Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-11-2013, 06:38 PM   #11
luvsviola's Avatar
luvsviola
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Central Indiana
Posts: 17,103
My Mood:
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

I would definitely try to get kiddo to attach to a lovey.

My oldest never did attach to anything til she was about 4. She finally latched on to a special soft fleecy Tangled throw. DS didn't have a lovey and wouldn't take a pacifier. He also refused the bottle (hence the feeding tube). He would scream for hours. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

While it seems like forever now, in reality, it is only a year or so that they are so dependent. If you think about it that way, it makes it not seem so bad!

Advertisement

__________________
Kristen
Middle school teacher by day, super mom by night
Mommy to The Boss~2007, The Energizer Bunny~2009, and The Princess~2011
My kids are no longer in diapers, but somehow, my computer keeps finding its way back here...
luvsviola is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2013, 07:00 PM   #12
Leanbh
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Chi-town burbs
Posts: 6,201
My Mood:
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leiiki View Post
I don't think it's ever too early to talk about feelings. Kimochi feeling dolls are a good tool, but also just clearly explaining what they are feeling, what you are feeling, etc. when strong emotions are in play. "I can tell that you feel sad when kitty doesn't want to play." "Mommy is happy to see you!"

DD has had a grasp of at least happy, sad, mad, sorry, hurt, from when she started putting words together around 18 months. Her playgroup friends seem to have similar awareness give or take a few months and depending on personality/gender.
Yes, I get the happy, sad, hurt....but this is a bit more complicated IMO for a 18 month to grasp that mommy won't be there, but hold this special lovey and it will remind you of mommy.

Before my son was one he would hug or pat the hair of my other kids if they were crying or hurt. So that is a natural thing....I just think this is more of an older conversation



Do you have a certain lovey in mind OP? Stuffed animal, blanket?
__________________
Mama of 4!
and precious little one 11/10/11
Leanbh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2013, 07:18 PM   #13
qsefthuko's Avatar
qsefthuko
Registered Users
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 17,010
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

I don't think it will hurt but be prepared. Not all kids atatch to objects. None of my kids did. Neither did any of my siblings either. None of us thumb sucked for an extended period of time either. Actually only one out of 7 used their thumb and then only until around 5-6 months old and not regularly. As far as I am aware of none accepted the paci either. My youngest would scream bloody murder when I did attempt a paci.

Some kids quite simply want mommy, nothing else will suffice. My mother tells me that one of my sisters and I wanted her and only her. We remained extrememly attached to her from around 8-9 months to around 7-8 years of age(we were extreme).
__________________

Last edited by qsefthuko; 05-11-2013 at 07:23 PM.
qsefthuko is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2013, 07:27 PM   #14
qsefthuko's Avatar
qsefthuko
Registered Users
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 17,010
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

I understand the poster who said she would rather her kids turn to people rather than objects. I said similar until my last. My kids would never use a paci. That is until he screamed bloody murder if I wasn't holding him at all times. Unfortunately for me he wanted nothing to do with any other means of soothing. Only mama would do the trick. I can't imagine how much more difficult it is being a single parent dealing with this.
__________________
qsefthuko is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2013, 07:50 PM   #15
TalkinBoutMyGirl's Avatar
TalkinBoutMyGirl
~Love~
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 13,178
My Mood:
Loveys are great. DD uses one of those white thermal receiving blankets. We have a few as backups. I loved that they can ALWAYS be found in stores if we happen to lose them or they wear out. Plus it was the same kind of "blankie" I had growing up. We did introduce DD to it when she was an infant but I don't think your DD is too old. Just always take it with you wherever you go. If she wants snuggles with you then have the lovey there too, when she is nursing have the lovey there. After she gets used to it you can try having her sooth with it for a minute if you can't get to her right away. Make the time longer and longer. My DD will grab her blankie then come to me for snuggles. It has in no way distances us.
__________________
Anna - Gazelle intense with mywife Rachel and Hailey (6) our little
Swag with Me!
TalkinBoutMyGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2013, 08:10 PM   #16
Leiiki's Avatar
Leiiki
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: WI
Posts: 4,869
My Mood:
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leanbh View Post
Yes, I get the happy, sad, hurt....but this is a bit more complicated IMO for a 18 month to grasp that mommy won't be there, but hold this special lovey and it will remind you of mommy.
Oh, that's not what I meant at all. I actually recommended not giving a lovey. I agree that that is not a correlation they are ready to make. I was talking about feelings in terms of getting her past the "glass-breaking shrieks" when mama has to get up by helping her understand and articulate her feelings.
__________________
Wife to my best friend , SAHM to DD1 (4/15/10) and DD2 (5/16/13)
ISO/IHA
Leiiki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-11-2013, 09:21 PM   #17
MsGiggles's Avatar
MsGiggles
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ottawa, ON, formerly Vancouver, BC
Posts: 1,323
My Mood:
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leanbh View Post
I think a lovey is a great idea that sooths a child when you are aware from them.

But....I'm afraid you LO is a bit too old to "take" to one? Might be worth a shot though.

I used to nurse with the lovey(one has obv, other has A&A blanket) and that is how they associated me/comfort with the lovey. Then they sleep with each...


Honestly I've never heard a negative to a lovey bar losing it, dirty(dragging around the store etc). But most of that can be solved by just leaving in crib/bed.
all of it. GL, mama.
__________________
A (usually) happy wife mama to my BOGO girls, DD1 July 2010 and DD2 Dec 2011.
MsGiggles is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2013, 03:31 AM   #18
5PrincessMommy's Avatar
5PrincessMommy
Registered Users
Formerly: Mrs_Brady
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 12,275
As a kindergarten teacher I hate lovies. That is all.
__________________
Natasha: Mom to toddlers and tweens and everything in between.
5PrincessMommy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2013, 06:47 AM   #19
smblake's Avatar
smblake
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Mountain West
Posts: 6,153
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by 5PrincessMommy
As a kindergarten teacher I hate lovies. That is all.
I will say people need to set boundaries, unless we are going for a long car ride, lovies stay home and mostly in the crib unless dd is feeling extra moody or sad.

We are not the type that let the kids drag them all over town and such.
__________________
Melissa
Wife
Mama to 4 kiddos
5 angels in my heart always
smblake is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2013, 06:56 AM   #20
Leanbh
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Chi-town burbs
Posts: 6,201
My Mood:
Re: Thoughts on loveys?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leiiki View Post
Oh, that's not what I meant at all. I actually recommended not giving a lovey. I agree that that is not a correlation they are ready to make. I was talking about feelings in terms of getting her past the "glass-breaking shrieks" when mama has to get up by helping her understand and articulate her feelings.

gotcha I was thinking you must have a VERY advanced LO
__________________
Mama of 4!
and precious little one 11/10/11
Leanbh is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.