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Old 07-24-2014, 06:23 PM   #21
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Oh my goodness these stories are just so sad. My parents are not overly huggy but I can't imagine not having any physical interaction.

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Old 07-24-2014, 07:32 PM   #22
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

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I didn't realize she was nice to other people,I thought the whole family just ignored everyone . It sounds like there is a definite personality clash between you and the family but that still doesn't explain the kids having no expression and not making any noise. I am assuming this is a family from church and I wonder if it has something to do with them feeling more 'holy' than your family. Most of the people we know are wonderful ,amazing families but a few seem to feel like they are so much more righteous than the rest of us heathens.:eyeroll: They can't believe we let the world see our girls have knees (shocking realization) and that they have watched star wars(the shame) and are allowed to play with public school kids (the horror is just too much to bear)! It definitely reflects in their attitude towards our family and from what you are saying about your interactions with them it seems to be that vibe. It is really stupid and I have learned to just blow it off but I wonder if they are encouraging the children to act the same way. This isn't just a Catholic or Christian thing but I have seen it at church and they are generally the most judgemental, nasty people to be around. I see this in homeschooling also, their two year old can read Shakespeare and their children never even seen a tv because they are too busy curing cancer, while my child is in the corner eating glue.But none the less in no way detracts from your speechless awesomeness!
So what your saying is that these people moved here from your town. psst Don't tell them I have the internet.

We should collaborate on a book, maybe we should call it "If You Think Your Holier Than Thou, Then Your Obviously Not."

I've accepted the mom keeping the distance but I had never considered that the children might pick up on the vibe.

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My experience is that it can be strict parenting or personality OR parents that provide very little verbal/emotional stimulation and support for their children. I have come across several children that are like that. The parents care for them with regard to food and whatnot but they are not expressive at all. They dont smile, engage, read together, tickle and bond in those sort of ways. The child is just not expressive at all due to environment.
That makes me sad. I hope it isn't that.

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I have encountered a family much like this, and I can honestly say it's because there are no emotional needs being met. They are fed, given clean clothes, and food to eat, but there is no emotional interaction. A lack of hugging and I love you's.

I am a strict parent in that I do not let my kids get away with much, but they are the most expressive, creative, sensitive, gentle children you could ever meet. Being strict does not negate the cuddles, ya know? I think this family you are speaking of a direct product of strict parenting AND a lack of emotional stimulation.

I could be wrong, and I hope I am, of course. It makes me sad for these children.
You know when I first asked the question I was wondering if anyone had met children like this. The day I saw them was the first time I had seen them all together like that outside of a church setting where you would expect a degree of quiet and sitting still.

I thought maybe there was some strict parenting system that results in still children so I could sign mine up. (Just kidding.)

I was hoping it was not some sort of emotional detachment. But honestly, I probably won't ever know.

Edited to add: Although these people go to my church which results in my running into them fairly often we run in different circles. Our circles sometimes overlap enough to be necessitate being cordial but that's about it. My circle is the bad, naughty circle. You know the one with internet.
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Old 07-24-2014, 08:06 PM   #23
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So what your saying is that these people moved here from your town. psst Don't tell them I have the internet.

We should collaborate on a book, maybe we should call it "If You Think Your Holier Than Thou, Then Your Obviously Not."

I've accepted the mom keeping the distance but I had never considered that the children might pick up on the vibe.

That makes me sad. I hope it isn't that.

You know when I first asked the question I was wondering if anyone had met children like this. The day I saw them was the first time I had seen them all together like that outside of a church setting where you would expect a degree of quiet and sitting still.

I thought maybe there was some strict parenting system that results in still children so I could sign mine up. (Just kidding.)

I was hoping it was not some sort of emotional detachment. But honestly, I probably won't ever know.

Edited to add: Although these people go to my church which results in my running into them fairly often we run in different circles. Our circles sometimes overlap enough to be necessitate being cordial but that's about it. My circle is the bad, naughty circle. You know the one with internet.
I have heard about you internet bunch! I of course am telepathically posting this so I don't dare poison my mind with the scourge that is the web.
They may have not come from my town but they must have been trained by others like the ones here. I think the book is a good idea ,I seem to be very good at unholiness (the holy part seems to be more of a challenge) so I could probably write a book about it.
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Old 07-24-2014, 08:48 PM   #24
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

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I have heard about you internet bunch! I of course am telepathically posting this so I don't dare poison my mind with the scourge that is the web.
They may have not come from my town but they must have been trained by others like the ones here. I think the book is a good idea ,I seem to be very good at unholiness (the holy part seems to be more of a challenge) so I could probably write a book about it.


Too late! We made you look.

No web at home but it's acceptable to use it at the library, or at a friend's, or to call me to look something up (totally forgot about that) because that is completely logical.

I do believe there must be a training school somewhere.

If I could only sneak in and see what is being taught about child rearing.
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Old 07-24-2014, 09:03 PM   #25
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

What I wouldn't give for eerily quiet children, mine are shockingly wild!
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Old 07-24-2014, 09:13 PM   #26
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Too late! We made you look.

No web at home but it's acceptable to use it at the library, or at a friend's, or to call me to look something up (totally forgot about that) because that is completely logical.

I do believe there must be a training school somewhere.

If I could only sneak in and see what is being taught about child rearing.
Ha I didn't look I had someone read it to me and type my response!
It is fine for your internet ruined self to look it up because you are already scandalized . You probably even feed your kids non organic,non enriched WHITE bread that wasn't licked by rainbow farting unicorns!!!! And your kids don't grow their own cotton to sew their own fair trade clothing on machines powered by bicycles. Also I am pretty sure someone saw you at the non
latin last week. It is just too much to think about, probably better not to even peek in on the child rearing, obviously you have already failed.
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Old 08-06-2014, 09:37 PM   #27
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

I wouldn't be concerned about the quietness/stillness only. My first born would sit quietly and pay attention to something for very long periods of time starting at about 15 months. My daughter would do that too.. in public. My third child is swinging from the chandelier if I glance away! lol
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:30 AM   #28
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

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What I wouldn't give for eerily quiet children, mine are shockingly wild!
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Originally Posted by KaliShanti View Post
I wouldn't be concerned about the quietness/stillness only. My first born would sit quietly and pay attention to something for very long periods of time starting at about 15 months. My daughter would do that too.. in public. My third child is swinging from the chandelier if I glance away! lol
I have a couple of loud ones and the rest can be quiet too.
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:30 AM   #29
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

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What I wouldn't give for eerily quiet children, mine are shockingly wild!
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Originally Posted by KaliShanti View Post
I wouldn't be concerned about the quietness/stillness only. My first born would sit quietly and pay attention to something for very long periods of time starting at about 15 months. My daughter would do that too.. in public. My third child is swinging from the chandelier if I glance away! lol
I have a couple of loud ones and the rest can be quiet too.
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:30 AM   #30
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Re: What kind of parenting results in...

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What I wouldn't give for eerily quiet children, mine are shockingly wild!
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Originally Posted by KaliShanti View Post
I wouldn't be concerned about the quietness/stillness only. My first born would sit quietly and pay attention to something for very long periods of time starting at about 15 months. My daughter would do that too.. in public. My third child is swinging from the chandelier if I glance away! lol
I have a couple of loud ones and the rest can be quiet too.
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