied more to the rhythm of our children's sleep. These are generalizations and what I have personally experienced and learned from working with families.
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Old 02-01-2013, 03:59 PM   #14
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

We are a scheduling family not just routine. I am happy to answer any questions you may have. Flames long ago stopped burning me . We are scheduled with our newborns by 3 weeks for sure, often they are grooving with it by 2 weeks. Of course, there are off days, growth spurts, etc... on an occasional basis.
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Old 02-01-2013, 04:35 PM   #15
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

We do more of a structured routine....not a stressfully strict schedule. A few books i like are The Baby Whisperer and Happiest Baby on the Block. Routine has worked very well for all my kids and I also put my daycare babies on a routine.

Here is what my 10 week old is doing and he is my fourth child.

Wakes about 730 and I do wake him after a certain point if he doesnt on his own
Eat
Play
Nap from 9 to 11
Eat
Play
Nap from 1 to 3
Eat
Play
Nap from 5 to 6
Eat
Play
we cluster feed in the evening and tank him up for the night
He is down by 830ish and sleeps till about 4am. sometimes will do one dream feed around 10pm (basically i feed him without waking him)
so he is doing 11 hours at night and only waking once and he is exclusively breast fed and in the 95% for height and weight so its not like i am starving him

all my kids were sleeping 12 hours thru the night from about 5 to 8 months old and yes, i breast fed all! I also delay solids so its not like they were filling up with solids.

my kids sleep on their own in their own beds during the day. the newborn co sleeps at night if he needs to. I am a nap nazi. my kids nap faithfully at home every day and it is a sacrifice for our family. they dont sleep well anywhere else but thats fine with me because they do wonderfully at home in bed. we dont run them all over town at all hours. that works for some people, not for us. we also do scheduled meal times. i dont let me kids snack all day, carry a cup around or anything else. food is at the table with the family. we can take all four out to eat with no issues (they are under 6 years old).

I personally dont understand why people frown on routine oriented families. my kids are well adjusted and well behaved and a big part of that is the daily routine, daily rest, and good full meals. i know we are annoying to others because of the nap thing but i dont care about that. there is no way i would trade my nap rules for a kid that only naps randomly in the car and is still up all night at 1 and 2 years old.

i am not saying that other ways cant work. i just dont understand why more people dont try routines if they are complaining about their current method. it is hard work though and dedication.

Last edited by doodah; 02-01-2013 at 04:42 PM.
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Old 02-01-2013, 05:11 PM   #16
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

I scheduled my little one from the get go. It kind of worked. I did exactly what these ladies have been telling you but up until about a week ago he would still wake up at 4 for a bottle. Napped fine etc. just needed that bottle. He would go back to sleep right away. If you are going to go the scheduling route go for it! I think it does work I am just giving you a fair warning that for some kids it might take a little longer to go the whole 12 hours.

He did start sleeping through until 4 at a VERY young age. I want to say it was around 8 weeks...and he's huge so no worries there!
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Old 02-01-2013, 05:26 PM   #17
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Interesting info, I think I'll do some research on baby wise. Thanks!
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Old 02-01-2013, 05:29 PM   #18
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

I did the ferber method of self soothing at 6 months. So glad I did. Right from when she was little I started a bedtime routine and would lay her down when she was tired but not asleep. She took a soother the first 6 months and slept great. Then she wouldn't take it and started crying. I'd let her cry for 5 mins, go in and sooth her and then let her cry 5 mins more. She rarely cried more than 10 mins. Now that she's a year I'll let her cry longer but I hardly ever need too. Even at nap time she'll cry for 2 mins and then sleep. Almost every night she doesn't cry at all. She used to wake up to nurse at 4am until 10 or 11 months and then dropped it on her own. I also use a white noise machine when she sleeps.
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Old 02-01-2013, 06:20 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by doodah View Post
I personally dont understand why people frown on routine oriented families. my kids are well adjusted and well behaved and a big part of that is the daily routine, daily rest, and good full meals. i know we are annoying to others because of the nap thing but i dont care about that. there is no way i would trade my nap rules for a kid that only naps randomly in the car and is still up all night at 1 and 2 years old.
Just wanted to say for me personally I don't frown on "routine oriented" families . I personally prefer more flexibility and letting baby set their own routine, but that doesn't work for everyone. The problem I have is those unfortunate people who ignore babies cues in favor of rigid scheduling, often out of ignorance I think the two situations are completely different and if everyone is happy and healthy then to each their own!
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Old 02-01-2013, 06:29 PM   #20
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Re: Moms of scheduled newborns

I use baby wise but I do consider it more of a routine rather than a set schedule. I have used it with all 5 of our kiddos and will use it again with my little guy due in 17 days.

I actually blogged about it, week-by-week, with my last son:
http://makinghome.blogspot.com/2010/...eek-1.html?m=1

That's a very detailed 7-part account of how things went for us. I wrote it as I went. If you have specific questions, I'd be glad to try to help.
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