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Old 09-04-2013, 08:40 PM   #1
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Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

Curious for your opinions... I'm not really sure what I think of this one. My husband and I were trying to understand why people are for and against them and realized we don't really know all of the reasons. Please feel free to give examples!

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Old 09-04-2013, 09:06 PM   #2
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

My kids are still young but in the future, they will have their normal chores and will be paid for extra work they do around the house. Its a good way for them to earn extras, develop goals and a strong work ethic, show initiative and problem solving skills and bonus for us, be a great way to have help on things I hate doing anyway.....such as vacuuming out the car after a long road trip.

Now, to clarify, my kids will not be paid for everything they ever do. There is a certain amount of chores that are expected because they need to learn to care for their things and their home. The chores I would pay for are extra things that we dont need done on a regular basis or big projects that are going to take some hard work and I dont pay well. They will definitely be earning every cent

I wont be paying them if they show a bad attitude, do not finish the job well and on time. Again, this is to be earned. If I have to be out there bugging them to get the job done , well I guess they didnt want to earn the money that bad.

Lastly, we are minimalist. No fancy pricey stuff for our kids....unless they would like to earn the money themselves for something important.

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Old 09-04-2013, 09:38 PM   #3
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My boys are still too young, but we did this with my SIL. Several years ago my MIL had been unemployed for over a year. SIL was maybe 11 or 12 at the time and wanted extra spending money during the summer so she could do things with her friends like go to the movies or go shopping. I was at the end of my pregnancy and was having trouble cleaning and doing normal stuff. So we would get her maybe 2 times a week and have her help around the house, maybe like mopping the floors, running the vacuum, or help dh with a project he was doing. I think we paid her $25 each time she came over. She knew she had to work to earn her money. After DS1 was born we had her keep doing it so she could save up some money for school clothes in the fall since MIL was still unemployed. I think it was a good lesson for her to learn that if she wanted something she had to work to earn it. She also had to learn how to budget her money and to use her checking account we set up.
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Old 09-04-2013, 10:01 PM   #4
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

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My kids are still young but in the future, they will have their normal chores and will be paid for extra work they do around the house. Its a good way for them to earn extras, develop goals and a strong work ethic, show initiative and problem solving skills and bonus for us, be a great way to have help on things I hate doing anyway.....such as vacuuming out the car after a long road trip.

Now, to clarify, my kids will not be paid for everything they ever do. There is a certain amount of chores that are expected because they need to learn to care for their things and their home. The chores I would pay for are extra things that we dont need done on a regular basis or big projects that are going to take some hard work and I dont pay well. They will definitely be earning every cent

I wont be paying them if they show a bad attitude, do not finish the job well and on time. Again, this is to be earned. If I have to be out there bugging them to get the job done , well I guess they didnt want to earn the money that bad.

Lastly, we are minimalist. No fancy pricey stuff for our kids....unless they would like to earn the money themselves for something important.
This is sort of what I was thinking, if we do it... paying small amounts to teach about money/financing etc. - things that we feel are "extra responsibilities" rather than things they should be doing anyway
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Old 09-04-2013, 10:05 PM   #5
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

DH have had the chores for money discussion. He feels we shouldn't pay her to do chores, that every member of the family should help out as a responsibly.
I see his point, but I also think they should earn some money, to learn that money has value.
this came up because DD asks for EVERYTHING. She's only 5 and doesn't quite have the concept of how much things cost. I grew up spoiled. I didn't ask for everything (not so much bratty, just spoiled) but my grandparents had money and we new it. I don't want DD to think everything comes free.
For now, she has a reward chart and can earn tickets that add up to dollars. Its not much, but I talk to her about spending her $1 vs saving it and accumulating more for a bigger toy.
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Old 09-04-2013, 10:14 PM   #6
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

There are some chores that a kids do because they are part of the family and some that they do because hardwork pays off.
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Old 09-05-2013, 04:25 AM   #7
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

There are some things that they are expected without pay- clean their rooms, pick up after themselves, take care of their dishes, for dd put her own laundry up (except hanging cause she can't reach it). Dh often gives them (well dd, ds is still a bit to young to understand earning money) chores to do to earn money. Mostly out door stuff which falls mostly on dh, but we help out. He'll pay them to pick up pine cones and branches out of the yard (we have an acre cleared and that is whay is considered out yard), weed the garden, he just gave her $40 for watering and fertilizing the garden and flower beds for a months- this required at least 2 hours of hands on watering everyday- we have a big garden and lots of flower beds. LOTS. So so far they earn money for extra jobs. When they get older we haven;t quite decided. Seems like I got allowance until I started working then my mom just gave money every now and then. Right now the plan is anything that is their's specifically they are expected to take care of- rooms, clothes, stuff. Things like dishes, garbage, vacuuming (of the main rooms) and outdoor stuff they will get an allowance.

I feel like their stuff is their responsibility, but our home is not. They are asked to help with stuff that they won't be paid for, that I don't really consider their responsibility just because I need their help and I think its good for them to help people without a reward. And I also think its important for them to learn how to earn and save money. DD finds stuff she wants in the store and comes immediately home and asks dh what she can do to earn the money for it. She has saved her money for something she really wants, but usually she just spends it. We do make her put half her b-day money from grandma in the back and I wish she would do it with her earned money as well, but that is something we are still working on.
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Old 09-05-2013, 06:26 AM   #8
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

We struggle with this as well. We are very much a "everybody helps out, we all live here" kind of family. My kids do all sorts of daily chores and work around the house and get no regular allowance.

But... then we ran into the kids getting older and wanting to buy things. We want to teach money management, and it can begin with earning some money at home and delegating where it is to go and how one will spend it. My kids don't get given "gift money" very often (not a lot of family).

We decided in the end to do a system of points where they can earn small amounts of money for going above and beyond. Doing extra chores, harder (generally bigger) chores, being super helpful and cooperative can all earn them points, which then can translate into money or privileges. Sometimes they get a choice to take part, sometimes they do not (big work days for the whole family). Sometimes they don't get a choice as to what they are working towards. For example, we all went on a big outing last month, and the kids had to earn a certain number of points to "help" offset the cost of that trip and to give them a sense of ownership for the money spent that day.

We have also "hired" our kids to do certain jobs. When my DH is harvesting garlic, he pays our eldest son to help per row. This summer, I paid my DD to help with preschool activities a few days a week. Generally this happens when the kids are saving for a certain item, and again, it is a choice for them to do the work or not. Daily, expected chores are non-negotiable and not for money.
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Old 09-05-2013, 06:48 AM   #9
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

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Originally Posted by Geckmumto3 View Post
We struggle with this as well. We are very much a "everybody helps out, we all live here" kind of family.
That's pretty much how I grew up too and I never received an allowance of any kind. But I ended up doing A LOT that really wasn't my responsibility, just because I was the oldest, etc. which is part of what's making me consider this - sometimes I do ask my oldest to do things I really don't feel like I should expect of him but sometimes just "need" him to do b/c he's the only one there who "can" do it when I can't, and I don't want him to ever feel like he's being unfairly treated.

When we were older, my dad did lend us large amounts of money, though, trusting/teaching us to pay them back.

Love the responses - they're giving me lots to consider.

How do you organize your charts and how do your LO's store their earnings? If anyone can share pictures, I'm curious! Trying to figure out how to do this...
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Old 09-05-2013, 07:26 AM   #10
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Re: Allowances/letting your children "earn money" etc.

I will also add that especially for teenagers, its important to teach them money management skills, budgeting, have a bank account, earn and spend in a responsible way. I know TOO many college age students, some my own relatives, that do not know how to write a check or budget well, they dont have good work ethics or responsible behavior. Its not all their fault! They are hoisted out into the world at 18 and everything has always been provided and they have no concept of what things cost and how long it takes to earn that.
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