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Old 11-21-2006, 10:17 PM   #31
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

We will be 27 and 26 when this baby is born.. I'm 99% sure we are done. I'm going to push for DH to get a vasectomy. I'm absolutely not going on BC... and I don't think we have enough willpower to use condoms or any other barrier method effectively.

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Old 11-22-2006, 12:05 AM   #32
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

I don't think your age is nearly as important as the fact you aren't 100% certain you don't want any more children. I'm 20, and I know for sure that I am done. I'm an only child, and I want to raise an only child. I have always felt that way. So, my DH will be getting snipped very soon.

But, since you are still thinking you might want additional children, but money is the main thing holding you back, I think you should wait and not do anything permanent. Financial situations can always change- you never know what the next 5 or 10 years might bring.
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Old 11-23-2006, 12:59 PM   #33
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

Thanks everyone for the advice. It's all really great.

DH and I talked again last night about it and he says that if I am not 100% sure then he would rather wait.

Then I said I could get an IUD and he said "No way" he's totally scared of them for me, heard too many bad things, so we are going to talk with my OB about it at my 8 week appointment to see what other options we have.

Maybe NFP, our OB is really big on it soo we'll see.

DH found a website on V's and it had questions to ask yourself to see if you are ready for one or not and when he asked me he said "okay you're not ready for something so permanent".

He said he just doesn't want the responsibility of us not getting pregnant to be all on me ie. protection but I said well the only thing you can do really is condom or V or no sex. LOL

So anyway not sure how long we are going to wait, really no time limit just we will do it when we are both ready.

Thanks again ladies.
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Old 11-23-2006, 01:14 PM   #34
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

I wouldn't decide on something so "Forever" I would think about a IUD, it works just about as good as "getting fixed" but it's completely Undoable.

I might be a little Biased as I have one. lol (mirena, love it!)

ETA: Yeah, didn't read the replies.. Oh well! DH had no choice in me getting one. I said I was getting it and he was in Iraq. lol)
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Old 11-24-2006, 10:07 AM   #35
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

I don't think it sounds too young. I think everyone needs to decide what is right for their own family and age doesn't have to be a factor. Sure, you could still have babies for another 10-12 years (or more) but not everyone wants to have babies at older ages.

I'm 28, will be 29 when this baby is born, and DH will be 29 in January. I KNOW in my heart that I am done biologically having babies. We have always talked about adoption and may re-visit that idea later down the road. But I know for me, 4 is perfect and I'm all done. I'll be having a tubal. Dh would be willing to have a V, but I don't trust them, especially with how fertile we are

I think if you know financially you can't add another child and you know for sure you want to be a SAHM, then maybe your family is complete. Perhaps you can look at adoption someday, too. There are a lot of children in this world that need a loving home.
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Old 11-24-2006, 10:49 AM   #36
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

My sister has infertility problems. I have fertility problems. I married at 21. By 28 I had 4 kids and 5 pregnancies. I can't use the pill due to health problems. I wish I had done the 5 yr IUD. I have heard a lot of good things about it. I think it is an excellent alternative for those who are pretty sure they're done, but want to make sure before they take the plunge. It's a great way to have something long term and yet not permanant. You can remove it if you change your mind, or do the vascectomy before your 5 yrs if fully up. But I highly recommend making sure HE does it. Women take much longer to recover from tubals than men do with a v. I'm now 29 with 4 kids. I KNOW I am done. But that's also clarity I didn't have when I was 26 with 3 kids...
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Old 11-24-2006, 11:09 AM   #37
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

My dr advised both dh & I against sterilization at 24 & 26 with DS#5. I had issues with my Mirena's in the past, 2 expelled, 1 time I knew and the other time I didn't until after my bfp & an u/s. But she said she would try the Mirena again under close watch and so far so good. Its been 10 months and no babies. If I can go about 5 more months w/o getting pregnant we'll have a new record!
If you do decide to do sterilizations, there is a new non-surgical method called Assure that causes your tubes to close completely which could later be helpful for IVF. My dr said that if I did want to have another baby later on I could just save $20k and get IVF, they'd rather have your tubes blocked off anyway. LOL I did actually sign papers in advance to birth that if I needed an emergency c/s that I'd opt to be sterilized while they were in there. Dh doesn't want a V, I don't want a tubal... we don't know whether or not we definatly DON'T want more. We love babies, kids, family! We could probably handle one more and then THAT would be it. LOL 6 is my final number, unless of course God blessed us with twins again! hahaha!!
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Old 11-24-2006, 12:05 PM   #38
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

I don't have time to read the other responses, but have you considered an IUD? There are hormonal and non horomonal options and they have similar (or better) failure rates to steralization. I was really scared to get mine but its been a week and its great.
Good luck on your desicion
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Old 11-24-2006, 01:14 PM   #39
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Re: Does 27 & 30 seem young to say no more??

Dh and I were both 27 when this last one (#4) was born and I signed the paper that said if I had to have a c-section for any reason that I wanted my tubes tied while they were in there.

But with 4 living kids and 7 total pregnancies, we knew we were done. I said I was done after having my second two kids 13 months apart and having 3 under 3yo but a little part of me still wanted another, just not anytime soon! I got the IUD (we are also quite fertile, easy pregnancies, quick labors...) and had it for 3.5 years before we were ready for another kid. We got pregnant 6 mos after having it removed but I was on bedrest for the rest of the pregnancy at 14 weeks. It was a total chance thing, abruptio placentae which means the placenta had lifted partially from the uterine wall. My labor was still pretty quick and easy but I had to be induced at 36 weeks due to the placenta issue. The reason I'm telling you this is because I had the same kind thoughts you did, I'm still young and all my other pregnancies have been easy pease but I learned the hard way even the healthiest of people with normally perfect pregnancies can still have a problem pregnancy just by chance. (Everything was fine in the end btw, the baby was observed a little more closely at first as they considered her a preemie but she never even went to the NICU at all, was discharged from the hospital at 2 days old and other than being smaller than my full term babies she's been a picture of health) But because I had her vaginally and I didn't want surgery if it wasn't absolutely neccesary (and since we don't want anymore but it wouldn't be the end of the world if we did have more we didn't consider it neccesary) and dh won't have a vasectomy for his own reasons, I now have another Paragaurd IUD and I love it. I would encourage you and dh to find out more about them. They are really quite safe nowadays not to mention effective (something like 99% effective, same effectiveness rating as sterilization but easily reversible and with the Paragaurd which doesn't have hormones you don't have any of the side effects of hormon based birth control).

I agree with everyone else, age isn't really the issue here,you are done when ever you no longer feel like someone is "missing" from your family.

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