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Old 05-07-2015, 07:47 AM   #1
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28 months old and feeling alone ....

Now that my son is over two-years-old, I have started to feel kind of alone when it comes to nursing an "older" child. I know I am not the only one. But sometimes I feel a little weird.

This weekend I went to this event and there was a room for baby care and I went in to nurse my child to sleep. Well, I was the only one with a child over one. Nobody said anything but I really felt myself constricting into the chair. We no longer nurse in public because he wants to move from breast to breast all the time, and it drives me batty when he lifts my shirt.

I guess I am looking for encouragement. I had no idea I would still be nursing at this age, much less 5 times a day. I also have no clue when we will fully wean. It feels like he is going to go on FOREVER. I think 3 is the oldest I will do, but I didn't think we'd make it to six months and here we are.

We have a close bond and I think this is what makes it harder to wean.

Thanks for reading.

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Old 05-07-2015, 08:32 AM   #2
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

I am a FTM and have no real advice for you but I wanted to say that you are amazing! That's an awesome commitment. My family thinks I'm crazy for nursing past a month or two especially since ds and I have been struggling with it from the beginning. Maybe it's just the experiences I've had but beyond two years is just unheard of. You are doing a great thing for your child
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Old 05-07-2015, 09:53 AM   #3
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

Thank you.

I think I have been feeling more pressure to quit. My family has been really supportive but now it just feels like I should just stop because he should become more independent (or that's the message that I get).

Frankly, I don't know how to wean. Breastfeeding seems so much easier than figuring out if he got enough nutrition during the day. And he is a really picky eater so I am constantly fretting over how much and what he ate.
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Old 05-07-2015, 12:54 PM   #4
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

I understand where you are coming from. I just weaned my youngest about 2 months ago. He will be 4 in June. Really my milk just dried up so nursing was painful. He, only last night, informed me he no longer wanted to nurse. Until then he would still ask to nurse.

He was my earliest weaned by a couple of months. Just as clingy now as he was when nursing. Independence comes with age not weaning.

The looks and comments can be difficult though. Just do your best to ignore them.
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Old 05-07-2015, 07:37 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by qsefthuko
He was my earliest weaned by a couple of months. Just as clingy now as he was when nursing. Independence comes with age not weaning.
Great comment and totally makes sense. I'll have to remember this.
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Old 05-07-2015, 10:42 PM   #6
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

I nursed my daughter until she was about 29 months, and the only real reason I weaned was because I was pregnant.

If you are not enjoying your nursing relationship, then it's perfectly acceptable to start setting limits (like not nursing in public) to make you more comfortable.

When I started weaning my daughter, I started with limiting and then cutting out the daytime nursing sessions. Eventually I told her that we could only nurse in bed for sleep times (naps and nights). After a while that got to be too painful and cringe inducing as the pregnancy progressed, and I started limiting and dropping those sessions as well.

That said, you should only initiate weaning because *you* want to, not because someone else tells you you should. Your nursing relationship is between you and your LO. The natural, normal self weaning age is between 2 and 7 years, so you're well within the range of biological norms. While it is less common in North America, it's not bad or gross or damaging or causing your child to be more dependent than he would be if you weaned. If anything, the opposite is true. Children that have "independence" forced on them are often more clingy and dependent than children who are allowed to develop their own independence on their own time.

Just remember - haters gonna hate, lactaters gonna lactate. :-)
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Old 05-10-2015, 10:04 PM   #7
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

Good for you. You are doing an amazing thing for your child!

I weaned at 9 months and am still sad about it! I never had a super amazing breastfeeding relationship, but it is so good for them. And that doesn't magically stop at 12 months.
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Old 05-11-2015, 05:15 AM   #8
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

I don't know how others weaned, and I don't know how I will wean this second child. My first child self weaned at 2.5 when I was several months pregnant. Yep, the social/nosy commentary in the US at even less than a year can be rough, especially depending on what your family's breastfeeding history is. Good luck growing the thick skin.
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Old 05-13-2015, 09:43 PM   #9
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

You are def not alone!
I know many mamas who have continued bfing long past the first birthday and personally I am one of them. With #1 I nursed for 2 yrs and he self weaned due to milk flavor changed since I was pregnant.
With #2 I nursed for almost 3 yrs but had to wean as I was pregnant again and started getting crampy towards the end. It was very sad for me but my daughter seemed to be somewhat okay with it. She kept asking for it and I tried to explain why she couldn't but that once we got to Sweden(that's where I am from and all my babes are born) then she could have some again. I felt like if I went in to labor at that point I'd be okay....Once she tried nursing again she had already forgotten how to suck properly. Okay, that was a long side note lol
I don't know how long I will nurse #3(he's 4 mos) but I will keep it up as long as he wants to. At this point I have been nursing/lactating for 5 1/2 yrs straigt....
I agree with pp, the most important thing is to quit bc YOU want to, not bc someone else wants you to bc you are making them uncomfortable...You are doing something great for your child!!
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Old 05-14-2015, 08:35 AM   #10
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Re: 28 months old and feeling alone ....

Another FTM here. I'm only 8 weeks in and all I can say to you is way to go!!!!
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