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Old 06-10-2013, 07:27 PM   #31
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Mine are:

1. Don't push prematurely - breathe the baby out.
2. Be open to getting out of the tub to birth
3. More organic interaction with baby following the birth - no hat, no bath, no talking, no holding by other people. I want my birth team to follow my lead.
4. Placenta encapsulation and tincture

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Old 06-10-2013, 08:21 PM   #32
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Re: What would you do differently?

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2. Be open to getting out of the tub to birth
I swear one of the hardest parts of my first birth was getting out of the tub... I cried.
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Old 06-10-2013, 08:46 PM   #33
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My only regret was not getting a water birth. But that was out if my control because my placenta had ruptured a bit. I used the shower during labor.
I was happy with my birthing experience.
Next time I will try to take it a but slower after i get home though. I went shopping the second day I was home and I was very sore from that.
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Old 06-10-2013, 09:15 PM   #34
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Re: What would you do differently?

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I don't think I want visitors this time. Or anyone besides dh and the doula during labor and birth. I was so concerned with pleasing everyone else... Idk what was wrong with me.
I think this is a common first time thing. We all think, "Oh, it's such n such. A part of the family. They are related to the baby as well. Blah blah." Pft! I want my husband there and whatever medical crew is necessary. Everyone else can go fly a kite.

The biggest thing I did differently between my first and second/third births (aside from changing fathers/husbands), was to wait until *I* was ready to go to the hospital instead of when some book or man with a stop watch told me. A couple of other things that helped:
1) calling ahead and proclaiming myself going unmedicated
2) choosing my own pushing position rather than waiting for the nurse to tell me

I've never birthed without a small tear that got stitched up. I need to figure out a better pushing position and REMEMBER it when it's time. My instinct is to sit on the edge of the bed and kind of frogleg/squat.

As for during pregnancy, there's not a whole lot that I feel like I could have or needed to change. If anything, I chilled out on all the squatting and tilting and swaying to prepare for labor, as I did things totally differently when actually in labor!
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Old 06-10-2013, 10:47 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by mcpforever

I think this is a common first time thing. We all think, "Oh, it's such n such. A part of the family. They are related to the baby as well. Blah blah." Pft! I want my husband there and whatever medical crew is necessary. Everyone else can go fly a kite.
This was my attitude with baby #1 and it pissed some family members off. I also had a few friends guilt me over not allowing family to share in the experience. I didn't care and I don't care now. To me, giving birth is an extremely intimate experience and I don't want a bunch of people hanging around, beating at the door, etc. I want to give birth and then get at least a couple of hours for bf'ing and skin-to-skin w/baby, just DH, baby and me. The rest of the world can just wait. I loved that quiet, calm time and am excited to have it again.

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Old 06-11-2013, 12:42 AM   #36
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Re: What would you do differently?

I'm new to all this too, and I'm curious why you're so strongly against episiotomies? It seems that there would be instances where they would be quite helpful (ie in situations where baby can't get out or a significant tear looks inevitable)
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Old 06-11-2013, 01:36 AM   #37
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Re: What would you do differently?

Last time I was already in labor but my dr broke my water. This time I will not let them break my water. I think I would have gone a couple more days if they'd let my water stay intact.

Insist that they bring the baby to me every 2 hours at night to nurse. They didn't with dd 2 even though I asked them to and she got dehydrated and we had to supplement with formula for a minute.

I can't think of much else. im in the minority here probably that I want an epidural. I'm a wimp
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Old 06-11-2013, 07:58 AM   #38
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Re: What would you do differently?

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I'm new to all this too, and I'm curious why you're so strongly against episiotomies? It seems that there would be instances where they would be quite helpful (ie in situations where baby can't get out or a significant tear looks inevitable)
My transition from first time birth to the present (number 4 soon) looked similar. Those of us who are adamant about having an unmedicated birth tend to think in terms of what to avoid and think of them in absolutes. This includes episiotomies since they WERE a common practice years ago and that sort of use was definitely not necessary.

Come to think of it, most of what I read in "natural" childbirth books and even read amongst the natural birthers online reads like an out dated push against medical practices that aren't nearly as common or pushed on mothers as they used to be. And much of it is espoused by people who haven't been in a hospital birthing situation in recent years.

I went into my first birthing experience prepared to fight tooth and nail against "medical interventions." I live in the land of pedicured birthers who schedule inductions before 40 weeks and invite the whole family in to watch with a sheet draped over the intimate parts. Yet, amazingly, I was given free reign! None of this flat on the back in the bed, here's your IV, here's your epi, time to break your water, here comes the episiotomy business. And this was 11 years ago!

Anywho, my point is that as a FTM, you read about all of these scary and unnecessary interventions and then decide you will not have them. In reality these days, at least IME even in the land of perfectly planned pitocin births, saying "no episiotomy" is similar to saying "no blood transfusion" as neither of these tend to be used as a matter of course these days.
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Old 06-11-2013, 09:09 AM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pixi6s

I swear one of the hardest parts of my first birth was getting out of the tub... I cried.
I didn't want to get out of the tub but the position I pushed best in was on my back. So I was going underwater so husband could catch. He had to come hold me up so I wouldn't drown and could more effectively push. I had a really terrible pushing experience, and should have gotten out to squat or lay on the bed. But I wanted (and got) my water birth.
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Old 06-11-2013, 09:15 AM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by catnap
I'm new to all this too, and I'm curious why you're so strongly against episiotomies? It seems that there would be instances where they would be quite helpful (ie in situations where baby can't get out or a significant tear looks inevitable)
Episiotomies can keep from having a CS, as a previous poster said, but that are contraindicated in many instances. You are more likely to have a severe tear with an episiotomy, during the current birth and subsequent births. They're painful to heal and in a "you were going to tear anyway" it's actually better to tear. A jagged Scar is harder to tear again, since scar tissue doesn't knit like skin. A straight cut is convenient for the doctor to stitch, but that's about where the benefit ends. Except, of course, when there is shoulder dystocia and you need the room in the perineum to unstick the baby.
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