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Old 03-11-2013, 05:34 AM   #1
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Help!! My DD is a hoarder.

She is only 5 but she cannot seem to get rid of anything. She cries if she outgrows clothes and we donate them. She gets really upset if I suggest she gets rid of coloring papers. I used to toss her old coloring books/pages away after a while when she would be sleeping but now she remembers everything. I tossed her class newsletter on Friday (just typed words on a white paper) she cannot read so I read it to her first but she was hysterical that I wanted to get rid of it.

What can't do to help her (help me, because her stuff is killing me) let go. We already have a bin to keep "important" stuff she makes/colors but we just cannot keep all of it.


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Old 03-11-2013, 05:46 AM   #2
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I call my four yo baby horder all the time. I just sneak stuff out when she isn't looking. She literally cried for hours when we took the Christmas tree down. She saved a branch to remember it by......
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Old 03-11-2013, 11:06 AM   #3
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Re: Help!! My DD is a hoarder.

My 8yo used to be like that... when we did our huge stuffed animal purge he didn't want to get rid of any. I felt like I was traumatizing him for life! What I did was let each kid pick a certain # of stuffies (can't remember the number now...) then put them all in a small box. Now the box is our limit (other than 2 on their beds) and if the box gets full they need to decide what goes and what stays.

I think the idea of limits could be helpful and I think it's something kids understand (and crave). Maybe giving your daughter a small box to keep her papers and telling her when it's full she needs to decide what goes??

I've put limits on lots of my children's belongings. One shelf for their books, one drawer for junk, one basket for hair stuff, four video games each... having concrete limits is much more understandable than just an abstract "we don't really need that anymore"...

Also, as an encouragement, my packrat son has become quite the purger. When we recently went through our books he had no problem deciding what he wanted to keep and what he wanted to purge. I really never thought he would get there, but I think our family minimizing has helped him overcome some of his hoarding tendencies...
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Old 03-11-2013, 11:52 AM   #4
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Re: Help!! My DD is a hoarder.

My 9YO used to be like that. It usually gets better with time. I used to purge without her consent, but only things like clothes she totally outgrew, toys she broke, etc. We would take time to discuss toys that she had outgrown but were still intact. Since she had a December bday, she has now come to expect a big toy purge in November to make room for new things. Clothes, however, she still has trouble with.

So we now go through clothes together at the change of each season or when she has had a big growth spurt. I make her try everything on, and we purge anything too small, stained, or doesn't coordinate with what's left. She always wants me to fix things that are torn, add ruffles to things that are too short , etc. And we consider it, but usually I can get away with put it in the purge pile for now, and we will see if we still need it after we are done - and we never do. Then we assess everything that is left, and determine what she needs that isn't there. That's a huge motivator for her, getting to justify buying new things.

But before she turned 8, I did most of it on the sly. So now she's very leery of not being included. I just sent 5 garbage bags of clothes to donate, and she had to see for herself that none of them were her clothes . I wish I had started including her in the process earlier. My other two, they have no issues purging stuff that doesn't fit any more. I think you have to modify what you do with each kid.
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Old 03-11-2013, 12:56 PM   #5
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Re: Help!! My DD is a hoarder.

Yep my almost three year old I always say that she will be on an episode of hoarders in 40 years.
Wifey to amazing hubby Nick (3/7/09) and mommy to my sweet dd Avalon Maysan (4/4/10): sweet dd Paisley Larue (8/9/11) and my handsome little man Zadok Alasdair (05/24/13)
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