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Old 11-19-2013, 04:21 PM   #1
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Stressful Decision

I am very unexpectedly expecting #5, and the stress of deciding where/with whom I will deliver is literally making me ill. I'd love some level-headed, outside input from you ladies!

DS1 and DS2 were both quick, easy, and natural deliveries at our local hospital. If I could have chosen home births, I would have, but my hospital experiences were great

DS3 was a 33wk breech preemie, born by c-sec.

In between DS3 and DS4, our local hospital put a No-VBAC policy in place, so...
DS4 was a quick, easy, natural VBAC at a third hospital (which was local to us at the time, but we've since moved back to our hometown).

So now LO#5 is on the way, and I've got a dilemma.
-I obviously do NOT want another c-sec, so delivering at our local hospital is out.
-DS4 was born spontaneously (NO pushing) in one contraction, about an hour after labor began, so it doesn't seem reasonable to assume we can make the trip to another hospital (the closest being 30 minutes away).
-We've been planning and working toward a home birth with some local midwives, but a couple of circumstances beyond our control have left us in a spot where we honestly no longer think we will be able to pay for the home birth. I have about 6 more weeks inside the window where I could withdraw from their care without still owing them the entire fee.

What do I do??? I have literally laid awake at night for the past few nights worrying about this. Ugh.

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Old 11-19-2013, 05:49 PM   #2
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But you already had a VBAC? I would check with the hospital and see what they say. Or just tell then that you last birth was vaginal and leave it at that. If they fuss, and there truely is no way to get your homebirth I would wait until your deeper in labor to go. I would not go in for a planned c/section!
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Old 11-19-2013, 05:53 PM   #3
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Re: Stressful Decision

Some midwives do payment plans....? Maybe you could talk to yours about your situation and see what can be worked out.
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Old 11-19-2013, 07:31 PM   #4
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Re: Stressful Decision

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Originally Posted by mrseum View Post
But you already had a VBAC? I would check with the hospital and see what they say. Or just tell then that you last birth was vaginal and leave it at that. If they fuss, and there truely is no way to get your homebirth I would wait until your deeper in labor to go. I would not go in for a planned c/section!
Yes, I would check with the local hospital first, emphasizimg that your most RECENT delivery was vaginal and you are doing that again. See how that plays out before stressing over other options. I'm not sure this birth would even be considered a VBAC anyway.

Last edited by Melinda29; 11-19-2013 at 07:33 PM.
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Old 11-19-2013, 08:37 PM   #5
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Re: Stressful Decision

Erm, not to be snarky or anything, but if you show up to the local hospital in labor what are they going to do? They can't preform a c-section without your consent. Worst case scenario, I'd just go into the local hospital in active labor and pop the baby out. They can't really say, "Um, no, lady with a head coming out of you, you cannot birth that kid here. Put it back in."

Have you talked to the MWs about your current situation? Would they be willing to work with you? IME midwives are far more likely to adjust payments for your needs than any other birth professional. Are you paying OOP? Would they consider letting you make smaller payments to extend longer than the original time frame?
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Old 11-19-2013, 09:29 PM   #6
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Re: Stressful Decision

I agree with talk to your midwife! She might be able to work a deal or extend you payment dates. Maybe you can barter?
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Old 11-20-2013, 06:31 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by Hillargh View Post
Erm, not to be snarky or anything, but if you show up to the local hospital in labor what are they going to do? They can't preform a c-section without your consent. Worst case scenario, I'd just go into the local hospital in active labor and pop the baby out. They can't really say, "Um, no, lady with a head coming out of you, you cannot birth that kid here. Put it back in."

Have you talked to the MWs about your current situation? Would they be willing to work with you? IME midwives are far more likely to adjust payments for your needs than any other birth professional. Are you paying OOP? Would they consider letting you make smaller payments to extend longer than the original time frame?
I have wondered about this myself. If you are in labor and you refuse a csection how can you not have a vbac? I remember a few years ago hearing stories of women being threatened with calling CPS if they didn't agree to a c/s because it was putting the babies life in danger. But I don't know if that actually happens or is just a story. Op if it were me I would get more information on your local hospitals policy and talk to my midwife about payments. My guess is one will make more sense after you get all the info.
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Old 11-20-2013, 07:06 AM   #8
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Re: Stressful Decision

I agree with the PP's.

I've recently been seeing a CNM that practices through the local hospital b/c insurance covers her 100%. BUT, I don't feel comfortable at all about the policies of the hospital, or the way the lawyers make her practice.

So up until just yesterday I was planning to just hire a doula (cheaper than the local LPN birthcenter) and have her meet me at home while I labor and then just show up with her and DH like, at transition, at the hossy and just basically birth as I show up. LOL. "so sorry, no time for continuous fetal monitoring, internal checks, IV, etc. baby's already crowning!"

But, just this past Monday I contacted my old LPN about a concern I had and she informed me that not only do they offer payment plans, but a couple different discounts depending on your situation. I thought about that after I finished talking with her about the other issue and hung up. Then yesterday I was talking with DH about it and he and I both looked at our finances and discovered that we will be able to afford to go with the LPN midwife and pay OOP by qualifying for a discount and then paying with a payment plan.

If I was you I'd first talk to the homebirth midwife and see if she'll work with you financially.
If she can't then I would just plan to labor at home until the very end and then show up at the hossy ready to push. A doula would be able to help you labor at home and try to keep you as comfortable as possible while on the way to the hossy. Then either she or DH can deal with the nurses and "paperwork" while you just show up to deliver your baby
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Old 11-20-2013, 03:19 PM   #9
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Re: Stressful Decision

I worry about the just show up approach. I've heard there are hospitals around here that will transfer a woman in the middle of a limbs coming out miscarriage rather than save a mother's life and help the miscarriage occur (because the baby is still technically alive), if they are willing to do that I could see them refusing to admit you or calling Child Services on you for just showing up and forcing their hand.

I would try really hard to afford the home birth personally -- call in favors, take out a loan, etc. If that really isn't possible I would work with the half hour away hospital and goto the closer one as a last resort. Course I also choose a birthing location almost a hour away from me for my second to get a birth center rather than one of several closer hospitals so you may be able to see where I stand i general.
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Old 11-20-2013, 07:59 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by bdhutier View Post

I have wondered about this myself. If you are in labor and you refuse a csection how can you not have a vbac? I remember a few years ago hearing stories of women being threatened with calling CPS if they didn't agree to a c/s because it was putting the babies life in danger. But I don't know if that actually happens or is just a story. Op if it were me I would get more information on your local hospitals policy and talk to my midwife about payments. My guess is one will make more sense after you get all the info.
Sure, they could call. But 1) by the time anyone was able to do anything the kid would be born and 2) I seriously doubt it would hold up in front of a judge if you're in active labor. They threaten a lot of things to play the power card.

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