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Old 04-23-2013, 06:12 AM   #21
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That's so sweet of her! I know that when my kids are screaming or throwing a fit it seems the world stands there and judges. I think sometimes they are just glad it's not them! You reminded me to reach out in those cases when it's not me!

Thanks for sharing! That woman probably has no idea what a huge blessing she was to you!


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Old 04-23-2013, 06:14 AM   #22
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Re: Horrible mom at grocery store

I've been that horrible mom too! When DD was little she was a very sickly thing and we were trying like crazy to figure out what was going on. She was failure to thrive, so I'm sure people thought I was a horrible mom that wouldn't feed or comfort my child. There are days when I HAD to go get some things, and sometimes I just stuck her car seat in the cart and did it while she screamed. Other times I put her in a carrier but she screamed there too. There was nothing else I could do. She refused food, mostly, wouldn't take a pacifier, and was only more enraged if you tried to comfort her. People would glare at me and give me nasty comments but what was I supposed to do? People are fun, aren't they?

ETA I'm sure there were probably diaper swapper threads started about me during that phase of our lives. Gotta love that, right? That's a lot of the reason I hate it when I see people start threads about the mom at the store...they have NO idea what that family is going through.

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Old 04-23-2013, 06:25 AM   #23
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Re: Horrible mom at grocery store

DS had colic and we barely left the house. He was also my first one and it took a long time for him to get the hang of nursing; and I could only nurse him if everything was set up "just right" position-wise and he refused t nurse unless I was completely hanging out uncovered. Nursing in public was just impossible with that one. If I made an attempt to go to a store, we had to keep the cart moving the entire time otherwise he would cry. It would take 3-4 laps in a single aisle, not to mention the entire store to find what I needed. LOL.
Yes. lots of tears.
Ever since then, if I see a mom with a difficult child in a store, I don't judge, I sympathize. (restaurants are different, but that's a tangent)

Funny story:
A lady I once knew, we were all at the store with her and her 2 year old, her 6th child. We were going through the store with the 2 year old saying "I hate you" in a loud voice over and over. Every time she said it, the Mom said calmly "I love you".
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Old 04-23-2013, 06:30 AM   #24
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Re: Horrible mom at grocery store

When I was reading the story, I didn't immediately think "horrible mom!", I thought "Desperate mom who has a had a long day".
Been there. My 3 yr old threw a HUGE fit, kicking, throwing herself on the floor, screaming so loud the manager came over... and I ignored her while I calmly finished checking out. It took a good 10-15 minutes, b/c the cashier got flustered and screwed something up.
Anyway, I know some people were thinking "Geez that mom is just standing there not doing a thing!" But I had to remain calm, get through the checkout and get the h3ll out of there.
I had not 1, but TWO older ladies offer me comforting words. The lady behind me, who I apologized to, and then a lady stopped in the parking lot while I was putting the groceries in the van.
I try hard not to judge other mothers- I don't know what they are going through and I definitely have my own faults.
Sara Wife to Bret , Mom to Kodi 9-10-00 , Owen 4-21-06 , Luke 8-21-07 , and our miracle baby, June 8-4-09
I'm ashamed of what I did for a Klondike Bar...
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Old 04-23-2013, 06:49 AM   #25
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One time my husband went away in business it was me my 2 yr old 5 yr old and 3 week old. Were at the playground and 5 yr old says mom I dont feel good. I feel his head and he feels hot. So I pack up and we head to the store first bc I need supplies and milk. Anyway we run in just to grab our few things and Meds. My son proceeds to puke everywhere and o course we are at the back of the store with no escape route lol. Luckilly a nice old man helped me. Grabbed a roll of paper towels for my son to hold til we got out of there. We still had to wait in the checkout line because I really needed to buy the medicine
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Old 04-23-2013, 06:56 AM   #26
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Re: Horrible mom at grocery store

I was totally judgey before I had kids, but after I got the perspective that A, crying wont kill a babe, and B, sometimes mom really needs to get out fussy be darned. I'm glad that woman gave you a hug and made you feel better!
J- sahm to Z~12.07, A~4.09 and J~ 8.13
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Old 04-23-2013, 07:01 AM   #27
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Re: Horrible mom at grocery store

Everyone has those days mama. DD2 had a HUGE meltdown in Target just the other day. She just threw herself on the floor and was screaming/crying over nothing. She is 2 and when she doesn't want to be somewhere, that is how she expresses herself. I was ignoring it and (still in the same aisle) continued shopping. People were looking at me in disgust but then she got up and followed along without a word within a few mins. An older woman said to me, "Good job Mom, following through" because I wouldn't acknowledge her fit-throwing behavior. I know you have a very little LO but I couldn't help but reply and say you are NOT alone!!!
Mama of 3. 2 girls ('06,'10) 1 boy via med-free VBAC! ('14) Homeschoolin', cloth diaperin', BF'in fam
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Old 04-23-2013, 07:09 AM   #28
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Thanks for posting this. Watching people, especially other parents, be unkind to moms/parents drives me crazy. Especially because we've all been there. Why do people forget this?

Whenever I am with someone who trys to comment or judge another person's parenting I always remind them that the parent probably loves that child more than they do so try to assume they are doing the best they can. SO was always someone who would walk around with the "why doesn't that baby have a hat on?" mentality. Then dd started refusing to wear a hat in February in New England, no matter how many times we put it on she would tear it off. It was an important lesson, now we were the parents with a baby w/o a hat
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Old 04-23-2013, 07:10 AM   #29
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I have been there, only my "crying baby" was six. Totally serious here.
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Old 04-23-2013, 07:15 AM   #30
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