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Old 02-15-2014, 07:38 PM   #11
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Re: Does anyone else just get sick of it???

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Originally Posted by Holly dolly;17245957@

I'm tired of organizing one area of my house and in that time have another area become a war zone.

I feel like I'm treading water...and barely keeping my head above water.
Every time I accomplish something in our household mess, I get happy that I took a step forward. Then I turn around and see what they did to then cause me to take two steps back.

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Old 02-15-2014, 07:57 PM   #12
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Feeling the same way :/
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Old 02-15-2014, 08:42 PM   #13
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Re: Does anyone else just get sick of it???

Yup.

Sounds like you need a girls weekend. Find a friend. Make plans for a month from now. Tell DH he is on his own from Friday at 6 til Sunday at 6.

Girls weekend is liberating. We don't do anything special. Just hang out without kids. It is fantastic.
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Old 02-15-2014, 08:49 PM   #14
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Re: Does anyone else just get sick of it???

Exactly how I feel. I told my husband that I was ready to run away the other day.
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Old 02-15-2014, 10:20 PM   #15
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Re: Does anyone else just get sick of it???

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Originally Posted by luvsviola View Post
Yup.

Sounds like you need a girls weekend. Find a friend. Make plans for a month from now. Tell DH he is on his own from Friday at 6 til Sunday at 6.

Girls weekend is liberating. We don't do anything special. Just hang out without kids. It is fantastic.
Yes!
I do this and it totally helps.

But I agree 100% with the OP. I spent all day yesterday cleaning and today.. well it's clean but it's sure not tidy anymore. We don't have a dishwasher and I some days I swear if I have to wash the plates one more time I'm going to scream!!
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Old 02-15-2014, 10:55 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvsviola
Yup. Sounds like you need a girls weekend. Find a friend. Make plans for a month from now. Tell DH he is on his own from Friday at 6 til Sunday at 6. Girls weekend is liberating. We don't do anything special. Just hang out without kids. It is fantastic.
I agree. I go away for the weekend very once and a while. I stay with friends and we have more than a blast. I come home pumped to be a wife and a mom. I miss it after 2 days.

DH gets time with DS. They bond and have man time eating crap and doing everything under the sun that would drive me crazy.

Now that DS is older he likes that I go away sometimes. We both need a break from each other.
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Old 02-16-2014, 07:30 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by luvsviola
Yup. Sounds like you need a girls weekend. Find a friend. Make plans for a month from now. Tell DH he is on his own from Friday at 6 til Sunday at 6. Girls weekend is liberating. We don't do anything special. Just hang out without kids. It is fantastic.
This is great in theory. Doesn't happen though. I can rarely get my dh to take both boys. If he does take them he can't handle them and when I come home I have 10 times the work...AND a cranky hubby.
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Old 02-16-2014, 07:40 AM   #18
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Re: Does anyone else just get sick of it???

Holly, I don't think the house or the boys are really the issue. We all have daily challenges as mothers and homemakers. I'm afraid your struggles are being made insurmountable by your relationship with your DH. Not having a partner. Being married to a person that you feel takes you for granted is miserable and depressing. If your intention is to continue being married to this person and potentially have more children(is your siggy accurate?) You need to have a major overhaul of your marital relationship. Could you spend some time this week looking for resources like counseling?
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Old 02-16-2014, 08:03 AM   #19
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Re: Does anyone else just get sick of it???

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I love my husband...and I love my kids...but I'm struggling to find joy in any of this. I feel used and taken advantage of. I feel like a maid and a cook and a referrer and a play thing.
*hugs* I was there about 3 years ago. I had a baby, we moved twice, bought a house, partially renovated it, & lived with ILs for almost 5 months during that time. Plus I worked part-time, and in that time period DH went from working 40 hours a week to working 55. In hindsight I think DH and I were both a little depressed on the other side of all of that. It was this time of year, too, which I REALLY think plays a part in it. I didn't handle it well -- if I had it to do again I would be more upfront with DH about how I felt so unappreciated. He literally would not lift a finger to help when I was home unless I asked, and when I asked it was like he was a sullen teenager. He would agree but in such a way that I'd rather just do it myself! He eventually just sort of came around which is why in hindsight I think maybe he was dealing with a little bit of depression.

In your case it sounds like maybe some counseling might help?

Do you take any supplements? Can you squeeze a physical into your busy schedule and have some bloodwork done? I wonder if you are deficient in any thing -- that can really play a part. Maybe you need to take a vitamin D supplement.

It's a sucky place to be. I hope that you are able to find some answers/solutions.
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Old 02-16-2014, 09:17 AM   #20
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Ugh, big hug. Can you have an honest talk with him about doing his share?

I'm constantly reminding myself that as much as I want to do everything for DS and SDS I need to NOT do it so they learn to clean up/do their share.

DH was a little spoiled by his mom having taken care of everything while growing up, which I was not about to do when we started living together. It took the 5 years before we had our own kid to get him closer to sharing the responsibilities. Much better now, but wow, it was a challenge - and really tough. I just couldn't work 40+ hrs week, cook, clean, laundry, exercise, take care of SDS when with us, and take care of myself. Not an easy process, but better than before.
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