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Old 03-19-2013, 01:12 AM   #1
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Unhappy Why do I feel so lazy??

I seriously feel like a waste of life. I can't keep up with my house, we eat take out almost every day cause I don't cook. Not only that, but i'm too tired to go grocery shopping. When I'm home alone with the kids, even the though of having to pack them up to go ANYWHERE is just so overwhelming to me. Then when my husband is home, I finally have an adult to talk to, that I don't want to leave to be by myself again. I have 2 kids who are only getting their basic needs met, nothing more. My son who's almost 3 always wants me to play with him in his room, but I just cant get myself to sit in there for more than 5 minutes before going and laying on the couch. I find myself laying on the couch a lot. Even sitting up for long periods of time is hard. I'm dreading summer cause that means the kids will be wanting to go outside, and that means that I will have to go out too, and I just don't want to. I'm a sahm not by choice, but because we can't afford day care. I've tried finding jobs to work around my husbands schedule and no one ever calls back. I feel like this is all my life is ever going to be.... Laying on my couch while the kids run around like lunatics and drive me crazy to the point that I explode on them several times a day and send them to their rooms. It's just exhausting and never ending. I just want a break! I feel like i'm a terrible mom and human being because i'm so lazy. I hear moms talking about teaching their kids things, playing with them, doing arts and crafts, going for walks, exersizing, and then there's me. I lay on the couch and get upset when my son doesn't want to sit in a chair and watch his cartoons so I don't have to get up and do anything. I want to change and become a better person, and mom, but I just don't know what to do. Everything I do just seems pointless. I pick up the toys, and they just get drug out again. I wash the dishes, and they just get dirty again. I wipe off the table, and it just gets sticky again. So why bother?

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Old 03-19-2013, 01:53 AM   #2
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How old are your kids? Do you have or does it run in your family -depression?
I think you need to make an appt with your family dr and tell them this. Or you need to have a break for 3 -4 hrs one day per week. Are you getting enough sleep.

You should try going in a walk with your kids tomorrow. Let them burn off energy and getting outside will help you feel better.

Hugs I am sorry you feel this way.

Sometimes I am overwhelmed by housework too.

I just printed off a weekly chore chart. Maybe try doing this and getting your 4-5 daily chores done before letting yourself lay on the couch.

I try to do
breakfast
Chore
Play w/dd
Chore
Play w/dd
Lunch
Chore
Play w/dd
Chore

Or if I am really antsy and wanna just bang out the chores I just do them all in a row.
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Old 03-19-2013, 08:27 AM   #3
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Re: Why do I feel so lazy??

I agree with the PP. I definitely have lazy days but if it's that consistent you may want to talk to a professional about it. And as much as you don't want to, i find that it helps so much if I take the kids outside for a bit. Even if it's just in the backyard. They get energy out, and I get energy just from sitting out in the sun.
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Old 03-19-2013, 08:46 AM   #4
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Re: Why do I feel so lazy??

I don't know if you have good insurance or not...But, I'd start with a physical first. Then, look into depression.

Although, if it isn't Thyroid or something like that, I think you are just seriously bored. I'd hate to send you for medication for boredom. I don't know a good boredom buster either... I think you have to find a way to get out of the rut you are in. Maybe a combination of doing something with the kids, and doing something without the kids?
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:20 AM   #5
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Re: Why do I feel so lazy??

I would get your thyroid checked first. I was like that when my thyroid was low. I could barely move. I felt a million times better once on thyroid meds.
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:44 AM   #6
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Re: Why do I feel so lazy??

I do agree getting a physical to check to see if there's something like a thyroid problem, etc.

But, if it's not, sometimes you just gotta stop complaining about being so lazy and actually get up and do it. Sometimes there is a physical problem, there's depression going on, chemical or hormone imbalances, etc. But, sometimes, you just have to look in the mirror and say "the problem with my laziness is this person right here in the mirror." And then you get up off your butt and you haul the kids out to the park, complaining the whole way about what a pain it is to get them loaded in the car.

Sometimes, it's about "inertia." You remember learning about inertia in school? That a body in motion tends to stay in motion, and a body at rest tends to stay at rest? It's not just a law of physics, I think it's a law of real life too. The more we sit on our butts, the more we tend to sit on our butts. And, the more active we are, the more we tend to stay active. It's DIFFICULT to break that inertia. The longer we have been sitting the harder it is. BUT, once you get going and you get into doing XYZ, then you tend to KEEP going.

On the playing with the kids in their rooms....there are not a lot of people that REALLY enjoy that. I don't. Not when they are 3 or playing cars or whatever. Give me a family board game and I can manage that. Three yr old pretend...not so much. I find that rather than let them initiate, setting them up with something like making playdough or whatever, much more up my ally. And, if you get them set up and play for a little bit, sometimes, you can sneak away and get whatever done that you are going to get done. It's completely normal for playing legos with a 3 yr old to drive a mom totally batty.

On the finding a job...you can't just apply and hope they call. A job might just very well be what you need. But you have to be active about going and getting it. My daughter works at the movie theater around the corner. It took her almost TWO MONTHS of checking back, calling, going in, asking to talk to someone, to get this job and actually start working. At one point they lost the paperwork she had turned in and she would never ever have known if she hadn't gone in to ask about it. Once when my DH was looking for a job, he turned in his application, wouldn't call wouldn't call, I finally talked him into it, they scheduled his interview on that phone call. I know that he wouldn't have gotten a call from them if he hadn't called them back. If you want a job, you have to be VERY active about going and getting it.
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Old 03-19-2013, 09:45 AM   #7
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Re: Why do I feel so lazy??

One other suggestion, start taking an iron suppliment. It can't hurt, and if you have an iron deficiency, which can show up as being super tired, it will help.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:16 AM   #8
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Re: Why do I feel so lazy??

You need to speak to your doctor about depression. 20 months ago, I could have written your post verbatim.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:22 AM   #9
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I've come I realize I'm just really lazy too. I don't feel depressed. I've been depressed and this isn't it. I'm pregnant, which doesn't help, but I'd rather sit around and let dd watch tv all day then get up and do something. We gardened yesterday and that felt good, but I just feel so inactive. I probably have a phone addiction too, which doesn't help. I feel bad for my husband and my baby, but not for me.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:36 AM   #10
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Thanks mamas. My son will be 3 in 2 months and my daughter is 14 months. I have struggled with depression my whole life, but I've definitely been worse as far as that goes. My aunt mentioned something about thyroid too. When I was pregnant both times I was so debilitated with laziness. I never got out of bed my whole first pregnancy practically. Hubby will get insurance in June. Right now none of us have it. Anyone know if it is my thyroid, what would the treatment for it be? I will also look into some iron supplements and see if that helps! If its not any of that, then I will look into some depression medication. I've never been on it and have always been afraid of it. So hopefully it's something physical that can be treated.
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