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Old 02-07-2013, 11:13 PM   #21
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Re: Play Date Issues.

If I got an email from another mom saying something like " hey I'm new here, I'd love to get to know you so our kids can friends" I would totally roll with it. You don't know me from Adam. I would expect you to be cautious when it came to play dates.

I think you can be honest with the other mom.

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Old 02-08-2013, 05:11 AM   #22
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Re: Play Date Issues.

I wouldn't let my kids go to a family's house where we don't know the parents. If they want to have a playdate, I would just say, "When do we all come over? It'll be so nice to visit with another mom while the kids play!". Or suggest meeting up for a library story time and lunch afterwards...
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Old 02-08-2013, 05:24 AM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NotLad
If I got an email from another mom saying something like " hey I'm new here, I'd love to get to know you so our kids can friends" I would totally roll with it. You don't know me from Adam. I would expect you to be cautious when it came to play dates.

I think you can be honest with the other mom.
This and the above poster. You don't have to have had a bad experience to be cautious. I was like that with my older kids and will be when it comes up for my littles and my dh will be way more so.
It's even weird to me now for my 16 yr old to go to friends houses when I don't know the parents. But he has 100's of friends and I can't meet all of them.
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Old 02-08-2013, 05:25 AM   #24
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Re: Play Date Issues.

I am the same way as far as no alone time with people we don't know well.

But- IMO, it sounds like, with as busy as you are, YOU need some down time as well- and since you are in a new area- why not email her or call and say- hey- we would love to come over- we've only got an hour, but would love to get to know you guys! You never know- you just may find a new friend in this kid's mom!
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Old 02-08-2013, 05:50 AM   #25
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Re: Play Date Issues.

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Originally Posted by luvsviola View Post
I'd email and invite them to go bowling or somewhere as a meetup til you get to know the mom better. Maybe invite them to lunch on a Saturday. Carve out a few hours for him.
I agree with this. It's just a few hours of your time. I also don't think there's an expectation that you just drop him off. Just make it clear that you will be there with him and then that's what it is. I also don't think you need to go into any detail at all about why. Some moms drop off, some moms stay. No explanations required.
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Old 02-08-2013, 07:25 AM   #26
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Re: Play Date Issues.

I wouldnt think twice about it if a friends mom wanted to stay while the kids played, id probably enjoy having another adult to talk with. Especially a new friend, there are very very very few (actually only 2) of my kids friends that i would be comfortable leaving the kids for a playdate, but those 2 moms are also close friends of mine, not someone new
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Old 02-08-2013, 07:41 AM   #27
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Re: Play Date Issues.

Personaly I would email the mom back and just tell her what is going on. You just moved, unpacking, very prego, but want to get to know them.

I would expect the mom to stay especially if we haven't met before.

If I got that kind of email I would invite everyone over for an hour or so so the boys could play I could get to know the neighbors.

It might be good idea to get to know her now, before the baby comes, so that when you are busy with the baby the boys could go to her house and play.

I was so thankful for our neighbors that we got to know last summer when they moved in cause a few times this winter when they invited my older boys over or stayed outside with them while I was inside feeding the baby. They sent them home after a half hour or so.
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Old 02-08-2013, 08:01 AM   #28
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Re: Play Date Issues.

I don't let my son go to people's houses that I don't know well, either! I go to all birthday parties with him. When I have birthday parties I have kids that get dropped off and I DON'T get it. You don't know me? How can you just leave your kids with me? Just email the other mom. Let her know that you are uncomfortable letting him go by himself. That you would like to accompany him. Since, her son keeps asking yours to come over she may feel the exact same way!
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Old 02-08-2013, 08:06 AM   #29
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Re: Play Date Issues.

Could you have a meet n greet with the parents? That is what I do, I go to their house, talk with them for a bit, have coffee, whatever. And vice-versa. My daughter has a really great friend and has a playdate 1-2x a week!
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Old 02-08-2013, 09:01 AM   #30
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My kids are only 5 and 3 but it will be a long time before I leave them at a party or playdate. I think of playdates as mommy dates too. I invite the kid and mom over with an invitation for "coffee and a chat" while the kids play. Perhaps you could invite them to your place? That way If the mom doesn't want to stay at least you can keep an eye on things.

I don't think you're strange. I am super overprotective too, and don't even have a good reason for it. I just am. I pulled 5 year old DD out of sparks because I had a problem with all the sleepovers and other activities I had to leave her at.
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