Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
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Old 11-26-2014, 12:10 PM   #1
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I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

I mean, technically my choices have led to me being a single mom; but part of it is that I just haven't found anyone yet who seems like good 'life partner' material. Neither of my pregnancies were planned, but because of my personal ethics, I chose/have chosen to have, and raise, both of my babies. I'm not bitter or resentful about this at all, BTW. I love my son, and I know I will love my second son as well. Being a mom is one of the best things that ever happened to me. At this point, I'm kind of on the fence about how I feel about the 'life partner' thing, or if I could even ever find someone who'd be a good match for me in that sense.

Single moms of multiples, with multiple fathers, would be most welcome. I struggle a lot with having 2 kids from 2 fathers, and it would be so nice to feel like I'm not alone. Trying to date in the position I'm in right now in my life seems totally futile.

Well, that seems like a weird note to end things on, but hi!


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man has conquered whole nations, but all his armies could not conquer love.
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Old 01-05-2015, 07:30 PM   #2
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Re: I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

Hello! I just have one boy, but I'm definitely with you- I'm so happy to be a mom, but a single mom.. it's hard to describe to people on the outside. And I also have no idea how to have a normal "dating relationship". *sigh*
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Old 05-08-2015, 07:39 PM   #3
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Re: I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

I'm a single mom with two kids. The first one was from my ex-husband and the second one by choice. I love being a mom and feel my life is full raising my two girls. Because my marriage didn't work out, I'm happier being on my own. We are surrounded by traditional families though, and I'm wondering whether I should make more effort to get to know other single moms just to not feel so alone.. .
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Old 05-23-2015, 08:22 PM   #4
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Re: I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

I'm now raising my four alone. I left my DH last august after an incident of violence. and i'm still getting used to life without him. I know you said you wanted to address issues of having multiples with different fathers... and that's not me. I mostly wanted to respond because (like you said) there is no way I can see myself ever dating (normally or otherwise) and I don't think I would ever trust another man to help raise my kids.

Most people won't get it, but I kinda hope you ladies will: I don't think I would trust the motivations of any man that *wanted* to date a single mother of 4, y'know? What attractive, self sufficient guy is going to look at me and say "wow! I would love to take on all your baggage and help with four kids that aren't mine <3" LOL. ((gallows humor))

That is to say, I'm actually pretty ok with being alone, rather than dealing with all that effort. and like the OP said... I don't think I will ever find anyone that would fit me well as a life partner anyway.

So, HI! glad to know there are others walking this road.

Minimal, Communal, Earthy, Crafty Loving Single-Mama to C E : R and baby D
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Old 06-04-2015, 12:39 AM   #5
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Re: I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

Agh! I so wish you were near me Sageac! I left an abusive ex while preggo with #4.

I have dated, but it is hard when you are really considering your kids. I finally hit the I trust no one place. I actually want at least one more and I am considering going it alone.
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Old 06-26-2015, 04:32 PM   #6
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Re: I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

Wow, you aren't getting your wish on the multiple father portion, but willing support from other single mothers in the same situation is still great. Right? My children are from one father as well, but I feel much like the other singe moms here. I am in the I don't trust anyone stage, and why would you want to be with me and my kids *****-eyed look*. I've thought about going out again, but I'm bordering on the never again! strike.
Its not good enough to wish, wishes are but the whispers of the heart. Dream, because dreams are those wishes put into action. I hope all your dreams come true ~ With the best of good.
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Old 06-27-2015, 05:59 AM   #7
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Re: I can't be the only single mom by circumstance...

I am a single mother of one child. I raise her alone. I want to marry desperately. I just cannot date. I spent all my time with my child. I also question the motivation of men who would want to date me. I am overweight and have a small child. I have next to no free time and I work a low paying job. I wouldn't want to date the male version of me, haha.
Single mama to my sweet little girl [03/27/2012]
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