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Old 05-05-2013, 12:25 AM   #11
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Re: WWYD

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I tried explaining to my manager about the hours not working for me. I explained to her that one of the reasons was my husbands work schedule, and especially in the spring it just does not work bc I have 3 girls who play softball and I have to bring them. He can't. She didn't really care

I never thought about volunteering. I could do that at the kids school, maybe the library...where else??
Do you need the job? Did your boss tell you they would not accommodate you in any way? What are your rights as an employee?

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Old 05-05-2013, 12:56 AM   #12
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Do you need the job? Did your boss tell you they would not accommodate you in any way? What are your rights as an employee?
No she just basically said this is how it's going to be now. And I asked if some weeks I can work 28 hours instead of 30, because some weeks I have an appt or whatnot and she said yea sure but I have to use 2 of my vacation hours that week to get my hours back up to 30. It's just ridiculous

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Old 05-05-2013, 01:22 AM   #13
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Re: WWYD

I would definitely quit the bank job, but just because it looks like he may not be able to work, I'd probably get myself a part time job to supplement. If for nothing else, peace of mind in case something happens to the caregiver program down the line, that way you have something to back you up and not cause a gap in your employment history.
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Old 05-05-2013, 01:26 AM   #14
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I would definitely quit the bank job, but just because it looks like he may not be able to work, I'd probably get myself a part time job to supplement. If for nothing else, peace of mind in case something happens to the caregiver program down the line, that way you have something to back you up and not cause a gap in your employment history.
Yes this is a great idea however she wouldn't have a gap because she would be employees by the veteran's caregiver program.

I think you should wait until your coworker gets her vacation (as long as your family can manage that long until July), work 28 hrs each week and use your 2 vacation hrs per week since you will be leaving anyway. Also I think your landlord has to allow a therapy dog.

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Old 05-05-2013, 04:59 AM   #15
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Hugs. I would quit the bank job and take off for the summer as planned. I would only abstain from working in the fall if my mental health needs are met in other ways. You will only make the ship sink faster if you are BOTH miserable. Best of luck to you.
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Old 05-05-2013, 06:23 AM   #16
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Re: WWYD

Make sure to check into the side aspects of the caregiver program. Are you allowed to take a side job(in many such programs you aren't), etc.etc.

I would dfeinitely seek other employment if I were you, but I don't know if the caregiver job would be what I would seek out.Caregiver burnout is a very real, and VERY dangerous thing.
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Old 05-05-2013, 06:45 AM   #17
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It sounds like you are already his primary caregiver. It would be good to get paid for doing so, but what are you going to do as this situation deteriorates (as you make his health sound like it is failing)? I worry about your mental health also. Being a 24 hour caregiver is a major challenge to deal with long term. I am going on assumptions but I would guess that you have been don't this for a year or two. Just be sure you are looking at this often and that you are willing to reevaluate the situation often. I know your relationship is strained as is, but I worry that will get worse as time goes on because of being a caregiver long term is so very stressful. Please also look into respite care, even if he may be a jerk to them because they will get over it (and are also trained to deal with it) and you both would benefit from it.

As for the dog, look into the housing laqs, but I think your landlord has to allow the dog if it is a service animal, it may be questionable if it is a therapy dog though.
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Old 05-05-2013, 06:48 AM   #18
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I would quit the bank job. I don't like people who manage like that and refuse to be treated that way. If you don't need the extra money from working part time, try to go back to school so you can get a job that you enjoy. I agree about volunteering. My boys and I try to make it to our local humane society once a week to help walk the dogs there. You could also volunteer at their schools or at a local library. Some hospitals have volunteers who come in and cuddle babies. There are also food pantries or soup kitchens. In our area we have beach cleanup volunteering too. There is always a ton of volunteering work to help keep you busy if you get bored.
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Old 05-05-2013, 08:39 AM   #19
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Re: WWYD

1. Accept the caregiver income.
2. Quit the bank job.
3. Double check the caregiver details and make sure you can have additional income. If you can, get a pt job at a coffee shop or book store. If not, look into volunteering or going back to school part time.
4. Yes, your landlord has to accept ADA service animals, but not therapy animals. The two are not the same and the later can be quite a battle.
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Old 05-05-2013, 09:09 AM   #20
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Re: WWYD

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1. Accept the caregiver income.
2. Quit the bank job.
3. Double check the caregiver details and make sure you can have additional income. If you can, get a pt job at a coffee shop or book store. If not, look into volunteering or going back to school part time.
4. Yes, your landlord has to accept ADA service animals, but not therapy animals. The two are not the same and the later can be quite a battle.
Yes to all this, but to #3 I would add, look into substitute teaching. You could train in summer then just work when you wanted. Or bus driver/asst or substitute for either of those. Great money and good hours
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