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Old 03-12-2013, 10:51 AM   #1
sewmany
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How do you get socialization in?

I'm really thinking of homeschooling. However, DH doesn't think the kids will get enough socialization. I know that's not true, but I would like some ideas to present to him.

So what do you do?

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Old 03-12-2013, 11:16 AM   #2
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

Church, Sunday school, piano lessons, Awanas, sports, co-op, grocery store, play dates....there are plenty of opportunities for socialization!
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:29 AM   #3
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

Hi there sewmany!

Thanks for asking this. I know this is a fear of most parents have before they start homeschooling but I really don't believe he should worry. Homeschoolers are doing SO many different activities that it is really hard not to socialize.

We go to a literature circle on Mondays and my 4 DDs were there w/ about 10 other kids for 6 hours. Talk about socialization! They did the literature discussion for about an hour and the rest of the time they play and hang out. We love going there.

We also have several other social opportunities. We were @ the art museum on Sunday. We took friends and we were there for a family program. We visit museums and seek out other fun opportunities.

I never worry about my children having enough social connect w/ others because if anything we do too much. Not that I think it is they are socializing too much but it is good to be home sometimes and to just relax.

If your DH is concerned why not let him meet face to face w/ some other HSers? You could go to a HSing group and get to know them. Maybe this will help him be more at ease.

best wishes and feel free to ask us more questions.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:31 AM   #4
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

How many kids do you have, and what are their ages?

My kids are 4 and almost 6, and they are best friends. I REALLY like that my kids are learning to have long term, close relationships with siblings (and other kids they encounter in real life) rather than having many, much less significant with large amounts of classmates over the years.

(Honestly I think the socialization a child gets in "real" school is unhealthy, in many many ways.)

Ds is almost6, most of his socialization comes from playing at the park with neighborhood friends, tumbling class, his sister and cousins, a few homeschooled friends, a church group he goes to every once in a while, playing with kids at the bigger parks at the weekend, family members, and all the many interactions with ppl of various ages we encouter all the time.

Even though I am *very* shy, and I'd say even "socially impaired", I do think ds gets a healthy amount of social interaction. When he was in a prek class at age 4, 16 hours a week, the pressure was more than he could take. All the negative feelings involved in being in a class full of other kids all day, almost every day, was weighing very heavily on him. (not saying all kids are like that, but many are. Some ppl just don't thrive with SO many social requirements on them). Now that he is hsed, he is much happier, much more confident, and when he does spend time with other kids it's a healthier, happier, more natural thing for him.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:58 AM   #5
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We do HS classes once a week, piano lessons, sports, church, and they play with friends in the neighborhood pretty frequently. My niece that is in PS is always getting in trouble for socialization...lol! Aside from a bit of playground time they don't really get to socialize that much in her class.
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Old 03-12-2013, 12:09 PM   #6
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

At the moment, church activities, homeschool bowling league, play dates, library, shopping. We have done dance classes in the past, as well as tumbling. We've done homeschool groups with various outings and classes before. Last month we went to a special children's program at a local museum.

Socialization is learning how to interact with other people appropriately. That can be done in so many ways and in so many places. Going out to eat and having your children speak to the waiter/waitress to order food or ask for ketchup is socialization. Talking to the lady cutting their hair is socialization. Playing with other children at the park counts, as well.
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Old 03-12-2013, 12:40 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tallanvor
<<snip>>

Socialization is learning how to interact with other people appropriately......<<snip>>well.
I agree and really think this is easier to accomplish (and more likely to happen) when children have more time to reflect, more one on one attention by someone who wishes to teach then appropriate/healthy interaction, less (not constant) social input that requires immediate response from the child, less peer pressure, less draining academic demands like homework and things that are either below or above the child's capabilities, etc

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Old 03-12-2013, 01:44 PM   #8
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

Quote:
Originally Posted by RainandRedemption View Post
How many kids do you have, and what are their ages?

My kids are 4 and almost 6, and they are best friends. I REALLY like that my kids are learning to have long term, close relationships with siblings (and other kids they encounter in real life) rather than having many, much less significant with large amounts of classmates over the years.

(Honestly I think the socialization a child gets in "real" school is unhealthy, in many many ways.)

Ds is almost6, most of his socialization comes from playing at the park with neighborhood friends, tumbling class, his sister and cousins, a few homeschooled friends, a church group he goes to every once in a while, playing with kids at the bigger parks at the weekend, family members, and all the many interactions with ppl of various ages we encouter all the time.

Even though I am *very* shy, and I'd say even "socially impaired", I do think ds gets a healthy amount of social interaction. When he was in a prek class at age 4, 16 hours a week, the pressure was more than he could take. All the negative feelings involved in being in a class full of other kids all day, almost every day, was weighing very heavily on him. (not saying all kids are like that, but many are. Some ppl just don't thrive with SO many social requirements on them). Now that he is hsed, he is much happier, much more confident, and when he does spend time with other kids it's a healthier, happier, more natural thing for him.
I agree with this. My boys have each other and that is a far more important and lasting relationship than the transient relationships they would have with 20-30 kids they would meet for a year in a classroom. I have 1 friend left from high school and no other friends from my school years (I was public schooled). I also have social issues so public schooling didn't do much for me socially.

As far as social outlets we are involved in Taekwondo at least 4 days a week, my oldest has been with the school for 4 years, my youngest for 2.5 and I started 1year ago. Dh is an instructor now and we know everyone there. Many of the kids are long term students so they form lasting friendships and it is very family centered. My youngest son and dh are also involved in Roller Derby. It started with my youngest wanting to join a juniors team that was sponsored by the only MRDA team in TX. The juniors team fell apart but DH had already joined the men's team and Tharen stayed on as well. So we are now involved with Roller Derby. Tharen hangs out with the guys like he was one of them, no big deal, and has made quite a few friends that way. We keep our weekends fairly full between TKD and derby commitments. Of course we also have friends who are close like family and our boys love to be with their children who are like cousins to them. So they get plenty of chances to interact with other people, but not just children their own age, babies, toddlers, older children and adults too.
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Old 03-12-2013, 01:51 PM   #9
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

Quote:
Originally Posted by RainandRedemption View Post
How many kids do you have, and what are their ages?

My kids are 4 and almost 6, and they are best friends. I REALLY like that my kids are learning to have long term, close relationships with siblings (and other kids they encounter in real life) rather than having many, much less significant with large amounts of classmates over the years.

(Honestly I think the socialization a child gets in "real" school is unhealthy, in many many ways.)

Ds is almost6, most of his socialization comes from playing at the park with neighborhood friends, tumbling class, his sister and cousins, a few homeschooled friends, a church group he goes to every once in a while, playing with kids at the bigger parks at the weekend, family members, and all the many interactions with ppl of various ages we encouter all the time.

Even though I am *very* shy, and I'd say even "socially impaired", I do think ds gets a healthy amount of social interaction. When he was in a prek class at age 4, 16 hours a week, the pressure was more than he could take. All the negative feelings involved in being in a class full of other kids all day, almost every day, was weighing very heavily on him. (not saying all kids are like that, but many are. Some ppl just don't thrive with SO many social requirements on them). Now that he is hsed, he is much happier, much more confident, and when he does spend time with other kids it's a healthier, happier, more natural thing for him.
This is very interesting. I think my DS might be in the same boat. He currently has prek 5 days a week, 3 hours each day. He doesn' especially want to go to "school," although he doesn't complain. When he comes home, he is super irritable and I've been attributing it to being tired. Presenting it the way you just did makes me think that this might actually be more of DS's issue. He often talks about who got in trouble or yelled or wouldn't sit still (like he notices everything that stands out from the norm). It is possible that he is just overwhelmed by all the stimulation. Hmmm, thanks for this perspective!

Quote:
Originally Posted by 7mom7 View Post
We do HS classes once a week, piano lessons, sports, church, and they play with friends in the neighborhood pretty frequently. My niece that is in PS is always getting in trouble for socialization...lol! Aside from a bit of playground time they don't really get to socialize that much in her class.
I was a classroom teacher for 4 years and this is very true. In first grade, the kids had two 30 minute recesses. This first was combined with snack, so the kids had a snack from home and a carton of milk to drink before they played. The rest of the day was seated in the classroom, standing in the hall, going to the bathroom, etc. Everything was scheduled and there was little to no talking allowed beyond recess. The principal and I went round and round about this and we finally agreed to disagree (well, she didn't but I did what I wanted to anyway. ). I had reading workshop once a week for an hour where the kids each had their own book to read, but if they came to a word they couldn't decode or they didn't understand something, they were allowed to work through it with the person next to them. Surprisingly they did a great job helping each other and not getting too far off track (although that did happen). The whole "socializing" concept of reading sent the principal over the edge. I kind of enjoyed annoying her.
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Old 03-12-2013, 02:05 PM   #10
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Re: How do you get socialization in?

Sorry to get off-track. In response to the actual question, my kids are involved in different activities.

DD1: 4-H, Volleyball (nearly year round on 4 or 5 various teams), Archery, texting her friends and having friends over, Girl Scouts-even though her troop isn't very active

DD2: 4-H, Soccer (Spring and Fall), Basketball (Winter), Girl Scouts-a really active troop that has all of her friends from the sports she plays. In the fall, she'll be old enough to participate in school sports, so she'll pick up volleyball and track as well.

DS: Soccer (first time this spring) and tagging along with the girls at their events. There are similar aged siblings at everything we do with the girls and he has made friends there. He also goes to pre-k and sees some of those kids beyond school (playdates, b-day parties, etc.)
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